


In Heaven

by TheNevemore



Series: Watching Over You [1]
Category: Big Bang (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Angels & Demons, Alternate Universe - Supernatural Elements, Angst, Demon Youngbae, Guardian Angel, Lots of Angst, M/M, Major character death in the first chapter, Mildly Dubious Consent, Rated For Violence, all the things, but!, damnation, he's dead but not gone, literal Angel Daesung, mentions of drug use, so there's that, suicidal character, there is also fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-17
Updated: 2015-10-19
Packaged: 2018-04-26 20:47:26
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 18
Words: 57,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5019928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheNevemore/pseuds/TheNevemore
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What would you do to save the one you loved?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> I should mention that this fic is a bit of a rollercoaster ride. I did my best to be accurate in my depictions of addiction and depression, but this work is ultimately a piece of fiction that is not necessarily accurate. In the one chapter where the suicide storyline comes to a head, I will post a second version of the chapter that has the more trigger-y stuff removed; I will clearly mark which is which. Also, I should mention there is no smut in this fic - this really is just rated M for the mature themes present throughout the fic.
> 
> That said, I hope you enjoy! I'm currently also working on the sequel to this piece, which is called Fallen, and will post that here on AO3 as well. Thanks for reading!

Morning crept slowly into the room: inching bright sunshine along the foot of the bed until it caressed the sharp line of the man’s jaw. When it finally reached his eyes, he muttered unintelligibly into the stillness before rolling over, tugging the blankets up over his head. He wiggled slightly to the left, his body seeking the familiar heat that always kept it company on Saturday morning. But, instead of soft flesh, his body encountered the dry crinkle of paper. One eye immediately shot open, and the offending piece of paper was lifted for examination.

 

> Hey Love,
> 
> I had to go into the office to finish a project. If I am not back by the time you wake up, know that I love you! And I left you breakfast from our favorite bakery on the table. I should be home in time for lunch. Be good!
> 
>                         -Daesung

 

An immediate pout found its way onto Seunghyun’s lips at the sight of the note. Who worked on a Saturday? He knew the answer to that without trying; Daesung worked far too hard for his own good. Rolling over, he snagged his phone off the nightstand and checked to see if he had any messages. The first one he opened was a picture from Daesung: His beautiful lover was pouting playfully at the camera. Seunghyun chuckled and sent back a picture of him lying in bed, his lips tugged into an even more exaggerated pout. The second message in his phone was from Ji-Hyo, his childhood best friend and Daesung's older sister. She had simply reminded him that Daesung’s birthday dinner was that night and they simply could not be late. Daesung’s sister was very fierce when she wanted to be; Seunghyun knew better than to upset Ji-Hyo – especially when it came to big events. He quickly texted back that he promised to be on time, no matter how good Daesung looked in the new suit Seunghyun had bought him for his birthday. After checking through his emails, Seunghyun rolled out of bed and crawled into the shower. Somehow it seemed like a good idea to clean up for the big day.

Once freshly showered and dressed, Seunghyun wandered out to the kitchen and smiled at the veritable smorgasbord of pastries Daesung had left for him. Considering the fact it was Daesung’s birthday, he certainly was doing his best to spoil Seunghyun.  _Typical Daesung,_ the man thought with a bit of a chuckle. He had made it halfway through his cup of coffee before a second message came in from Daesung. Instead of a pout, this picture featured Daesung pretending to be buried underneath a stack of papers. Seunghyun snorted. His boyfriend was the most ridiculous creature under the sun. In response, he sent a picture of his empty plate, which was covered in delicious crumbs. Almost immediately, Daesung sent back a picture of him grinning and giving a thumbs up.

“I love you, Daesung,” Seunghyun replied. “Can’t wait til you come home so I can sing you Happy Birthday and give you the sort of hello you deserve.”

“I love you too, Seunghyunnie. Always and always and forever. I should be home in an hour.” Seunghyun smiled to himself at the amount of sunshine Daesung managed to pack into one little text message. His lover was one of a kind.

After cleaning up – putting the pastries away in plastic containers so they would not go stale – Seunghyun sauntered into the living room and turned on his favorite classical mix. He then settled onto the far too fancy winged back chair Daesung had managed to tuck into the brightest corner of the room and opened the book he had been working on for the past week. Lost in the pages of  _The Book Thief,_ he did not even notice that an hour had melted into two. His stomach giving a sudden grumble of protest brought Seunghyun’s attention from the pages of the book and back to reality. He blinked. Brow furrowing, he picked up his phone and frowned at the time. “Still working on your project?” he texted.

A couple of minutes later, Daesung replied: “Yeah. Hit a snag. Sorry to be so lame.”

“You’re not lame, love,” Seunghyun sent immediately. “Just come home soon. I miss you.”

With a sigh, Seunghyun returned to his book and kept reading. But, only ten pages in, he began to feel restless. Shutting his book with a thud, Seunghyun frowned. He hated that Daesung was trapped at work on his birthday. That was it. Maybe Daesung needed a birthday intervention. The book was happily tossed aside as Seunghyun surged to his feet. His keys, wallet, and phone were quickly stuffed into the pocket of his favorite jacket before he wormed into his shoes. All set, he walked out the door with a wide grin on his face. Whether or not Daesung liked it, he was going to let that silly project wait until the weekend was over. He had walked halfway to the subway station when the sight of his and Daesung’s favorite bakery slowed his steps. “A cupcake might help my cause,” he mused. Nodding to himself, he pushed the door open and stepped inside.

“Seunghyun!” The normally cold baker broke out into a wide smile at the sight of the other half of his favorite couple. “Daesung was here this morning. Did you already finish everything he took with him?”

Seunghyun chuckled and inclined his head slightly. “Not quite, Taehyun. But, I am going to surprise Daesung at work. It’s his birthday, so I thought one of your double chocolate cupcakes might make my smiling angel feel better.”

“It’s his birthday?” Taehyun rolled his eyes, and immediately his normal sassy expression was firmly back in place. “He should have told me. If I had known, I would have given him a discount or snuck a surprise in the box for him.” The young man sighed heavily – acting for all the world like he was a disappointed father – and went to get a cupcake. “Did you want extra chocolate curls on it and a candle?”

“If it wouldn’t be too much trouble,” Seunghyun said easily.

“Tch, you two are anything but trouble. If anything, you help keep my business afloat. Though, I have no idea how you two eat so many pastries and stay so skinny.” He eyed Seunghyun as though he could figure out where the man hid his extra fat.

“Daesung makes sure I work it off every night,” he said with something of a naughty grin, which just made Taehyun laugh.

“Well, tell Daesung happy birthday for me.” Taehyun packed the cupcake into a little container, the candle taped to the top, before passing it over to Seunghyun. The man reached into his pocket to pull out his wallet, but the baker scoffed. “My compliments. Leave before I change my mind.” He pretended to glare at Seunghyun, but his laughter followed the man out the door.

As Seunghyun was walking down the steps to the subway, his phone began to ring in his pocket. Rather than continue his descent, the man turned around and darted to the surface. His phone hated the subway, and it was almost always too noisy to hear down there anyway. He rolled his eyes a little at the sight of Ji-Hyo’s name on the caller id; she was such a nag. “Hello?”

Silence.

“Ji-Hyo? Are you calling me about the party tonight, because everything is-“

“-It’s Daesung.”

His blood chilled at the strange crack in her voice. “What about Daesung?”

The cupcake fell to the ground – splattering inside its container.

 


	2. Can't You Stay?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just because Daesung is dead, it doesn't mean that Seunghyun will be rid of him just yet. If anything, Seunghyun needs Daesung now more than ever.

“Daesung.”

The blond pinched his eyes shut even tighter – his nose scrunching up with the motion.

“Daesung.”

He sighed a little and rolled over. “Hyunnie, I don’t wanna,” he mumbled, reaching down to find the blanket so he could pull it up to cover his head. When his fingers found nothing, Daesung opened his eyes and looked down the bed. Except, he was not in a bed – certainly not the bed he shared with Seunghyun. No, instead he was laying on  _something_ that seemed to crackle with little flashes of white lightning. Yelping, Daesung lept straight to his feet and onto the floor.

“Good, you’re awake,” a somewhat bored sounding drawl voiced from his left. “That makes my job easier.”

Daesung turned to take in the stranger before him. He was lanky and angular – a bit taller than him to boot. His soft features were pulled into a look of tired disinterest, like he was already so over the entire conversation, and his brown eyes lacked any real spark. The most striking feature about the man was his hair, which was styled into a white and black pompadour; Daesung had never seen anything like it.

“Are you done gawking?” Daesung was surprised when the man spoke, and he gave a quick nod. “Good, because it was kind of lame. Right. So you are Kang Daesung. I’m Kwon Jiyong, and I am going to be your trainer.”

A confused little frown worked its way onto Daesung’s full lips. “Trainer?” Jiyong nodded. “What for?”

The man’s thin shoulders rose and fell with a heavy sigh. “You don’t know.” He shared a glance with the ceiling that made it seem like Jiyong was blaming someone upstairs for his present predicament. “Right, let’s try this again.” In a smooth motion, he straightened his jacket and adjusted his cufflinks. “My name is Kwon Jiyong. And you’re dead.”

Daesung’s mouth fell open before he started to laugh softly. “That’s pretty good. Did Seunghyun pay you to do this? It’s more his style than anyone else’s. We met through one of his practical jokes.” Jiyong just watched him with that same bored expression. “… You do know Seunghyun, don’t you?”

“I know of him,” Jiyong said after a long moment of watching Daesung begin to sweat. “Actually, he is why I’m here. He’s our first order of business.”

Daesung took a slow step back. “Order of business? I am afraid I don’t know what is going on, and if you don’t explain quickly… I’ll scream. For help. Very loudly.”

Jiyong’s lips twitched like they were just repressing a smile. “Oh, you are going to be such an exciting case, aren’t you? How about we take a step outside, let you walk around a bit, and I’ll explain?” The blond gave a slight nod, which made the strange man smile at last. “Excellent. Right this way.” Giving a teasing bow, he gestured towards the door.

Keeping his gaze locked on Jiyong, Daesung slowly made his way over to the door and opened it. Rather than walking directly through, he carefully checked to make sure nothing dangerous lurked just out of sight before slowly making his way out. Once he was fully outside, Daesung slowly let his gaze wander over the plethora of glistening white buildings – all of which seemed to sparkle and crackle with the same energy as the thing he had been lying on earlier. “…Where am I?”

“The Realms of Glory,” Jiyong said easily, trailing along after Daesung. “Heaven, if you’d rather.” Daesung shot him a disbelieving look. “Hey, I already said you were dead. It shouldn’t be that surprising to you that you ended up here.”

Taking his bottom lip between is teeth, Daesung chewed on it for a long moment. “Does that...make you an angel?”

Jiyong snorted softly. “Unfortunately,” he mumbled. “Yes.”

“You don’t look like an angel,” Daesung said slowly.

“Looks can be deceiving,” Jiyong replied, flicking a hand impatiently. “Right. So, you are dead. I am an angel. And so are you. I am going to be training you on how to be an angel and do all the things.”

“All the things?” Daesung squinted at Jiyong. “Like what?”

“If you would just let me finish, I would tell you.” Jiyong gave the blond a pointed look, which made Daesung duck his head a little. “I am going to train you in one of the primary missions we angels have: saving souls. We usually assign one angel specifically to help try to redeem a soul, particularly when we know they are going to die. You are-“

“Does that mean I had someone with me, when… when I died?”

Jiyong heaved a sigh. “Yes. Your angel did a very good job of making certain you were redeemed. Otherwise you would not be here. You would be in the either neighborhood.”

Daesung nodded slowly. “Oh.”

“Is that all you have to say? Oh?” Jiyong rolled his eyes. “Did they leave your brain back in your body? Honestly.”

“Will I ever get to meet my angel?”

Jiyong planted his hands on his hips. “Yes. We’ll throw a party and do limbo and drink ambrosia. But first you have got to do your job.” He pinned Daesung with a sharp look. “You have been assigned someone that no one else can save: Choi Seunghyun.”

The blond’s face became pale as worry creased his brows. “Seunghyun? But you said you only assign an angel when someone is – is going to die. He’s too young to die.”

Ignoring the irony of that statement, Jiyong continued, “I don’t determine when someone is going to die. I just know that the battle for Seunghyun’s soul is on, the deadline is drawn, and you’ve been assigned to save him. But since you’re just a baby angel, I’ve been assigned to help you.” He clapped his hands. “Right. Now that we’ve got that out of the way. Awesome. Means the next step is I get to fill you in on what you’ve missed. And boy have you missed quite a bit. I don’t know that you’ll recognize your Seunghyun.”

Before Daesung could say anything, Jiyong snapped his fingers and they were standing in a police station. Daesung gasped softly. His sister, Ji-Hyo was seated between Seunghyun and her fiancé, Junsu. Her expression was completely blank; the only sign of her distress was how white her knuckles were as she clung to Junsu’s hand. Beside her, Seunghyun looked like an absolute wreck. His eyes were swollen and red, as though he had been awake four days straight, and his usual immaculate appearance was nowhere to be seen. Daesung took a slow step closer, listening as the officer explained what had happened. “Kang Daesung was crossing the street when a distracted driver ran the light. The vehicle made contact with his body at full speed, and he was killed on impact. In the photograph you will see signs of trauma: bruising and lacerations – not to mention his broken nose.” The police officer sat the picture face down on the table in front of Ji-Hyo. “When you are ready, turn this over and indicate if this is your brother.” Seunghyun began to tremble. It took Ji-Hyo several long moments before she slowly turned the picture over.

An animalistic cry slid past Seunghyun’s lips as he recognized the full curve of the lips he loved to kiss every night and every morning, as he looked at the shattered shape of his favorite hooked nose, as he looked at eyes that would never disappear as his Daesung smiled. He buried his face in his hands and began to sob, his entire body racked with the agony of his heart. Ji-Hyo took a slow breath before saying, her voice utterly void of feeling, “It’s him. Daesung.” Whenever she was upset, Ji-Hyo tended to shut down rather than try to cope with her feelings. By the sound of her voice, Daesung could tell she was hysterical. 

The officer nodded. “When you are ready…I can take you to see him.” He glanced between the three of them before rising. “I’ll give you a few moments.”

After the policeman had left, Junsu pulled Ji-Hyo into his arms and pressed a kiss to her temple. None of them spoke: Ji-Hyo stared blankly ahead; Seunghyun cried; and, Junsu cradled Ji-Hyo against his chest as best he could with the armrests between them. Several minutes crawled by before the police officer returned. The trio slowly rose, walking as though they were in a dream, and followed the man to the morgue. Daesung trailed along behind them, fascinated as they walked into a room where his body lay on a gurney – only his head showing. When the door closed behind them, Seunghyun walked over to stand beside the body and fell on his knees. Reaching under the sheet, his hand found the body’s, and he clung to the stiff fingers as though he could will them back to life. “Dae,” he choked. Daesung felt the tears begin to spill down his cheeks. “Please, Dae. Don’t.. Don’t leave. Can’t you stay by my side, Dae?” Seunghyun then broke down, utterly beyond words as he poured his soul into crying. Ji-Hyo silently walked over and placed her hand on his shoulder, her gaze fixed on her brother’s broken features.

From where he stood beside Daesung, Jiyong frowned slightly. “He really loves you,” he murmured – for once his voice was gentle.

Daesung managed to nod. “He’s my heart and soul.”

Reaching over, Jiyong gave his shoulder a squeeze. “It’s not going to get better,” he warned. “It’s going to get worse. Are you prepared for that?”

“Honestly?” Daesung’s gaze was still locked on Seunghyun. “No. But if it’s to help Seunghyun… Okay.”

Jiyong snapped his fingers, and they were in the room with Daesung’s casket. The room was empty, but for the flower wreaths and the two angels. Walking closer, Daesung frowned. “That suit… It was the one I had seen in the store window anytime I went downtown. I wanted it more than anything because it reminded me of the first time I met Seunghyun. But I never bought it.”

“Seunghyun had bought it for you,” Jiyong murmured. “For your birthday.”

Pain flashed its way across Daesung’s too expressive features. “Oh, Seunghyun…” Tears pricked at his eyes yet again. At that moment, the door opened and a single figure dressed entirely in black entered. Seunghyun. He came straight to the side of the casket – within scant inches of the angel – and gazed down at the face of his dead lover.

Silence crawled on as Seunghyun stared and stared at Daesung’s face. Then, slowly, he reached down to move Daesung’s bangs down over his face; they had been swept back in the sort of style the blond only sported for work functions. “Dae,” Seunghyun finally murmured. “I .. never got to say – say goodbye.” He drew in a ragged breath. “I’ll love you for always and always and f-forever. But, skies, Dae, why did you have to leave me? I can’t live without you. Every morning I wake up and I wonder why I’m still alive. I’m nothing without you.” His fingers brushed along the soft curve of Daesung’s jaw. “Can’t you come back to me?” Bending over, he pressed a soft kiss to Daesung’s stiff lips – a heartbreaking goodbye.

“You can offer him comfort,” Jiyong said softly.

Daesung’s teary gaze lifted to meet the angel’s. “How?”

“Touch him. He’ll feel your presence, even if he can’t see you.”

Without a word, Daesung threw his arms around Seunghyun and buried his face against his back. He could feel Seunghyun shudder in his grip, and the man stood up straight once more. His eyes closed, as though he was trying to soak in the feeling with every fiber of his being. “Dae…” This time, Deasung’s name sounded like a sighed prayer on Seunghyun’s lips. The man was still crying, but there was something different in his countenance – a flicker of peace.

When Ji-Hyo and Junsu entered the room, they both walked over to stand beside Seunghyun. Ji-Hyo quietly hugged Seunghyun and leaned her head against his chest. Seunghyun wrapped his long arms tightly around her, as though by holding her close he was keeping a piece of Daesung with him.

Jiyong reached out to grab Daesung lightly by the arm. “You need to see what happened after … but I need to give you a warning.” The scene in front of them paused, and Daesung tried to peel his gaze away from Seunghyun in order to look at his trainer. “After your death, Seunghyun fell apart. He stopped going outside and began drinking. But, when that no longer numbed him enough, he… he sought something stronger.” Jiyong licked his bottom lip. “Your rival for Seunghyun’s soul has been hard at work while you have been transitioning, and at the moment he is winning.”

Daesung gaped at Jiyong. “My rival? Winning? What are you talking about?”

Jiyong cleared his throat. “Whenever an angel is assigned to a case, a demon is also assigned. You know, battle between good and evil and whatnot.” He licked his bottom lip. “If Seunghyun dies as he is, he will go to Hell.”

The blond’s eyes went wide. “Hell? But – Seunghyun can’t go to Hell!” Daesung stumbled back. “He’s the sweetest person ever. I know he looks cool and chic, but he’s really just a goof that loves to make people laugh. How could someone like that go to Hell?”

Folding his hands in the small of his back, Jiyong rocked up onto his toes. “As I said, Daesung, he changed a great deal after your death. He became cruel and started doing drugs and has been doing … terrible things. And if we lose the battle for his soul, he… He’ll commit suicide.”


	3. Lies, All Lies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A battle for Seunghyun's soul could never be just one-sided, could it?

Daesung had always been meticulous about keeping the apartment clean: Every item had a designated space, and Seunghyun always made certain to return everything to where it belonged – he lived in fear of Daesung’s cleanliness lectures. He had sat through only one of those in his life, just after he and Daesung had moved in together. It had been the most horrifying hour ever; his angel could be quite the little demon when the mood struck. But, three months after the funeral, Daesung would not recognize the apartment anymore.

Every visible surface housed a bottle of alcohol: some full, some empty, some spilled on their sides. The windows were swathed in dark material; the breezy white curtains Daesung had bought his second week in the apartment were mysteriously gone. Trash littered the floor, the ashtray was full, and a constant haze seemed to fill the air. It was filthy. Worse yet, the apartment’s sole inhabitant looked like an absolute disaster. Seunghyun was sprawled out in the wide bed, which had sheets so dirty that it seemed they had not been changed since Daesung’s death. (Seunghyun had not had the heart to change them; he imagined he could still catch a hint of his lover’s cologne on them.) The man was staring blankly up at the ceiling – his blood sluggish with a nearly fatal amount of alcohol – and contemplating the spider web that clung to the light fixture. His hair was disheleved and long, hanging in mats about his wan face. It almost seemed you could see the skull stretching beneath his skin, so pale and gaunt had he become. 

As he continued staring, the shadows in the farthest corner of the room twitched – morphing together to form the figure of a man. The broad length of his shoulders tapered down into a slim waist; his hips giving way to powerfully built legs. He was lean muscle and tan skin – masculine beauty from head to toe. And when he moved further into the room it was with a sliding step that made it seem as though he was gliding across the dark wood floor rather than walking. In a word, he was utterly effortless. His cold dark eyes examined the man on the bed, and a slight smirk twitched at the edge of his lips. “Too easy,” he murmured. “I don’t even have to try with you, do I?” Tipping his head quickly to one side, he tossed the messy black lengths of his hair out of his eyes before taking a seat on the edge of the bed. “Oh Seunghyun… What fun should we have today? You’re already dead drunk, so we don’t need to work on that.”

A sudden sparkle entered the man’s eyes, and he slid up to curl his body around Seunghyun’s side. “I bet I know what would help you,” he teased, sliding his hand along the man’s chest. “And I know just the place. Nothing helps you forget the person who broke your heart better than a good f–“

The angels entered the room in a sudden flash of bright light. The man pressed against Seunghyun let his head roll back in a smooth motion until he could gaze down his nose at the pair. His jaw twitched. “You.”

Jiyong went very still – his gaze locked on the stranger. “You.”

Daesung, who had been too busy gaping at the strangely sunken figure of his lover, started at the sound of the ice in Jiyong’s voice. He not yet heard the angel be anything other than bored or annoyed; hearing the other angel emote was like finding a masterwork underneath a stark layer of white paint. Jiyong’s expression became blank. “Jiyong, what… Seunghyun.” The young angel took a step towards the bed, but he hesitated at the sight of the figure draped out sensually beside his lover.

Raising an eyebrow, the stranger gave him a slow once over. “So you’re the baby angel that’s going to fight me for Seunghyun’s soul?” He scoffed. “Nice to know I’ve already won.”

Daesung’s hands slowly curled into fists. “Who are you?”

Smirking, the man let his fingers begin to ghost lightly over the top of Seunghyun’s thigh. “I’m the demon that’s going to make sure your lover goes straight to Hell.” He winked at Daesung. “I’m Taeyang.” Daesung could hear Jiyong gasp slightly behind him.

The blond managed to stand tall and square his shoulders. “You can try,” he said simply, “but I will stop you. He is mine.”

Taeyang laughed easily. “Oh, little angel, you are already too late. And it’s not like that one,” he jerked his chin towards Jiyong, “will be any help to you. Go home, baby angel. Play your harp and forget about your lover. That’s all you angels are good for, anyway.”

“You know what, I think I’ve heard enough,” Daesung said. If Seunghyun had been able to hear his voice, he would have shuddered; the blond angel had whipped out his lecturing voice.

“Daesung, we should go. Come –“ Jiyong reached forward to grab Daesung’s arm but was surprised when the younger man shook him off.

Without a word, Daesung stomped over to the bed and grabbed the demon by the front of his shirt. He lifted the demon straight off the bed, bringing their faces within inches of one another. His jaw twitched. “You touch Seunghyun again,” he murmured softly, his voice strangely gentle considering nature of his words, “I will tear you to pieces. There would be no corner of Hell deep enough to hide you from me. This might be a game to you, but he is my heaven. There is nothing I would not do to protect him." He gazed deeply into the demon’s eyes, causing the man to begin to shudder and sweat.

At last, Taeyang broke and looked away. A choked laugh slid past his lips - the sound quivering strangely in the scant space between their faces. “Whatever, angel boy. You wouldn’t hurt me. That’s not what you guys do.” He smacked Daesung’s hand away and rolled off the bed. “This doesn't change anything." And then he was gone: shadow returned to shadow.

The moment the demon was gone, Daesung whirled around and pinned Jiyong with a cold glare. “And you,” he growled, his voice holding even more menace than the time Seunghyun had made him go through a haunted house. “What was that? What kind of angel are you that you would even  _dare_ to suggest that we abandon Seunghyun when he needed us?”

Jiyong’s head snapped back as though he expected to be hit, and a pained expression flickered across his normally blank features. He winced. “It’s complicated,” he murmured, trying with all his might to avoid Daesung’s gaze.

The blond scowled. “You and I are going to have a long talk about this later,” he warned. “But right now, I need you to tell me what I can do. How can I help Seunghyun?”

Folding his arms over his thin chest, Jiyong fell back into being the cool figure he preferred to be. The threat of “later” was ignored; Ji did not even want to think about what the goody-two-shoes newbie was going to do to him. “What do you think would help Seunghyun deal with his grief? I mean, you know him better than I do. I just read his file.”

Daesung shot Jiyong another piercing look before moving to sit lightly on the edge of the bed. His hand came to rest lightly on Seunghyun’s, which made the man’s fingers twitch beneath the angel’s warmth. “His brother. Mino. The two of them are very close, and Mino could make Seunghyun happy when even I couldn’t.” Daesung licked his bottom lip. “But I don’t think Seunghyun would let him in.”

Jiyong snorted. “That we can take care of. Locks are nothing.” The angel cracked his neck. “Right. Well, let’s go get Mino. And we’ll see if we can’t help him along in at least getting Seunghyun … less drunk.” He eyed the nearly lifeless, filthy figure on the bed with a bit of a grimace. Seunghyun was disgusting.

Daesung gave his lover’s hand one last squeeze before rising to his feet. “Alright. Let’s go.” He took Jiyong’s arm and thought of where he knew Mino would be this time of day – the art gallery Ji-Hyo owned. Suddenly, they were standing inside of the wide space that was currently housing a collection of art dedicated to antique chairs. Daesung blinked. “Did.. I bring us here?”

“I certainly didn’t,” Jiyong drawled. “Look at you go, baby angel. You’re learning fast. That’s good. Means less work for me.” Reaching up, Jiyong straightened his hair before looking around. His eyes narrowed. “Where are we?”

“My sister’s art gallery. Mino works here and frequently has exhibits here too.” Daesung started towards the studio at the back of the gallery. “Seunghyun one day came to pull a prank on his brother – putting glue in the soap container in here. But –“ Daesung smiled to himself, “Mino wasn’t working at that time. When Seunghyun realized he had caught the wrong person with his little trap, he was so embarrassed. He took me out to dinner that night as an apology and even made sure my sculpture was safely wrapped so it wouldn’t dry out before the next day.”

Jiyong’s eyebrow arched. “You were an artist?”

“On the weekends. I was not like Mino or Ji-Hyo, who could live off of it. But I did fairly well.” Stopping, he pointed to a delicate sculpture of a young woman standing at the edge of a cliff, looking like she was moments from flying away. “I did that for Ji-Hyo’s birthday last year.”

“You’ve been holding out on me, baby angel.” Jiyong stepped closer and examined the sculpture. “Huh. I bet with a few more years, you would’ve been amazing. It’s got the glow.”

“The glow?”

“Yeah. I don’t know the official term for it, but works made by true artists have this sort of a glow to them. Like they shine from within.” Jiyong shrugged loosely. “Then again, a lot of the stuff in here seems to have it. Must mean your sister has a good eye for talent.”

A soft smile turned Daesung’s lips – the first Jiyong had seen. “Yeah. She’s got a gift for it. We joke that she could find the beauty in a pile of rubble and talent in the shell of a man.”

“Well, that’s pretty, uh, neat, I guess. Anyway.” Jiyong cleared his throat and leaned away from the sculpture. “Mino.”

“Right.” Daesung lead Jiyong into the studio and pointed to a figure hunched in front of a canvas. “That’s him.”

Walking around to the side, Jiyong nodded slowly. “He’s attractive.” The young man in front of the canvas had the same strong eyebrows and gently curled lips as his elder brother, but it was clear that they had otherwise taken after different parents. Where Seunghyun had a thin, angular face, Mino instead had a heart-shaped face that was full of gentle curves. “In his own way.”

Daesung stepped closer and looked at the canvas, frowning. It was entirely blank. He had never known Mino to struggle to draw; the artist could fill a canvas with caricatures if no other muse took him. But, instead of happily creating, Mino simply stared at the stretched fabric as though it might being to speak to him – telling him why everything had gone so very wrong. “How do we get him to Seunghyun?”

Jiyong sighed at Daesung, as though the answer was obvious. “We tell him, of course. If you touch him and tell him what to do, he’ll think it was just a thought he had. It’s how the human mind copes with divine inspiration, I guess.”

The blond angel took a slow breath and thought carefully over his words. “Okay.” Reaching out, he placed his hand lightly on Mino’s shoulder – just like he used to when he was alive. “You need to go see Seunghyun. He’s falling apart, and you are the only person that can put him back together again. Please try.”

Mino slowly sat up, a frown turning his lips. He gave the canvas a wary look before, in a sudden motion, rising and throwing on a jacket. The brunette was gone almost before the angels could even blink. “Well, then,” Jiyong said, looking after the artist. “I guess he’s good at listening.”

“He has probably been thinking along those lines for weeks,” Daesung murmured. “That or all the listening to his muse has made him more receptive.”

Jiyong shrugged. “Either way, we should get back to Seunghyun. Make sure less savory company hasn’t come back.”

Daesung grabbed Jiyong’s hand, and they were in the bedroom in a flash. Seunghyun had not so much as twitched from where they had left him.

On the way to Seunghyun’s apartment, Mino raced up the stairs of the subway – nearly stopping dead at the very top. He remembered… Seunghyun had told him what had happened the day Daesung died. How he had stood at the top of these stairs and heard that his lover had been in an accident. How his lover would never get to celebrate his birthday. Mino licked his bottom lip. He could understand why Seunghyun was acting the way he was; his brother loved Daesung deeply. But it was also so worrying, because his brother had shut everyone out. How could he get better if he let the wounds fester in the darkness?

“Maybe today he will let me in,” Mino muttered to himself before starting down the street once more, his full lips twisting further into his frown. And then a sweet scent caught the man’s attention. There, just a little ways down the street, was a rather classy looking bakery that was all black and white and steel on the inside. If he remembered right, Daesung had mentioned the bakery near their home – claiming it was the best one in all of Seoul. He hesitated before going inside. A snack from the bakery might remind Seunghyun of the good times… or it would at least appeal to his sweet tooth. Sugar was usually the first thing his brother binged on when he was sad.

“Hello, welcome to NamCat Bakery,” the man behind the counter said, his upraised brows and unimpressed expression not particularly inviting. “What can I get for you?”

Mino cleared his throat and sauntered closer to the counter. “Uh, hi. I’ve never been here before, but my brother… I wanted to get something for my brother. He loves this place.”

The slim baker let his eyebrows droop into a more curious than hostile expression. “Who’s your brother? If he’s a regular, I’d know what to grab.”

“Seunghyun. Choi Seunghyun.” Mino tugged on the end of his baggy t-shirt. “I think he’d come here with Daesung a lot.”

Taehyun’s expression immediately changed into a bright smile. “Seunghyun? Oh, of course I know him! He and Daesung used to come in every week – sometimes twice. Though, I haven’t seen them in, skies, months, I guess.” He happily went about grabbing a double chocolate cupcake and the special cupcake of the week – a turtle caramel cupcake with chocolate ganache.

The artist ducked his head. “You..hadn’t heard, then?” Taehyun stopped what he was doing at the obvious pain in Mino’s voice. “Daesung… Daesung passed away. He was hit by a car.”

“Oh my…” Taehyun braced his hands on the counter to steady himself. “I am..so sorry. I didn’t know.” He hesitated, fidgeting with a stray sprinkle on the steel surface. “I … Daesung would always get the double chocolate cupcake with extra curls on it. He claimed it was like heaven, except better because it was real. And Seunghyun would get whatever cupcake was my special that week. Sometimes I’d even have them test cupcakes for me, just because I knew if Seunghyun liked it, it was good.” He licked his bottom lip. “The last time I saw Seunghyun it was Daesung’s birthday. He picked up a double chocolate cupcake – extra curls – to take to him at work.” Realizing he was rambling, the man fell silent.

Slowly, Mino’s gaze rose to meet Taehyun’s. “Thank you for taking such good care of them. I.. I hope that something from here will remind Seunghyun of the good things that he and Daesung shared. That it might help him mourn.”

“Has..he not been doing well?” Taehyun asked carefully, as though his words were glass that might cut Mino. The artist shook his head. “I’m so sorry. Here, let me make these up for you. Maybe…maybe even just the scent of the cupcakes will help. Seunghyun always commented on the smell – said it was integral to his experience.” Features now drawn into a determined expression, Taehyun made the cupcakes like they were pieces of art rather than mere baked goods. He even added the extra curls, just because it looked naked with only the regular amount. Then, carefully, he boxed them up and sat them on the counter. “Tell Seunghyun he is welcome here any time. Even if he just needs somewhere quiet to sit.”

“Thank you.” Mino managed a crooked smile before paying for the cupcakes – he insisted against Taehyun’s better judgement. “I will be sure to tell him. And, if it works, maybe I’ll be back again. It might be the medicine he needs.”

Taehyun bowed slightly. “I’ll pray that it works,” he said simply. “Good luck.”

Mino sighed. “Thank you.” Turning, he carried the cupcakes out like they were precious sculptures he had to protect from the bustle of the crowds. When he finally arrived at Seunghyun’s apartment, he knocked on the door and waited. No answer. He tried again. No answer.

Inside, Daesung raised an eyebrow at Jiyong. The older angel stepped forward and tapped the doorknob with one finger. “If he tries it, it’ll be unlocked,” he said, shrugging for the hundredth time.

And, luckily, Mino gave the doorknob a wiggle. When it gave beneath his hand, he stared at it before slowly pushing the door open. “Seunghyun?” No answer. Worried that something had happened to his brother, Mino walked into the apartment and, shoving bottles out of the way, sat the cupcakes down. He then waded through the waste in the apartment, searching for signs of life. When he finally found his brother, a soft gasp slid past his lips. “Seunghyun…”


	4. Looking For Your Traces

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is brotherly love enough?

Mino had no real idea what state his brother was in: Seunghyun had not been seen by his friends or family in weeks. The only way anyone knew he was alive was the way he’d curse through the door at them when they came to check on him. So, when Mino walked into the room, he felt his breath catch. Seunghyun did not so much as twitch at the sound of his brother’s voice calling his name. He just stared and stared into the void of the ceiling. Mino’s shoulders sagged. Not hesitated, Daesung walked to the younger man’s side and touched his shoulder. “Clean up. Let the light in,” he murmured.

The brunette stood tall and walked over to his brother. “Seunghyun. You need a shower.” Using a surprising amount of strength, Mino pulled Seunghyun out of the bed and into his arms. The man hung limply in his brother’s grip; he did not have it in him to care that someone had intruded on his grief. Mino grunted – shifting the weight of his brother in his arms – before carrying him into the bathroom. He peeled off the lays of sticky, stiff clothing; it looked as though Seunghyun had been in the same outfit for at least a week…if not longer. Reaching over, Mino turned on the shower before looking at his brother with a faint frown. This was not going to be easy. “Come on, Seunghyun. Time to get clean.”

Once Seunghyun was bathed, dried, and dressed in a fresh pair of pajamas, Mino carried his brother out to the winged back chair – the only surface in the apartment not covered in trash. He then pulled the yards of black fabric off the window, letting the sun shine brightly across Seunghyun’s rice paper skin. “You stay here,” Mino ordered firmly before going into the kitchen.

While Mino went about with a garbage bag (and a pair of rubber gloves), Daesung moved over to Seunghyun’s side. He then carefully sat on the man’s lap and curled his arms around his lover’s neck. He pressed as much of his body against Seunghyun’s as possible – trying to engulf him in angelic warmth. “Seunghyun,” he whispered, “you need to come out of this. Destroying yourself is this is wrong – it hurts me to see you like this.” He pressed a kiss to Seunghyun’s stubble-littered chin. Seunghyun sighed, his eyes slipping shut, and his lips parted as though he was about to speak – silence. No sound came out.

From where he stood in the corner of the room, Jiyong watched them with a deep frown etched onto his soft features. His heart ached for Daesung – he knew how the man probably felt – but what made it worse was how much the blond cared. When Seunghyun was taken, it would destroy the delicate young man. Jiyong pitied him. And Mino seemed like a good kid. It’d be a shme to see how his brother’s suicide haunted him. But, Jiyong could see no way for them to win. Seunghyun was so far gone, and Taeyang… Well.

Once all of the bottles were gone and the trash disposed of, Mino approached the quiet, sacred space of the bedroom. Daesung rose from his perch on Seunghyun’s lap and followed him. His features set in stone, the angel took in the sight of the bedroom and Mino carefully pulled the black fabric from the window. It was even worse in the light. But, Daesung knew what had to be done – he understood why this room of any of them looked the way it did. Crossing to Mino yet again, Daesung wrapped an arm around his shoulders and said, “Change the bedding.” For the first time, Mino hesitated at the angel’s suggestion. “Change the sheets. Wash the bedding.” Daesung knew that Seunghyun had not changed the sheets because they were the last place he and his blond lover had lain tangled together. For Seunghyun, they represented the countless nights where Daesung was no longer by his side, but he could pretend that the man was simply gone to the other room to get a drink of water. It was keeping the man locked in place.

Slowly, Mino moved to strip the bed – touching the sheets as though they were made of razors instead of once-silky cotton. They were carefully put away in the hamper in the bathroom; Mino would do laundry in a little while. He then searched through the closets and found where Daesung had carefully packed all of the linens away, tiny packets of lavender and cedar between each set. Selecting a rather ordinary looking set, he turned back to face the bed and froze. Holding the sheets in his arms, Mino at last began to cry – burying his face in the sheets that bore no trace of Daesung beyond the careful way they had been folded. He sank to his knees and bowed to the floor, his forehead pressed against the cold wood. Daesung rushed to wrap his arms around Mino. “I wouldn’t want Seunghyun to sleep in tat mess. You’re helping make things better – the way that I would want them, Mino.” He pressed a kiss to the top of the artist’s head. “Thank you.”

For several long minutes, Mino cried: for the loss of a friend, for his brother losing the love of his life, for the possibility that he might lose his brother. It was all too much for the young man to bear on his broad shoulders; he was afraid. Then, with a hiccup, he slowly sat up. But, he could not let his fear stop him. Daesung would not want him to give up on Seunghyun – he knew that in the depth of his soul. A glance down at the sheets in his arms made a frown settle on his lips. The once clean sheets were wet with tearstains; not the best set to make the bed with. Rising, he selected different sheets – a soft sky blue set that he had noticed tucked at the very bottom of the stack. He did not know why, but he thought the bright color might help Seunghyun. Mino then carefully – and reverently – made the bed.

Having a sudden idea, Daesung told the young man, “My cologne is still on the dresser.”

Without further prompting, Mino crossed to the dresser and picked up the unfamiliar bottle that held the last of Daesung’s cologne. (He had used Seunghyun’s cologne plenty of times as a teenager and so knew which bottle was Daesung’s.) He weighted the glass container thoughtfully in his hand before slowly moving to stand beside the bed. A few careful spritzes of the cologne were all it took to make the room smell softly of Daesung – as though he had just walked out of the room. The bottle was then returned to its rightful place back on the dresser, right next to Seunghyun’s.

Wiping the last traces of his tears away, Mino walked back into the living room. “Seunghyun, I brought you something special,” he said, trying to infuse his voice with a brightness he did not feel. He snagged the cupcakes and moved to sit on the ottoman in front of his brother. The treats were carefully unpacked and held up so Seunghyun could see them. “Taehyun and I thought you’d like to try his new cupcake.”

For the first time since his brother’s arrival, Seunghyun’s gaze came into focus. His umber eyes locked on the cupcakes, and for a moment it seemed as though the man was about to scream or cry or attack the helpless desserts. But, slowly, Seunghyun reached out with trembling fingers to take the double chocolate cupcake with the extra chocolate curls. He lifted it to his face and breathed deeply, as though he could absorb it through scent alone. A sigh slid past his cracked lips. “Dae…always ate the curls first,” he croaked. “He’d let them melt on his tongue, savoring each one.”

Mino took a shuddering breath. “Do you want to eat one?” Seunghyun nodded. Carefully, Mino selected a curl and placed it in his brother’s mouth.

Seunghyun’s eyes closed as he took in the familiar flavor of the rich dark chocolate. It was almost like kissing Daesung right after he had let all of the chocolate curls melt away on his tongue; Seunghyun had always stolen a kiss just so he could taste his two favorite flavors together: Daesung and chocolate. But, in that moment, his favorite flavor was missing. The chocolate felt like it was missing that key ingredient that made it sing on his tastebuds. He sniffled. “Why did he die, Mino? Why did he leave me?”

From where he stood beside Seunghyun, Daesung began to tremble. He wished he knew the answer to that question; he did not understand why it had happened to them. It seemed so pointless, he thought, to break them apart this way. Couldn’t God see that his Seunghyun needed him so much more than Heaven did?

As though echoing Daesung’s unspoken thoughts, Mino simply said, “I don’t know, Seunghyun. I don’t know.”


	5. Only In My Memories

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jiyong never wanted to be an angel.

After having made certain that Mino would stay with Seunghyun, the pair of angels returned to Heaven. (Jiyong explained that both sides were only allowed a certain amount of contact with a soul in peril – something about letting them have agency.) The moment they returned to the celestial realms, Daesung fixed Jiyong with a piercing look – one that announced it was time for the other angel to start explaining. Jiyong’s shoulders collapsed inwards as he sighed, making him look like he had folded up on himself from the weight of the burdens he bore. He then motioned with a slim, fine hand for Daesung to follow him into what appeared to be a park. Trailing after the stoic angel, Daesung took the opportunity to take a good look around. Earlier he had been so confused and upset that Heaven had been a bit of a blur. But this...this was nice. He thought Seunghyun would like the way artwork was so innate in every detail - even the curling shape of the white stone path they walked on. Even the plants seemed like they had been crafted by an artisan: The bright flowers radiated life and joy through every curve of every petal, and the towering trees seemed to be dancing as their trunks twisted up towards the high seat of the God that had made them.  _Guess the stories about Heaven being paradise are true,_ he thought to himself.

Once they were seated on a bench, which faced a sculpture of a stag that appeared to be made of glass bubbles, Jiyong cleared his throat. “You and Seunghyun… What you had while you were alive was really beautiful. It is clear that you loved him, and he loved you. But, with time you are going to learn the most important lesson this place ever taught me.” His slim, pointed tongue darted out to sweep across his bottom lip, wetting it. “Sometimes love is what destroys you.”

Sitting up a little, Daesung looked over at Jiyong. “That’s not possible,” he said simply. “Love, real love, is capable of only good.”

A tired laugh slipped past Jiyong’s lips. “Skies, you are so naïve. Are you sure you’re not ten?” He glanced at the blond out of the corner of his eye before returning his gaze to the distant figure of the sculpture. “Actually… you remind me a lot of him. Back then.” The persistent burn of Daesung’s gaze urged the man to continue. “T-Taeyang – that demon – I knew him when we were alive. But, back then, he went by his given name, Dong Youngbae.” The air around Jiyong began to shimmer slightly as he remembered the bright young man who had been his best friend. When Daesung looked around, he realized they were sitting in a different park, an Earthly one, near a playground. “I was six when I met him,” Jiyong explained. He pointed to where a little boy ran wildly across the playground, heading for the swings. At that moment, another boy slid down the slide (standing up) and was launched off at the bottom – causing him to crash into the one headed for the swings. The littler boy crumpled beneath the weight of the other, and they both began to cry in force. Jiyong’s lips almost twitched into a smile. “I gave him a scar from knocking him over. My foot somehow managed to collide with his brow. But, once the bleeding stopped, we became best friends. Our mothers began to joke that we were just one person in two bodies; we lived for each other.

“As we grew up, Younbae became my guardian angel.” Jiyong gave a lazy flick of his hand, and the scene shifted to a schoolyard. A young Jiyong was in the midst of being shoved around by a group of older boys when a small figure shoved his way into the circle. Youngbae – the tallest thing about him the mowhawk he was sporting – glared the guys down. There was something about the intensity of his stare that unnerved the bullies, making them break away with a last crass warning. “Some days I let him, and other days-” The younger Jiyong pushed past Youngbae and swung at the leader of the bullies, “-not so much.” Another wave of the hand took them to the park, where Youngbae was quietly holding an ice pack up to Jiyong's black eye. And, slowly, scenes of the boys growing up – spending time together in the park – moved before their gazes.

Something in Daesung’s features softened as he watched the pair slowly begin to grow up before their eyes. But, as the two boys aged, the park began to change. Rather than the bright home of laughter, it became full of garbage and the playground was soon caked in graffiti. “Youngbae was so much like you: kind, naïve, loyal, forgiving… I honestly don’t know why he put up with me. I was so arrogant, so self-absorbed, so cruel.” Jiyong’s mouth became a hard line as the thirteen-year-old Jiyong sauntered into view, his pants hanging low and a bandana wrapped around his head. “At thirteen I decided that I had to become wealthy. I was obsessed with money because my family was so poor, and I did not want to be my father – drinking myself to death every day after work. So, I did the only thing you could in my neighborhood to get rich: I joined a gang. And Youngbae followed me, thinking he could protect me.” Jiyong sighed. “The stupid kid should’ve just let me fall. I deserved it.”

After a moment of hesitation, Daesung placed his hand lightly on Jiyong’s knee. “He probably didn’t think you deserved it. He clearly cared about you a great deal.”

“I know.” Jiyong shrugged. “That makes it worse. He believed in me, no matter how much I tried to show him that was a mistake.”

A thoughtful frown turned Daesung’s lips. The more he knew about Jiyong, the less he understood why the man had been allowed to be an angel. If he had been selfish, cruel, and a member of a gang, didn’t that go against what angels were supposed to be? Daesung was beginning to think getting into Heaven was a lottery: They randomly decided when you showed up if you were going up or down.

“When we joined the gang, we had to take on street names. Our boss, for whatever reason, thought they made us real gangsters.” Jiyong scoffed a little. “So I became G-Dragon and Youngbae…Youngbae became Taeyang. He hated the name – he’d rather go by Youngbae – but he put up with it for my sake. I even got him a necklace with Taeyang written on it in rhinestones, because I thought it’d make him like the name more. I think it may have done the exact opposite.”

Another flick of the hand brought the boys closer to adulthood. Jiyong was significantly different: wiry, tall, beautiful. Youngbae, surprisingly, was much the same – just more muscular. They were an odd pair together, a mess of contradictions, but Daesung thought it somehow looked right. Like they belonged. Except that Jiyong was sneering as another man approached them while Youngbae managed a polite smile. The sneer was calculated and cold, like Jiyong was figuring out how to cut the man in front of him.

“By sixteen I had my own little drug ring started,” Jiyong murmured. “I was rising fast in the ranks of the gang – meteoric – and with that came the wealth I dreamed of. And as I rose, Youngbae trailed along behind me, like fire after a comet. He became my bodyguard in a more literal sense than when we were in primary school. Back then it had been bruises, but it became attempts on my life.”

The older angel sat back on the bench and ran a hand through his black and white mane of hair. “I began doing anything and anyone that came my way. And Youngbae, like a silent shadow, was there to make sure I didn’t die doing anything too stupid. It was on one of those nights – when I was completely drunk…and probably a bit high – that I ruined him.” Jiyong gestured to the scene before them, his expression suddenly tight.

An eighteen-year-old Jiyong was stumbling up the middle of an empty street at three in the morning even as Youngbae walked a few steps behind him. Suddenly, the taller boy tripped and fell into a giggle pile of limbs on the asphalt. Youngbae sighed – sounding nearly exactly how Daesung did every time Jiyong frustrated him. Stooping, he pulled Jiyong up and threaded the boy’s arm around his neck. Jiyong hiccupped. “Thank you, Bae Bae,” he teased, the words slurring together.

“Mmhm.”

As they walked along, Jiyong seemed to be thinking about something. His normally masked features were alive with a myriad of expressions even as the wheels in his alcohol-addled mind tried to turn. Then, stopping suddenly, he gaped at Youngbae. “I love you,” he said quickly. And then he screamed, “I LOVE YOU!”

Youngbae winced and reached up to clamp a hand over Jiyong’s mouth. “Yeah, yeah. I know. I love you too, Ji.” Daesung liked the sound of his voice, it was warmer than he had expected.

Jiyong peeled Youngbae’s hand from his mouth. “No. I mean like, I really love you,” Jiyong whined. “Like if you cut open my chest and looked at my heart, your name would be written there.” A bony finger tapped over the left side of his breast for emphasis.

The shorter boy watched his friend closely. “Ji, you’re drunk. We should go h-“ Rather than listen to Youngbae’s nagging, Jiyong leaned in and sealed his mouth over his friend’s in a sloppy kiss. Youngbae froze.

“That was his first kiss,” Jiyong said with a bit of a smile. “He never let me live it down that his first kiss was taken by a drunk…and that I confessed to him in that state. But it was the start of something beautiful. For a time.” His gaze fell to rest on the broken shape of a pothole in the street. “We were in love – so in love. I told him I would give up anything to be with him; and, he asked me if I would give up the gang. But I was too selfish. Leaving the gang meant being poor, meant scraping for a living, meant hating every day of my life. He was hurt by my answer, but even that didn’t chase him away.”

Again, Jiyong licked his bottom lip, and he waved an impatient hand. “By the time we were in our twenties, I was second to only the boss. But that power meant I had a lot of enemies. Enemies that wanted to hurt me the way I had hurt them.” He sighed. “Youngbae did his best to keep me in line – to keep me from going too deep. I never became a murderer, at least. But my sins were practically a novel as far as the other six sins went.” The lack of passion in Jiyong’s voice made it seem like his state as the condemned sinner was so confirmed, so ingrained that the older angel could not be bothered to care anymore. It was fact rather than the past. “And then it happened. I died.”

Daesung pulled his gaze away in time to see Youngbae and Jiyong caught up in what appeared to be a nasty fight. He frowned as Jiyong reeled back from a particularly fierce punch, and the man stumbled back into the wall. The brief lull caused Jiyong to look towards the light of his life, and his features became pale. There, standing just behind Youngbae, was a man with a knife. As the hand drew back, Jiyong shoved himself off the wall and slammed his best friend out of the way. The knife pressed against flesh: hesitating for a moment before muscle and skin gave beneath the piercing pressure of the blade. Jiyong gasped as it pierced his lung, and bright blood stained the grimy white t-shirt he wore. In mere moments, the room was empty but for Jiyong and Youngbae.

In a rush, Youngbae gathered Jiyong into his arms and eased him down to lay on the ground. One of his wide, calloused hands clapped over the wound in his lover’s side. “Ji,” he gasped. “Come on, Ji. This ain’t nothing. Come on, love, you got to – to –“

Jiyong coughed, blood coming up with the motion. “To what?” he grumbled. His gaze flickered up to rest on Youngbae’s face. “Can you-“

“I’ll get help, Ji, and then you’ll be fine. You got enough to cover the medical bills, we just got to get you to the hos-“

“-Youngbae!” Jiyong began to cough again, making the light of his life fall still. “Please… Kiss me.” Youngbae gaped down at the man in his arms, who was becoming paler by the moment. “I need to feel you…one last time.” Tears pattered against Jiyong’s cheeks as Youngbae leaned down, sealing his lips over Jiyong’s and tasting the sickly iron taste of blood. When their lips parted, Jiyong sighed and murmured, “I…”

“Love you,” Youngbae breathed, finishing the sentence his lover could not. And then he began to wail.

Daesung turned his face away so Jiyong could not see the tears gathered in his eyes. “There is one thing I don’t understand,” he said slowly.

“What’s that?” Jiyong’s voice was void of emotion, making Daesung wonder if he handled pain the way Ji-Hyo did.

“If you were that awful…How did you end up an angel?”

Jiyong laughed tiredly. “Apparently selfishly giving your life for another person is one of the most noble things you can do.” He let his head hang. “I was redeemed because I sacrificed my life for the one I loved. But it was a mistake. Everything was a mistake.” Jiyong’s long, thin fingers came to frame his face. “If Youngbae had died that night, he would’ve been an angel. He was so good. And he could’ve redeemed me, and he could have trained you, and Seunghyun would be untouchable, and – and everything would be perfect,” he gasped. “But instead you get me. And they’re going to Hell and it’s my fault.” Sliding off the bench, he curled into a ball on his knees – crying with as much vigor as the heartbroken Youngbae. “I’m so sorry… so sorry…”

Not certain who Jiyong was addressing, Daesung hesitated before sliding off the bench. He wrapped his arms gently around the shaking Jiyong and held him close as he cried. When the tears finally abated, Jiyong lay quietly with his head pillowed on Daesung’s lap. “What –“ Daesung cleared his throat. “Youngbae. What happened after you died?”

Pain flickered across Jiyong’s face. “He killed the man responsible for my death. And half of his gang…before they caught up to him.” Daesung glanced up in time to see Youngbae in a fight with five larger men, and he had to look away as it became clear they were beating him to death. “When he died, there was a moment where he could see me – there always is. The last glimpse of Heaven, they say. And Seungri…Seungri began to take my Youngbae away; I had lost the fight for his soul.” Jiyong pinched his eyes tightly shut, trying to hold back a second wave of tears. “Youngbae called my name the whole way down to Hell, and I did nothing. I wasn’t good enough to save him.”

Sighing softly, Daesung ran his hand lightly over Jiyong’s surprisingly soft hair. “I am sad that you had to go through so much sorrow in your life. And that Youngbae is where he is now.”

Jiyong seemed to be lost in his own little world as he opened his eyes, staring at the prone figure of Youngbae’s remembered corpse. “I never wanted to be an angel,” he sighed. “All I wanted was to be with him.”

“Is…there no way for that to happen? Even now?” Daesung murmured, continuing to stroke the older angel’s hair.

He shook his head slightly. “No. If I fell, we wouldn’t be together. That’s not how Hell works. Even there, we would be apart. And he’s a demon, Daesung… he’s a demon.”

An eternity seemed to pass as Daesung considered the wounded man in his lap. Jiyong could be cold and had clearly given up on himself, but Daesung could see a certain spark of goodness in him, in the way he loved so completely. A man like that must have simply lost his way; he was not innately evil. “Jiyong. Would Youngbae… would he give up on Seunghyun?”

Slowly, as though his body were made of stone rather than flesh, Jiyong pushed himself upright. The brutal scene of Youngbae’s murder melted away and was instead replaced by the heavenly park. “No,” he said at last. “He’d chase the demons down to the Gates of Hell, if he had to.”

Carefully, Daesung took Jiyong’s hands in his. “Then, please, help me fight for Seunghyun’s soul. Help me save him…for Youngbae. He would want you to stop him from destroying another soul.”

Jiyong licked his bottom lip before nodding a little. “O-okay. I will do what I can.”

“You can do a lot,” Daesung said firmly. “You know who we’re up against. And, who knows, that might be just the edge we need.”


	6. I Don't Hear Anything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even demons need training.

_Jiyong._

Closing his eyes, he could still remember what it felt like to have Jiyong’s long, thin fingers tangle lightly in the hair at the nape of his neck. The way Ji would always draw in a slow breath, making his thin chest puff out, as he leaned close to Youngbae – like he was trying to breathe his lover in. And the warm, chapped surface of Jiyong’s lips as they pressed against his; Jiyong would brush a feathery kiss before stealing something rougher, more desperate. It was like that nearly every time they had kissed, and Youngbae had loved it. In a way, he did not think he could have kissed anyone else unless they had tugged on his hair and breathed him in.

And it disgusted Taeyang.

To be so dependent on someone so utterly selfish was like loving the sun for shining: a waste. But Youngbae had been so certain that Jiyong was capable of being a decent human being – capable of seeing beyond the edge of his pretty little nose – that he had clung to the dream of living happily ever after with his best friend. Even as he lay dying, Youngbae thought of Jiyong; his last breath was dedicated to sighing out the dead man’s name. Taeyang supposed he should someday get around to thanking Jiyong for teaching Youngbae how the world really worked, for breaking all of those spun glass dreams.

Rolling his shoulders back in a languid motion, the demon paced into the wide darkness that surrounded his trainer’s residence. The stark elegance of the black building – marble – rose above the empty plain as though it dared the beholder to doubt the power of the owner. Even the doors were three times taller than they had to be, simply to overwhelm any who came crawling in to speak with the demon lord. Taeyang rolled his eyes a little. He saw no reason to be in the least bit intimidated by the overdramatic demon; it was difficult to take Seungri seriously.

When Taeyang sauntered into the throne room, Seungri looked up with a wide smile on his lips. He immediately passed his glass of wine off to a man chained to the base of his throne with thick barbed wire. “If it isn’t my favorite little trainee,” he purred, throwing his arms open wide. “Come, Taeyang. Tell Daddy Ri all about your adventures.”

Rather than going to embrace the man –  _Seungri is so strange_  – Taeyang moved to drape himself in a large chair, throwing his legs loosely over the arm. He snorted. “The baby angel finally showed up. I almost thought they weren’t going to fight me for Seunghyun.”

Seungri pouted at Taeyang’s refusal of skinship. But, tossing it off with a grand gesture, he swaggered down to lean up against the stone table in front of Taeyang’s chosen seat. “If the trainee was Seunghyun’s lover – the ugly kid – then he needed time to transition. There’s something about becoming an angel that apparently takes time.” He shrugged. “And different angels take longer than others. Something to do with their hierarchy.”

Taeyang gave Seungri a flat look. “Daesung.”

“Yeah, that one.” Seungri nodded. “The ugly kid.”

The younger demon just resisted kicking Seungri’s kneecap. Instead, he said, “And you’d never believe who was with him.” A cold smile twisted his features, marring the handsomeness of his face.

All of the playfulness vanished from Seungri’s expression – replaced by a calculating hardness. “Oh?”

“Yeah.” Taeyang shrugged. “Jiyong sat there like a pitiful baby telling Daesung they should just leave.” He began to pop his knuckles. “Same old, same old.”  _Jiyong’s going to abandon the baby angel and his stupid lover just like he abandoned me. Surprise, surprise._

Seungri gazed thoughtfully at the floor as though he were reading omens written in the red swirls in the black stone. “Interesting. He is who I would have least expected. Jaejoong or even Jinwoo would be a safer choice. They’re at least competent.” Watching Seungri think, Taeyang could tell the demon was trying to crack the puzzling choice of angels. Jiyong was known for losing souls and breaking the angels he worked with; he had not been assigned a case in some time. To pair Jiyong with someone like Daesung was odd, to say the least. There had to be some trick to it.

“Yeah, but the baby angel… He’s weird,” Taeyang mused. “Maybe that’s why they’re paired together.”

Seungri immediately looked up. “Weird? How so?”

Running a hand through his hair, Taeyang tried to recall how it felt to be around the newest little guardian angel. “Well, he threatened me for one. That was different. Angels are normally sunshine and rainbows and pacifism” He hesitated. “And…it was hard to look at him for too long. He wasn’t dim, like Jiyong.”

One of Seungri’s thick eyebrows arched. “Fascinating. It’s not hard to be brighter than Jiyong, as far as angels go. If he hadn’t died saving your pitiful life, he would have been a high ranking demon lord. It’s a wonder he doesn’t just fall and take his rightful place in Hell. You’re probably just not used to how normal angels are; you’ve not seen many of them up close.” Seungri dismissed the situation with a wave of the hand. “But that’s no issue. Why don’t you tell me what you were thinking of doing to Seunghyun next. You’ve already made good progress with him.”

As the demons and angels discussed their respective plans of attack, Mino helped his brother into bed. Seunghyun hesitated at the sight of the soft blue sheets, and he carefully ran a palm over the silky fabric. “Where did you find these?” he asked, his voice raw from too many tears.

“In the closet.” Mino frowned a little. “Is there something wrong with them?”

Leaning down, Seunghyun pressed his face into the fabric and took a deep breath. The cedar wood scent of Daesung’s cologne clung to the sheets, making it seem like the blond had been there only moments before. He sighed. “No.” Sitting up a little, Seunghyun licked his lips. “These were the first sheets we bought together. Called them our honeymoon sheets. I thought..they’d gotten lost. He hadn’t made the bed with them since our last anniversary.”

“Oh.” Mino ran a hand over the top of his head. “Well, they were just in the closet. Maybe he was just…keeping them from getting worn out?”

Seunghyun nodded slowly. “Yeah.”  _Or maybe he was falling out of love with me. Maybe they were no longer special to him._ The dark thoughts had been popping up more often in Seunghyun’s mind, chewing at him like a pair of giant black dogs. It became easier and easier to think that maybe Daesung had never loved him or that the man had been falling out of love with him. After all, why would someone so perfect want a screw up like Seunghyun? The man was a walking mistake; he did not deserve the blond haired angel. Never had, never would. And there was a sort of aching peace in coming to accept that Daesung would have left him, even if he had not died.

Mino cleared his throat. “I’ve got to go to an exhibit that’s opening tonight. Did… you want to come? Ji-Hyo will be there.”

Seunghyun shook his head a little. “No. But…tell her I said hello,” the man murmured. “Maybe – maybe next time.”

A bit of a smile managed to find its way to Mino’s lips – it sounded like Seunghyun was getting at least a little better. “Can I come back tomorrow to see you?” The brunette hesitated before nodding. “Do you have a spare key I can take with me? I don’t want to wake you up if you’re sleeping when I come.”

Seunghyun twisted his fingers in the flat sheet. “In the bowl on the dresser.”

Going over to the dresser, Mino quickly found the keys. He pulled them out and weighted them in his hand, eyes fixed on the little angel wing keychain attached to it. Daesung’s keys. “I’ll take good care of them,” he promised. “And I’ll bring breakfast with me when I come. You want a coffee, too?” Seunghyun silently shrugged. “Well… I’ll be back. Make sure to eat dinner. I left some takeout menus on the counter, in case you didn’t feel like cooking.” When his brother did not answer, Mino slipped out of the apartment and into the night. Ji-Hyo would be glad to hear that he had at least managed to speak to Seunghyun.


	7. I Regret

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The angels begin to rally.

Taeyang considered his target with a thoughtful frown. If he was going to be successful in stealing away Seunghyun’s soul, then he was going to have to do something about that baby angel. His frown deepened. But what to do? How could he make the little baby angel willingly turn his back on Seunghyun. And then his cold, dark eyes glittered. Jiyong was still his perfect muse. Nothing cured a fool of their love quite like a shattered heart.

It was the oldest trick in the book: sound like an angel. Humans were so easy to deceive if they thought that a suggestion would truly benefit them, and angel were usually the sole source of such uplifting insight. But, all it took was a little twist for beautiful words to become the first steps on the journey downwards. Going to Seunghyun, Taeyang rubbed his hands together gleefully before pressing his fingertips lightly to the back of the man’s neck. “Mino would be so proud of you if you managed to go out,” he murmured. “Hasn’t he told you that you need to be social again?”

Seunghyun stirred a little. Over the past few months, he had become familiar with the feel of Taeyang’s suggestions – more susceptible to the honey of his voice. And this suggestion seemed so innocuous – just go socialize – that even the baby angel would not have protested. The human gently teased his fingers against the surface of the coverlet before slowly pushing it down to tangle at his feet. “Good boy,” Taeyang drawled. Seunghyun slowly lurched to his feet, his body rocking at the unfamiliar task of holding his weight, before shuffling to the closet. He hesitated, hand outstretched towards the selection of button downs and sweaters hanging there. Slinking up behind him, the demon curled his arms about the man’s waist and smirked into his shoulder blade. “A social drink would be nice, wouldn’t it? It’d still be going out, and Mino threw away all of the booze. It's a win-win, really.” Seunghyun’s fingers closed around the hanger that held a black dress shirt.

When the man arrived at the club Taeyang had directed him to, he hesitated at the pulsing cacophony of the music and the choking heat of too many bodies pressed together. His shoulders curled in towards his body as he pushed through the crowd towards the refuge of the bar. Taking a seat on the stool at the end, he sighed and tried to focus on the menu posted on a placard at his elbow. He quickly gave up and ordered a whiskey; sometimes wine was not strong enough. Taeyang watched him pour several of those down his throat before deciding to enact the second phase of his plan. It took him a few minutes to find a suitable candidate, but oh she was fine. Full bust, tiny waist, pouty lips – a tribute to the silicon masters. Brushing against her, he pointed out the lonely, attractive man at the bar and murmued, "Go get him."

She did not even hesitate in her approach.

The demon laughed easily as she sidled up to Seunghyun and traced her fingers along the back of his arm. Seunghyun did not spare her so much as a glance, instead choosing to inhale his whiskey. But, oh, she was just as persistent as Taeyang had hoped. She flirted, she stroked, he even grabbed like a pro. Walking closer, Taeyang noted the glassiness of Seunghyun's eyes and the way he swayed a little in his seat. There was even a flush working up the back of his neck, as though the room was beginning to grow too hot. "Come on, Seunghyun," he murmured. "Give in. This'll be good for you." His lips melted into a smirk as Seunghyun suddenly grabbed the woman by the wrist and drug her out the small side door, into the alleyway. Slipping out into the darkness, Taeyang listened to the nearly breathless moans and grunts coming from the shadows. And, true to form, the baby angel and his trainer chose that moment to show their stupidly pretty faces. Taeyang waited with bated breath for the baby angel’s features to fall in horror as he realized just what his precious lover – his “heaven” – was doing in the darkness.

But Daesung just raised an eyebrow. “That’s one way to be social,” he mused, causing Jiyong to nearly choke behind him. Daesung’s gaze slipped over to rest on Taeyang. “Is this your doing?”

Tracing his tongue along the edge of his teeth, Taeyang considered the baby angel, who looked more bored than horrified. “What, are you upset that your lover has forgotten about you so soon? It's a shame. He must not love you as much as you thought.” It was worth a shot, he figured, to at least try the ploy. He was deeply unnerved, though, by the way the baby angel laughed.

“I can tell you didn’t do your homework,” he said easily. “But that’s okay. I forgive you for not knowing Seunghyun as well as I do.” And then the baby angel had the nerve to, of all things,  _wink_ at Taeyang. Flabbergasted, the demon looked over at Jiyong, who instinctively gave him an equally confused shrug in return. The moment the pair realized what they had done, though, their gazes slammed back to rest on Daesung. “He hasn’t forgotten me at all. If anything, this says how much he misses me.” Daesung shook his head a little.

"Excuse me?" Taeyang could not help the incredulous look he shot the little angel.

Daesung flashed him a wide smile, his eyes turning into crescents with the motion. "He misses me. And I am grateful you were able to remind me of that."

"You - what?" Again, Taeyang and Jiyong exchanged confused looks. "Jiyong, did you drop the baby angel on his head or something? He's lost his mind."

Jiyong was so stunned that Taeyang had said his name that the angel froze. His wide, dark eyes remained fixed on the demon for several long moments before Daesung began to laugh agan. Suddenly serious, the blond angel cut in: “Taeyang… Youngbae… You know, you don’t have to do this. You don’t have to drag him down.”

This time, Taeyang took a step back. “Don’t call me that,” he hissed.

“Why not?” Daesung blinked at him, his tiny eyes making him seem like the picture of childlike innocence. “Youngbae is your name.”

Flames began to crackle into life around Taeyang’s clenched fist as he glared the baby angel down. “Not anymore it ain’t,” he growled. “Call me that again, and I’ll end you.” His voice was a surprisingly low growl, which made Jiyong shudder. He remembered what that voice had meant when Youngbae had used it. Typically that voice was followed by broken limbs and bloody noses. But, Daesung did not know just how much peril he was in.

Stepping closer to him, effectively closing the distance, Daesung reached out and gently curled his hand around Taeyang’s fist. The flames sighed out of existence, and the demon began to shake. Their gazes met, and Daesung stared deeply into the demon's eyes. “Youngbae, please stop hurting Seunghyun. Let him go.”

Daesung crashed into Jiyong, causing both angels to land heavily against the wall. When they looked up, Taeyang had vanished. Jiyong snorted. “Good job, baby angel. I think you’ve made the demon even madder.”

The blond laughed a little. “Oh, I don’t know, I think that went pretty well.” He shrugged loosely before throwing an arm around Jiyong’s shoulders. “After all, he didn’t end me like he said he would. That’s something, right?”

“I hate your optimism,” Jiyong deadpanned. “So much.”

“Aw, that’s a shame, Ji.” Daesung gave his shoulders a squeeze. “Because my optimism just loves you and your shining personality.”

A tiny bit of a smile managed to flicker across Jiyong’s lips before he smothered it. “You are so ridiculous.”

The distinct keening of a moan drew both angel’s attention back towards the pair rutting in the alley. Jiyong made a face. “That is so unsanitary.” His gaze snapped up to rest on Daesung’s face. “Are you...really okay?”

Leaving his arm around Jiyong’s shoulder, Daesung began to pull the other angel towards the alley’s exist. “Do you remember how I met Seunghyun?” Jiyong nodded easily. “What I didn’t tell you was that it took us months after that to actually manage to date. Seunghyun – bless him – was horrible at relationships. Something about being in love with just one person for the rest of his life terrified him. So, he refused to let anyone get too close. The day after our first date he went on a date with Onew and the day after that with Chaerin and the day after that with Minzy and Dara.” He shook his head. “I think Seunghyun was on a personal mission to sleep with the entire university before he graduated. I mean, during our first date he propositioned me at least six different times. I couldn’t even handle how ridiculous the situation was; I was the first person who had turned him down.”

Jiyong’s smile began to creep back onto his lips. “Sounds like he was as bad as I was.”

“Oh, skies, even the thought of you two teaming up is enough to give me nightmares. You would have been absolute trouble together.” Daesung shook his head, sighing dramatically. “Seunghyun was a mess. An adorable mess, but still a mess. I think, though, that Seunghyun had simply been waiting for someone who wanted him for more than his looks - someone who would accept him for exactly who he was. I think he came to realize that I was that person, because when we'd go out I would actually listen to him when he talked; not many people really listen anymore. When I would plan dates, I always based them on things I knew he liked - like going out for designer ice cream or going to a museum - in order to show him that I was paying attention. It got to the point where we were going out nearly every week, and he started to let me get close to him. Our relationship moved slowly, because he wasn't ready to let me all the way in and I wasn't ready to be too physical. Everyone teased us mercilessly.But, it got to the point he was dating me and sleeping with a different girl each week. It drove me nuts. When I asked him why he did that, he looked me in the eye and said, ‘Daesung, girls could never capture my heart. They’re just a way to keep myself occupied until you’re ready for more.’”

Jiyong snorted. “Seriously?”

The blond laughed easily. “The sad thing is that Seunghyun was completely serious. That’s why him being with a woman just…doesn’t worry me. It means Seunghyun is coping in the only way he knows how – just like the drinking. He doesn't get emotionally invested in women, it's purely sexual.”

There was a long silence as the pair continued to walk down the busy streets of Seoul. “Your relationship is so messed up,” Jiyong decided at last.

“In some ways, I guess. Once we were officially boyfriends, he gave up his girls, though. He wanted to be faithful to me, because he knows how important monogamy is to me.” Daesung’s gaze fell. “He might be a bit crazy, but Seunghyun has a good heart.”

“I think crazy is the least of words,” Jiyong muttered. But, as though sensing that Daesung was becoming distracted, he elbowed the young angel. “So, what’s our counterattack going to be. You know Youngbae isn’t going to just give up because you asked nicely.”

Rubbing his side with a rueful smile, Daesung shrugged. “It was worth a shot, though? And a guy can always dream.” His steps slowed. “What’s Youngbae like when he’s mad?”

“Pissy,” Jiyong answered immediately. “But he’s not the type to get up in your face – not really. He barks more than he bites. More likely to do something behind your back or make an underhanded jab than come from the front.”

Daesung nodded slowly. “I think that gives me an idea of what we need to do, because I bet he’s not changed that much.” He clapped his hands together. “Right, I need to go talk to Ji-Hyo. You, meanwhile, need to check on Mino. See if you can’t, I don’t know, make something good happen in his life.”

Jiyong sputtered at that command, “G-good? What do you mean by that?”

“Use your imagination, Jiyong,” Daesung teased. “I know you’ve got one. I’ve heard the way you used to swear.” And with a wink, the blond angel was gone.

“Swearing and making good things happen are two totally different things,” Jiyong called to the darkness. He could swear he could hear Daesung laughing at him.

Blowing a rogue bit of white hair out of his eyes, Jiyong focused on the artist and suddenly found himself standing…in front of a bakery? Jiyong blinked. In his personal experience, bakeries were generally not open that late in the evening; but, the NamCat Bakery was apparently not like other places in Seoul. Not only was the store still open, but it was full of people munching on cupcakes, macaroons, shortbread, pie, cookies, and – Jiyong felt his mouth begin to water – even linzer tarts with delicate latticework tops.  _This is what Heaven is supposed to be like,_ the angel thought. Stepping into the bakery, Jiyong breathed in the sugary scent of the baked goods with a bit of a smile. Clearly, he had the better mission between him and Daesung. Bakeries were so much better than art galleries. And then he noticed the distinct sound of someone singing. The angel turned towards the corner of the shop, where a small stage featured a young man with a guitar singing his heart out. Jiyong blinked – again. And then a full, gummy smile broke out over his normally stoic features. He may have even giggled a little. “I love whoever owns this place,” he declared firmly.

Twisting, Jiyong scanned the crowd for the tan skin and broodingly intense gaze of the younger Choi. He was surprised to find him standing behind the counter, leaning easily against the tile wall, talking to a person stooping to grab something from beneath the work station. Jiyong snuck closer just in time to catch the way Mino’s gaze trailed down the figure’s back and came to rest on the rather flat behind of the baker himself.  _Something good, eh?_ Jiyong thought with a smirk. Daesung would be so proud of him for coming up with an answer so quickly.

When Taehyun stood up once more, Mino innocently returned his gaze to the man’s pretty face. “The amount of frosting I go through is a bit ridiculous,” Taehyun huffed, pouting a little.

“You need to stop making everything so delicious,” Mino teased, reaching over to poke the baker’s arm. His hand was immediately smacked, making him laugh. “What? It’s the truth! If the frosting weren’t delicious, you wouldn’t go through so much of it.” His dark eyes glittered at the sight of the smile curling the edge of Taehyun’s lips.

“If you aren’t careful, I will make sure to pour salt on anything you get here in the future. Seunghyun will have to come here himself if he ever wants a delicious treat.” Taehyun playfully stuck his nose into the air and looked off towards where Seungyoon was crooning a ballad.

Jiyong smirked. “This is way too easy,” he decided. Reaching over, he put a hand on Mino’s shoulder. “You should make a move. He's clearly interested in you.”

Mino licked his bottom lip as he considered the baker’s fine profile. “Aw, Taehyun. If you want to be delicious, I’ll let you.” Taehyun’s dark eyes snapped to meet Mino’s gaze. “But…you got to give me something in return for my generosity.”

Popping a hip out, Taehyun planted a fist on it and raised a droopy brow. “Oh? What’s that?”

The more muscular man pushed off the wall and stepped closer to Taehyun. He hesitated a moment before holding out a hand. “Can I have this dance?”

A war seemed to break out on Taehyun’s face: Delight and regret battled for dominance before the man silently hung his head. “I..wish I could,” he murmured. “But I’m, uh, kind of seeing someone.”

Mino and Jiyong unwittingly had twin expressions of shock on their faces. The brunette recovered first and took a step back. “Oh. I’m s-sorry,” he stuttered. “I hadn’t realized you were with someone. I, uh –“

“It’s okay, Mino. I’m not at all – I mean.” Taehyun ran a hand through his long chestnut hair. “I really wish I could dance with you. I don’t think I’ve met anyone so caring and funny before. You seem like a really fantastic guy.”

An awkward, stilted laugh slid past Mino’s lips. “Thanks, I guess.”

Taehyun shrugged. “I – can we be friends, maybe?”

Jiyong reached out to place a comforting hand on Mino’s shoulder. The artist cleared his throat and managed to give the baker a wide, toothy grin. “Sure. If you’re willing to keep me around.” But Jiyong could hear the pain lacing his voice; poor baby Choi had really fallen for the sassy man. It was kind of like watching a puppy have a steak ripped out of its mouth only to be replaced by a shriveled piece of jerky.

But, Taehyun nodded eagerly. “Of course I want to keep you around. And you’re still supposed to coax Seunghyun here to visit me. I miss your brother lurking at the corner table. It feels weird having someone else sit there come Saturday morning.”

Latching onto the subject of his brother, Mino quickly steered the conversation away from the disaster that had just unfolded. But, in the back corner of his mind, he could not help wondering just what sort of person Taehyun was dating. Were they handsome? Beautiful? Definitely fashionable, if Taehyun’s neat appearance, even at work, was anything to go by. Probably a hundred times better than a grubby artist who loved oversized jerseys and backwards snapbacks, Mino decided with a sigh. Jiyong, meanwhile, was scowling up a storm at the baker. The man just had to ruin his perfect, beautiful plan. 

Daesung was having much better luck with Ji-Hyo.

He found his sister sitting in the office at the gallery, staring blankly at her computer screen. The background was a picture of her and Daesung – their lips tugged into matching grins and their fingers poking each other’s cheeks. She seemed to be remembering that day; they had gone to the amusement park to celebrate her gallery opening. Daesung smiled a little to himself, thinking of how she had drug him onto rollercoasters and had laughed at his screaming. He had retaliated by making her play games with him, which she did horribly at; but, she had loved the fluffy unicorn Daesung had won. In fact, that silly stuffed animal was still seated in a place of honor on the shelf above her desk.

With a soft creak of leather, she leaned back in her chair and sighed. “Dae-ah,” she murmured, “I miss you.” She sniffed hard, making her nose crinkle.

Daesung carefully sat down on the edge of her desk and reached forward to take her hands in his. “Ji-Hyo,” he murmured, warmth and affection coloring the word, “I miss you too. But it’s okay. I’m with you still.” He leaned forward to press a light kiss to the smooth surface of her cheek.

She sighed softly. “Sometimes it feels like you’re still here with me. And I’m not sure if that’s because I never thought of a world without you in it or because… because you’re still out there somewhere.” Her eyes slid shut as tears began to gather in her beautiful eyes. “Here you go again, making me cry.”

“Don’t cry, Ji-Hyo.” Daesung gave her hands a squeeze. “I need you to do something for me.” He could sense more than see his sister tuning into his voice. “The gallery will need a new exhibit soon. You should do one about heaven – like that song Junsu has been working on. Please, Ji-Hyo. For me.”

His sister’s gaze slowly rose from the lip of the desk, seeming to skate up to rest on the desktop image once more. But, then it continued to rise – stopping on his face. For a brief moment, he saw her eyes light up. Could she see him? His breath caught when she suddenly surged to her feet and reach out towards him. And then she hesitated – hand outstretched. Daesung carefully reached out to line his palm up with hers, sighing at the soft warmth of his sister’s hand.

“Daesung,” she sighed softly. “I need to do an exhibit to celebrate Daesung.” Then, as though the vision of her brother had vanished, she turned and grabbed her phone. “Junsu. I need you here at the gallery – bring the sheet music for the song you’ve been working on in honor of Jaejoong.” She hesitated. “I’ll explain when you get here.”

The angel trailed along behind his sister as she rushed into the studio and prepared a large sheet of sketch paper. An exhibit in his honor was not precisely what he had in mind, but he was curious just what she would do. His sister often took inspiration from seemingly random things only to make the most amazing exhbits. While he thought about the nature of his sister's work, Ji-Hyo pulled out the keyboard she kept in the corner for Junsu. Some of her favorite dates with her fiancé were ones where he would sit in the corner composing while she sat drawing. By the time Junsu arrived – looking rather out of breath – Ji-Hyo had already begun to sketch. Her pencil was moving furiously over the paper as she fought to capture the image she had seen for too brief a moment. Rather than kiss her hello, Junsu walked over to the keyboard and began to set the sheet music on the stand. He knew better than to interrupt her when she had her tongue sticking out of the corner of her mouth; it was a sign she was entrenched in her work. “Are you sure you want to hear this one? It’s not finished yet.”

Ji-Hyo nodded. “Yes. I need to hear it. It fits.” Junsu sighed and carefully lifted his fingers. He then began to play the light, almost fluttering, tune to the song he had been working on as a memoriam for his childhood best friend. Daesung frowned at the memory. Jaejoong had died at just twenty from a rare form of cancer, and Junsu had been absolutely distraught at the loss of his dearest friend. It had taken the quieter man years to be able to cope with his grief and begin working on this particular song. But, it was haunted with a raw sort of passion, that need to have a loved one stay.

When Daesung looked up, he was surprised to find another angel in the room. His eyes widened a little at the sight of an almost painfully beautiful face set with intense eyes, a broad nose, and wide, thin lips. He had been in the presence of perfection before – he had spent several years waking up to Seunghyun every morning, after all – but this man was a brand of beauty Daesung had not experienced in person before. After a long moment, Daesung managed a little bow. “Hello.”

“You’re Kang Daesung,” the other angel said after a moment.

“Yes, sir. I am.” Somehow it felt right to address the other angel with a title of respect. He seemed to radiate a power and control that Jiyong, for all his charm, did not have. 

The other angel nodded slowly, the movement strangely sensual. “I’m Kim Jaejoong.” Daesung’s eyes went as wide as they could and his mouth fell a little open. This ethereal creature before him was the same sickly young man that had introduced Ji-Hyo to the love of her life? The transformation was startling, to say the least. Jaejoong seemed to be watching him closely iin return, as though he were equally fascinated by the changes time had wrought. “Are you here checking on your sister?”

“No,” Daesung murmured, blinking out of his stupor. “Um, I’m getting her help. With my assignment.”

“Ah.” Jaejoong nodded. “Choi Seunghyun. I had hoped they would make me your trainer.” It made Daesung wonder if everyone in Heaven knew about his assignment; he even got asked about Seunghyun when just walking down the streets of Heaven. But to hear that Jaejoong had wanted to be his trainer... The blond could not help but imagine how different it would have been to have an angel who knew his family helping him, someone who clearly was a powerful angel based on the radiance he gave off. And Daesung felt guilty. Jiyong might not light up a room when he walked in, but he was a good man with a surprisingly tender heart. Daesung had to believe that he had been assigned to Jiyong because the other angel was the best man for the job. 

Licking his lip, Daesung ducked his head a little as he fought for the right thing to say. “Junsu and Ji-Hyo told me a lot about you, but I don’t think we ever properly met. Except that once when I nearly ran you over on the stairs.”

Jaejoong laughed a little. “I remember that. You were all arms and legs, then. Couldn’t have been more than ten.” Daesung had been entirely awkward as a child, and Ji-Hyo had frequently been embarrassed by him while they were growing up. She had purposely avoided bringing her friends anywhere near her 'dorky younger brother' for fear he would cause some catastrophe. Honestly, Daesung could not blame her. The first time she had brought Junsu over, Daesung had managed to spill a slushy all over the boy. He had simply been lucky that Junsu had laughed the incident off and bought him a new slushy; Junsu was great like that. 

“Nine,” Daesung agreed easily. But then a shiver of cold dread filled his stomach. “You…aren’t here because one of them is going to die soon, are you?” His chin jerked towards Ji-Hyo and Junsu.

A soft smile turned the thin bow of Jaejoong’s lips. “No. They will have many, many years before their turn comes. I heard Junsu playing our song, and I came to listen.” He shrugged even as a hand snuck up to wrap around the back of his neck. “That’s all.”

“If you come to this side,” Daesung murmured, “you can watch Ji-Hyo sketch. Watching them work together is even better than just listening to Junsu play.”

After a moment of hesitation, the other angel moved to stand beside Daesung. Their eyes watched the strange circles and lines on the sheet of paper begin to resolve themselves into more distinct shapes. There seemed to be the curve of a lip here and a shoulder there. Slowly a broad, smooth jawline began to form under the lead of her pencil. Daesung tilted his head, though, as another shape began to rise behind the shoulders – perhaps the background? It wasn’t much longer until Jaejoong suddenly grinned. “I see.”

Daesung blinked and looked up at the slightly taller angel. “What?”

Reaching over, Jaejoong gave his shoulder a squeeze. “You’ll see later. Why don’t you go meet up with Jiyong? I will keep watch here. Whatever you’re planning seems to be well in motion.”

The blond hesitated before nodding slowly. “Thank you for taking such good care of both of them.” He stepped back and bowed deeply to the other angel. “I hope we can work together in the future.”

“If there is anything I can do to help, just let me know,” Jaejoong said simply. “I would do anything for Junsu and his family. And Daesung?"

"Yes, sir?" Jaejoong repressed a smile at the way the younger angel looked at him: attentive and ready for orders. "Remember that you are not alone in this mission. Any angel will help you if you only ask. But," he frowned, "remember that Taeyang is not alone either. You have a long fight ahead of you."

Daesung inclined his head. "I understand, and I am ready to fight. I can't give up on him."

Jaejoong at last let a full smile turn his lips. "That's the spirit."

The baby angel bowed again before disappearing with a bit of a blush on his cheeks. The older angel chuckled and gave his head a shake. “That kid. Tch.” His gaze came to rest on his best friend. "You are one lucky man, Junsu."


	8. Don't You Know How Much I Love You?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seunghyun remembers Daesung - the good, the painful, the truth.

When Taeyang returned to the jetty palace, Seungri met him at the door with a frown on his lips. “Taeyang, Taeyang,” he said, shaking his head slowly. “Whenever will you learn to read the whole dossier on a soul? If I have told you once, then I’ve told you twice: Know your client better than they know themselves.”

Taeyang snorted. “Whatever, Seungri.” He moved to push past the other man but found himself stopped by a firm hand on his chest.

“I don’t believe I was finished with you,” the demon lord murmured, his voice resounding with power. “You made a grave misstep today.”

The younger demon just resisted rolling his eyes, instead settling for brushing Seungri’s hand off his chest. “I don’t know that I’d call it that. I just made a small mistake. It’s nothing I can’t fix.”

“Oh, so you know everything now, do you?” Seungri scoffed. “Make another mistake, boy, and I will have to take your place in this mission. And if you can’t make it stealing souls, Taeyang, don’t forget what will happen to you.” Without another word, the demon pointed to the fields of torment where the (incompetent) damned were punished throughout the eternities. Taeyang’s eyes caught one particular figure: a man who was tied to a pole with barbed wire – only a small platform for his feet preventing him from sliding down its length. He winced. Even when he had been alive, Taeyang had hated barbed wire. It was too easy to imagine the way it would dig into the skin and tear muscle, rendering it into a bleeding pulp. He did not think there was anything in the world, Heaven, or Hell that would make him willngly undertake such agony; it was the stuff of his nightmares. At least being a soul reaper meant freedom and the possibility for power. 

\---

Seunghyun sat on the bed that morning, staring up at the ceiling. His mind was, for the first time in months, empty of the dark thoughts that had plagued him. It was as though pleasant white noise had taken the place of nails against a chalkboard - a relief. But it wasn't the rather questionable intimacy he had engaged in at the bar nor the alcohol that had burned through his system that had brought about the small change in him. It had been something that would have been insignificant to anyone else: a nothing.

His gaze fell to rest on the piece of paper in his hand. Everything from the bold, hurried handwriting to the blue cartoon cat on the margin pointed to the owner; Daesung loved to write his daily to-do lists on his Doraemon paper. Seunghyun had come across it while drunkenly searching for earplugs the night before, and the instant he had seen it he'd felt sober. Somehow, he had forgotten about Daesung's lists. He brushed a thumb over the list, drinking in the words for the umpteenth time.

> _1\. Buy milk, eggs, and ice cream - mint!!_
> 
> _2\. Pick up dry cleaning_
> 
> _3\. Remind Ji-Hyo about Valentine's Day_
> 
> _4\. Love Seunghyun for the rest of time_

Daesung ended every list the same way: "Love Seunghyun for the rest of time." The first time Seunghyun had noticed it, he had teased Daesung horribly, asking if he really needed reminding to love his darling boyfriend. But Daesung had surprised him. Instead of laughing, Daesung had turned very serious. "Yes," he said. "I need reminding every day. But that's because I never want there to be a day I stop loving you."

Closing his eyes, Seunghyun could easily call to mind the look on Daesung’s face that day. His full lips had been pulled into a firm line – a sure sign that he was completely in earnest – and his brows were furrowed, giving him an air of intense concentration. He had even leaned forward a little, the sunlight from the window casting part of his face into shadow as it highlighted the sharp arch of his nose and brow. Seunghyun had felt absolutely stunned that someone so good as Daesung would love him so deeply; it was as though he had been allowed to have an angel in his life. Every day – even when Daesung snored because he had a cold or they fought over not sorting the laundry right or when Daesung had a meltdown over acne – Seunghyun felt blessed to know that his beautiful blond would write “love Seunghyun for the rest of time” at the end of his list. It had been a constant he had taken for granted. Some part of Seunghyun had imagined Daesung writing that same thing on his trusty to-do list even when they were bent and withered with age, the writing made shaky by arthritis. But, that day would never come. The man only wished he had been better at letting Daesung know he was as loved in return – that he was the center of his soul.

In truth, Seunghyun thought himself bad at loving. When his parents had died in a car wreck, he had only been eighteen. He had been forced to grow up quickly and find a way to support not only himself but also Mino, who was only fifteen. They had scrambled to make ends meet, and Seunghyun had, for all intents and purposes, become a single parent. It had been so easy to get caught up in the hustle of taking care of Mino and working and trying to go to school and have some semblance of a life that love simply was not a priority. As he had gotten older, Seunghyun had begun to think that soulmates were a pitiful fairytale that people told themselves in order to feel better about their lonely lives - a way to give their suffering meaning. And "true love," he had thought, was a simpleton’s way to justify the way people tormented each other in a relationship.

But then Daesung had come into his life.

Seunghyun could remember the first time he heard Daesung’s whine of distress. He had walked into the studio – expecting to find Mino – only to be confronted with the rather amazing sight of a blond attempting to pull his hands apart. Daesung had whirled around at the sound of the door opening and held his hands out, which were stuck together as though he were praying. The light had been streaming through the large windows behind Daesung, hitting his hair in such a way that it seemed to shine. The stoic brunette had been completely stunned by the perfection of the sight… until he had realized Daesung was crying. He had felt like the worst person on the face of the planet for hurting someone so pure and innocent.

Well, who seemed so pure and innocent. Daesung had a wonderful wicked streak in him, the kind that would lead to him pulling pranks on Seunghyun or sneaking kisses in public. There had even been once where Daesung had convinced his boyfriend that making out in a dressing room was a completely appropriate thing to do during a shopping trip. It had been those little moments of impishness that had melted Seunghyun’s defenses as much as the sweetness.

Dating Daesung had been both the best and worst choice Seunghyun had ever made. He had been so certain that being with the blond would fix all of his problems; but, he had been so wrong it nearly hurt to think about the mistakes he had made. That first date with Daesung, the apology dinner, had been so much fun that it had terrified Seunghyun. His dates were never interested in actually talking to him or getting to know him; they were just there for the sex. But Daesung had not even let the brunette get in a good night kiss or hold his much abused hands. In fact, the blond had simply given him his number, thanked him for a wonderful dinner, and vanished into his apartment. Seunghyun had been flabbergasted. His next couple of dates over the following days had been routine, but he was not as satisfied by the slick contact of a body against his as he had been in the past. If anything, he was annoyed with his dates because their laugher sounded wrong or their smile wasn’t right. It had taken him a while to realize what was wrong, and he had nearly jumped off the top of the economics building when he had realized he was pining for Daesung. Choi Seunghyun did not pine.

He worked up the courage to call the blond the next week, and the man had easily agreed to an outing – this time to a local festival. Seunghyun had watched Daesung closely throughout the date, trying to figure out what made him so bewitching. Compared to Seunghyun’s endless stream of lovers, Daesung wasn’t particularly impressive. He was average height, darker skinned, hook-nosed, and squinty eyed. On paper, there was nothing to really recommend him. But, then he smiled. Daesung’s wide smile and beautiful crescent-shaped eyes could make an entire room light up. And his laugh, even when it was a high pitched giggle, was full of so much joy it almost hurt to listen to. The more time Seunghyun spent with Daesung, the more he realized that bronze skin and a larger nose were absolutely beautiful. And the full shape of Daesung’s lips made his smile more pronounced – definitely a perk – while the size of his eyes meant his eyesmile had ten times the impact. If anything, Daesung was absolutely stunning because he was a collection of features that were not traditionally beautiful but were, when together, perfection. Seunghyun would never understand how people could call Daesung ugly when he was clearly the most beautiful human being to have ever graced the face of the planet.

He sighed.

Daesung had not only been beautiful on the outside, but his heart had been the quintessence of goodness. (Ugh, he was waxing poetic again. Only Daesung could make him be that way.) But, he had to admit it was an apt description. He could remember the one, major mistake he had made in their relationship and the look of utter agony on Daesung’s face when he had found out. Seunghyun had wanted to rip out his own eyes rather than see the slight trembling of his boyfriend’s lower lip and the way he had hung his head. In that moment, Seunghyun would have understood completely if Daesung had never forgiven him; the brunette deserved his angel’s ire. But, true to form, Daesung had found a way to forgive him. Seunghyun still had no idea how they had been able to overcome that obstacle.

But more than anything, Daesung made Seunghyun want to be a better person. The brunette knew he would never be as angelic as his beloved nor even a tenth so good at being selfless; but, that didn’t mean he wasn’t better. Daesung gentled him: Seunghyun listened better and actually acknowledged his feelings. Seunghyun had even turned into something of a romantic; it had not been uncommon for him to buy Daesung little gifts or surprise him with a trip to their favorite restaurant. Once, Seunghyun had even arranged a vacation to Japan, just so Daesung could stock up on Doraemon paraphernalia and climb Mount Fuji. (Somehow Daesung had even convinced Seunghyun to go hiking with him, which was an accomplishment in and of itself.) His boyfriend had even helped smooth his relationship with Mino, which had been severely strained by the years of playing parent. In fact, Seunghyun suspected that Daesung was the reason he and Mino still spoke. And, most of all, Daesung had taught Seunghyun that it was alright to love, that it was alright to be vulnerable. He could remember the way Daesung had told him “I love you” for six straight months without hearing anything in reply – the way he had continued to repeat the confession until Seunghyun was ready to return it. Oh, and the way Daesung had smiled at him when he had finally managed to utter those three words… It had burned itself onto the fabric of his mind because it had been Daesung’s most beautiful smile. Literally, Seunghyun had never seen its equal in the years he had been with the beautiful blond. Daesung had told him that he was so perfectly happy that Seunghyun had trusted him enough to share his heart with him. 

And it made Seunghyun wonder, as he sat in the pale light of the early morning, what Daesung would think of him now. He wondered if Daesung would have cried beside him – weeping for their separation – or if he would have laughed over the overdramatic way Seunghyun had reacted. Seunghyun managed a faint laugh. He could imagine Daesung managing to do both at the same time. His thumb stroked over the piece of paper again before he rocked to his feet. Walking over to his desk, he grabbed a pen and added another item to the list in his sharp, angular handwriting:

> _5\. Love Daesung for the rest of time_

Satisfied with the addition, he carried the note with him and crawled into bed. He curled around the note, clutching it to his chest as though it were the last piece of Daesung to exist in the world. 


	9. Liar

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes the past won't just go away.

When the bell over the door let out a cheery ring, Taehyun emerged from the back of the bakery with a hair flip and a swing in his hips. The baker knew he was fabulous – perhaps just a tiny bit more fabulous than his baked goods – and loved to play the part for his customers. It was something of an inside joke at the NamCat Bakery that the only thing hotter than the ovens was the baker himself. But the sight of who was waiting for him was enough to drive all thoughts of his persona from his head.

“Seunghyun!” Taehyun took off his apron and hung it up on its trusty hook. He then slid right over the counter before all but running to catch the man in a tight hug. “It’s so good to see you!”

There was a moment before Seunghyun wrapped an arm around Taehyun’s shoulders, returning the hug. “I heard about the salt threat,” he murmured. “Sorry my brother sucks.”

“Yah!” Mino reached over to slug Seunghyun’s shoulder. “You are such a jerk. See if I come all the way downtown just to get pastries with you again,” he pretended to huff.

Releasing Taehyun, the older Choi turned to give his brother a bit of a smirk. “You’re just jealous because I’m prettier than you.” Then, true to form, he stuck his tongue out at Mino.

“Do you see what I have to put up with?” Mino whined. “Clearly, because I am such a martyr for putting up with Seunghyun, I should get really amazing pastries that aren’t covered in salt. It’s practically a community service.”

A wide smile turned Taehyun’s lips as the siblings continued to quietly bicker. “You two feel up to taste testing something for me?” That immediately got their attention. Both brothers turned to face him with matching eager expressions; if they had been puppies their ears would have been up and their tails wagging. “I thought you might. Why don’t you two sit down while I get it from the back? It’ll be a couple of minutes at least. You’re just lucky I was going to test them myself.”

Mino and Seunghyun exchanged a look before sitting down at the elder’s favorite corner table. “What do you think it is?” Mino murmured.

“I have no idea. But,” he hesitated, “I think I smell burning sugar.”

“Is that a good thing or a bad thing?”

Seunghyun shrugged. “You never know with Taehyun. Sometimes his experiments are amazing and sometimes they’re really terrible. It depends on the day.”

“Huh.” Mino nodded a little. “Good to know.” His gaze drifted back towards the kitchen, as though he were hoping for a glimpse of the baker.

His brother narrowed his eyes, watching Mino thoughtfully. “You like him, don’t you?”

Mino’s gaze snapped back to him. “What?”

“You like him, don’t you?” Seunghyun repeated. “I can tell by the way you look at him – the way you watch for him.”

The younger Choi sighed heavily. “I do like him,” he admitted. “A lot. But I don’t think I’ll ever be able to tell him that.”

Seunghyun frowned. “Why not? Would he not return your feelings? Is he straight?”

Mino shook his head. “It’s not that. He has shown interest. It’s just… he’s dating someone else right now. If I were to tell him how I felt, I worry it might lead to him breaking up with whoever he’s dating, just out of curiosity or infatuation. That wouldn’t be right. If I get with someone, I want it to be for the right reasons.”

Reaching across the table, Seunghyun gave his brother’s hand a squeeze. “You are a much better person than I am. I’d be selfish enough to try to steal him away from whoever he was dating.”

Laughing, Mino shook his head. “But you’re Choi Seunghyun. You’d be able to win him away and keep him. I’ve not got your charisma. I’m just a goofy artist, not a suave antiques dealer.”

“Anyone would be lucky to have you, Mino. Don’t sell yourself short.” Seunghyun shrugged. “Besides, he is just dating someone. Dating doesn’t mean married.”

The artist laughed easily. “True. Who knows, maybe my luck will change.” He shrugged, even as Taehyun let out a slow breath from where he stood eavesdropping in the kitchen. Just then, the bell above the door rang again as two more men entered the bakery.

“Coming,” Taehyun called. He sauntered out of the kitchen carrying his latest experiments on a tray. “Oh, hey guys. Just give me a second.” He flashed the new pair a warm smile before moving over to Seunghyun and Mino’s table. “Alright, so here we’ve got a bananas foster crème brulee and a chocolate raspberry crème brulee. Let me know what you two think. I’m considering adding them as a special order item.”

Seunghyun happily picked up his spoon. “I have a good feeling about this one, NamTae. They look amazing.”

“Yeah, thank you,” Mino said, smiling crookedly at the baker.

Taehyun laughed. “Well, hopefully they taste as good as they look. Enjoy.” He then drifted over to the two other men. The shorter of the pair caught Taehyun in a tight hug. “Yah, let me go, buffoon.” The baker lightly shoved the man, who Mino recognized from the open mic night as the singer with the guitar.

"That's not yours," the third man drawled, plucking Taehyun from the singer's arms. Mino’s breath caught, though, when the stranger - who was taller than even Taehyun - not only caught Taehyun for a hug but a kiss as well. Turning quickly around, he cracked through the top of the crème brulee with his spoon and focused on taking the first bite. Seunghyun just frowned to himself before following suit.

A few moments later, a set of shadows covered their table. The Choi brothers looked up to find a rather nervous Taehyun and his two companions standing there. “My friends wanted to meet you both, since I talk about you two so often,” he quickly explained. “I hope you don’t mind.”

Seunghyun and Mino immediately surged to their feet and bowed a little. “Of course we don’t mind,” Seunghyun murmured. “I’m Choi Seunghyun, and this is my brother Choi Mino.”

“It’s so great to meet you both!” The taller man, the one who had kissed Taehyun, said brightly before bowing. “I’m Lee Seunghoon.” His arm settled easily around Taehyun’s waist.

“And I’m Kang Seungyoon.” The singer smiled widely at them before his gaze caught on Mino's face. “Hey, weren’t you here on Saturday when I sang? I remember you lurking around here,” he said to Mino.

The brunette nodded, resettling his snapback on his head. “Yeah. I try to make most of the open mic nights. They’re good inspiration.”

“Are you a musician?” Seunghoon asked immediately. It was the first spark of interest the man had shown; he had been far too distracted by the brunette in his arms to really pay attention to the Choi brothers.

“No. Just an artist. Sometimes listening to music helps me draw.” He shrugged shyly. “Especially if it is something I’ve never heard before.”

“That is so awesome,” Seungyoon said, shaking his head. “If you ever need new music to listen to, I’m always looking for an audience.” He winked cheekily at Mino.

“You know, you three are going to confuse me,” Taehyun cut in – trying to save Mino from embarrassment. He was not particularly suave, but Mino still shot him a grateful little smile. “Seunghoon, Seungyoon, and Seunghyun. It’s like Seung-cubed.”

Seunghyun chuckled a little. “I’d say call us by our last names, but that might get confusing.” Not to mention heartbreaking, considering Seungyoon’s last name was the same as Daesung’s.

“You all just need nicknames,” Mino drawled. “Taehyun, that’s your new job. You come up with nicknames, and I will support you.” Reaching down, he snuck another bite of the crème brulee.

“They taste that good, huh?” Taehyun nodded to the treats, a smile tugging his lips.

“I may need ten of them when my birthday comes,” Mino said easily. “They’re about the best thing I’ve ever eaten. Though, the chocolate one is better. Mainly because chocolate is always better.”

As the five continued to talk, Daesung looked over at Jiyong with an upraised eyebrow. “Well, Seunghyun is out of the house. And you were right that Mino likes Taehyun.”

“Taehyun likes him back, too,” Jiyong stubbornly pointed out.

Daesung laughed a little. “I know, Jiyong. But Seunghyun’s right: He’s just dating someone else. If it’s meant to be, Taehyun will become available.”

Jiyong scoffed. “You trust fate a little too much, baby angel. It’s no wonder it took you so long to get Seunghyun to say he loved you.” Reaching over, Daesung cuffed Jiyong’s shoulder, making the older angel stumble a little. “What was that for?!”

“You were being rude,” Daesung said serenely.

The older angel rolled his eyes. “I’ll try to keep my shining personality in check,” he drawled. “So what’s the next move? Since you won’t let me just get Mino and Taehyun together like they should be.”

Daesung frowned a little. “I’m surprised we haven’t seen a push back from the demons yet. It’s actually making me nervous that it has been so quiet. I think –“

A flash of light announced the arrival of a rather harried looking Jaejoong. Almost immediately, Jiyong scowled at the more powerful angel. “What do you want, Jaejoong?”

“Daesung,” he panted, “there you are. It’s Ji-Hyo and Junsu. Your demon has been messing around with them.” Demons had the most ironic sense of timing.

The trainee exchanged a look with his mentor before they disappeared in a flash. When they arrived at Junsu’s apartment, the first thing Daesung noticed was that it was messy. Junsu was a very meticulous person – he was very much like Daesung in that way – so to see the place practically in ruins was unfathomable. And then he heard the yelling. His jaw practically scraped the floor he was so surprised by the distinct sound of Ji-Hyo cursing. “What happened? I thought you were watching them!” he snapped at Jaejoong.

Jaejoong marched back to the bedroom, where Taeyang sat smirking on the bed, watching the argument like a prize fight. “This one convinced Ji-Hyo that Junsu was cheating on her. He must’ve been quietly working on it while I was with one or the other.”

Taeyang cheekily waved at them. “Hey, baby angel. I’ve been expecting you.” He gave the bed beside him an inviting pat. “Wanna come watch? I promise I’ll make it worth your while.”

Daesung’s jaw twitched. “Youngbae,” he growled, his voice containing a dangerous enough note to it that Jiyong actually grabbed onto his arm. “Don’t you dare. Don’t you dare.”

“Already have, baby angel. And there’s nothing you can do about it.” He winked at the collection of angels even as Ji-Hyo grabbed her suitcase and stormed towards the door.

The youngest angel just about swore, but he instead focused on taking a slow breath. “Jiyong, you follow Ji-Hyo. When she’s stopped cursing, see if you can find out what he did to make her think Junsu cheated. Jaejoong, you should probably go with him. She’s going to be the harder one to crack, and you know her.”

“Dae,” Jiyong murmured. “What do you think you are going to do?”

A cold expression settled itself on Daesung’s features as his lips drew into a thin, firm line. “Youngbae and I are going to have a discussion.”

The demon wriggled his eyebrows. “Oh my. Should I start stretching now?”

Daesung calmly removed Jiyong’s hand from his arm. “I’ll be fine. And he’ll survive – don’t worry about that.”

“That’s not what I’m worried about,” Jiyong muttered. But, he decided to trust the baby angel. After all, Daesung had been doing fairly well in defending Seunghyun’s soul. The battle was a lot more even than it had been before, and the blond’s predictions had thus far proved sound. So, Jiyong quietly turned and followed after the tempestuous woman.

Jaejoong hesitated. “I am so sorry I did not notice sooner, Daesung. I’ll do everything I can to help with Ji-Hyo.” And then he too was gone.

Junsu sat, staring blankly at the still open door, as tears raced down his cheeks. He had been as blindsided as Daesung by Ji-Hyo’s accusations, and it did not even register to him that she had really walked out. That she was gone. His hands began to tremble as tears threatened to spill down his cheeks. Going to his side, Daesung placed a hand on his shoulder. “Let her calm down,” he ordered. “Then we can reason with her. She loves you, even if she’s absolutely crazy.” The fact Daesung was so cross probably did not help comfort Junsu as much as it otherwise would, but the man at least did not curl into the fetal position. Instead, Junsu just sat there – crying. Daesung rolled his eyes. He would deal with Junsu once he had gotten rid of a certain thorn in his side.

Daesung turned his attention back to the demon. “Do you actually enjoy being like this?” His eyes narrowed, disappearing into two tiny slits of ire.

“Enjoy?” Taeyang seemed to honestly consider the question. “I enjoy being free to go where I please. I enjoy not being tormented by fire and brimstone. I enjoy not wishing I could simply stop existing because the suffering is too much. So, yeah, I guess I do enjoy being like this.” He shrugged. “In Hell it’s either do unto others or suffer yourself, baby angel. I made the obvious choice.”

“The  _obvious_ choice?” Daesung snapped. “Tearing apart my sister’s life and ruining her relationship with the love of her life is the obvious choice?”

Taeyang slid off the bed. “Yeah, it was. Because you weren’t letting me close to Seunghyun, I had to do what I could to break him. And we both know how sensitive a subject cheating is for Seunghyun.”

“I think I just lied to Jiyong,” the young angel murmured. “I probably am going to destroy you.” But even as the words fell from his mouth, Daesung knew they were not true. Even if Taeyang managed to permanently separate Ji-Hyo and Junsu, Daesung was not the type of person to completely obliterate another. But, that did not mean he had to stand aside while the demon destroyed everyone he loved. “You know, it’s funny. The Youngbae I saw in Jiyong’s memories would have rather suffered than hurt others. He would’ve thought it better than having others go through what he did when he lost the love of his life. What changed?”

The demon hesitated. “I think I preferred you when you were going to tear me limb from limb,” he said, his voice quiet.

“I think that Youngbae is still in there. You know why?” Daesung advanced on the man. “Because you don’t play as dirty as you could. You push, sure, but only just enough to make it seem like things are going to break apart. But you’re heart isn’t in it – I don’t think it ever was.” His hands curled around Youngbae’s forearm, and he drew the demon close. “Sin does not make the man, Youngbae. All of those years of kindness and love still have meaning.”

Youngbae scoffed. “Tell that to Heaven, Daesung. They forgot me the moment I killed a man.”

“No they didn’t,” the blond murmured. “You forgot yourself.”

“You can’t stop what’s inevitable,” Youngbae said, his gaze fixed on the distant wall. “Seungri will have Seunghyun’s soul, no matter if I help him or not. Stop trying to convince me to give up; it’s pointless.”

Daesung considered him for a long moment, causing the demon to fidget in his grip. “I’m not going to give up,” he said firmly. “On Seunghyun… or on you.” He then released the demon – remaining close enough that Youngbae could feel the heat of his light on his skin.

“Then you’re more of a fool than I thought you were.” With that, the demon disappeared.

That evening – while out with Taehyun, Mino, and the Seung-Seung unit for drinks – Seunghyun went to the bar to get a refill on his wine. He smiled slightly at the bartender as he leaned against the worn, dark wood of the bar. Even with all of the awkwardness between Mino and Taehyun, the day had been relatively good. It was nice to spend time actually talking to people; he was starting to remember what living was like. He imagined Daesung would be proud of him for acting like an actual human being. And it helped that Mino was absolutely ridiculous – he could make the stones in the walls laugh. Taking his now full glass of wine in one hand, Seunghyun turned to head back to his table only to run into someone. He looked down, and a gasp slid past his lips. The glass slid from his numb fingers – crashing onto the floor in a shower of glass and ruby liquid. He did not even bat an eyelash.

“Seunghyun. Imagine seeing you here.”

The brunette took a steadying breath as he gazed down into the small, delicately curved eyes of the man he hated more than any other. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It bears mentioning that I own none of the gifs used throughout the fic. I am not cool enough nor talented enough to much such things.


	10. I'm Afraid I Will

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Demon Lord Seungri just can't leave things alone.

Seunghyun felt his breath catch as the other man stood up straight – their gazes nearly even. It seemed as though the years had not touched the blond; he looked exactly the same - right down to the cold light in his heartless eyes. A cold sweat broke out across the back of his neck at the smile turning the full lips of the one person he hated almost as much as the man who had killed Daesung. But, oh, if only hate were the sole emotion the blond before him inspired. “Zico.”

That feline smile grew at being recognized. “Seunghyun. Been a long time since I saw you last.” His voice was a low purr that made shudders jangle down Seunghyun’s spine. Pure fear made the bottom of Seunghyun's stomach feel as though it had fallen through the floor and all the way to purgatory.

“I wish it were longer,” he ground out, clenching his teeth as the blond leaned closer.

Zico laughed – the sound peculiarly bright. “I think you’re lying, Seunghyun. Your right eye still twitches.” His hand moved to brace against the bar, trapping the man against the hard wood. “I’m surprised you’re here alone. Handsome thing like you was always so popular in university.”

Rolling his head back, Seunghyun stared up at the distant darkness of the ceiling. He tried to take a steadying breath, but it did him little good. If anything, it brought the cloying sweetness of Zico's cologne deep into his lungs, reminding the brunette of things he had hoped to forget. “I’m not here alone. In fact, I should really get back to them.”

Zico tilted his head, considering him. “Not here alone…but not with a date.” He smirked. “I can fix that, you know.”

“I’m out drinking with friends,” Seunghyun said firmly. “I don’t need a date.” Finally peeling himself off the bar, the brunette pushed past the other man and stalked towards the distant table where his brother sat laughing.

When Seunghyun stormed over, Mino raised an eyebrow at the near murderous expression on his brother’s face. “What’s wrong?” A quick glance assured him that his brother had come back empty handed.  _Strange,_ he thought.

“We need to go, Mino,” Seunghyun all but growled. “Right now.”

The chubby-cheeked brunette rose to his feet at once and grabbed his coat. “I guess I’ll catch you guys later,” he said, nodding to Seung-Seung and Taehyun. “Later, Taehyun. It was nice to meet you, Seunghoon. Seungyoon.”

Seunghyun whirled around to leave, only to find Zico standing there with a wide smile still on his lips. The brunette shivered. Mino, noticing his brother’s reaction, grabbed his arm and tugged him past the stranger. Zico silently turned and watched them leave, laughing at the way Seunghyun practically ran out with his tail between his legs. Once they were tucked safely in a taxi, Mino shot his brother a confused look. “Who was that?”

“No one.” Seunghyun gave his head a desperate shake. “No one at all.”

Mino scoffed. “Seunghyun, I’ve never seen you react that way to someone before. Don’t lie to me.”

Seunghyun hesitated before clearing his throat. “Not here. I’ll tell you back at my place.” He licked his bottom lip. “Can… can you stay over tonight? I shouldn’t be alone.”

Curling his hand in Seunghyun’s clammy grip, Mino nodded and assured him, “Of course. I told you I’d be there anytime you needed me.” It was remarkable how quickly Mino began to feel sober; he had never seen his brother like this – not even when Daesung had died. The fear etched onto his fine features was primal, as though he were a deer caught in the sights of a cougar. The ride in the elevator was painfully silent, and Mino could almost feel Seunghyun trying to crawl out of his skin beside him. Even when Seunghyun tried to unlock his apartment door, his hand shook so much that Mino had to take the key to open it for him. Seunghyun had only had a single glass of wine to drink, so he wasn’t drunk. It had to be that guy from the bar, whoever he was, that had Seunghyun acting like this. But why?

Stumbling around the apartment, Seunghyun seemed to be searching desperately for something in the darkness – almost as if he were an asthmatic looking for his inhaler. Mino flipped on the lights. Seunghyun suddenly pounced on a piece of paper that had been sitting on the coffee table and clung to it like a lifeline. “Seunghyun,” Mino murmured, “what’s going on? Are you alright?”

The man shook his head. “No. I’m not alright. I’m not even close to alright.” He collapsed on the sofa and continued to shake. 

Gingerly, Mino sank down to sit beside his brother. “Would it help you to talk about it?” His hand came to rest lightly on his brother’s knee, just to remind him he was not alone.

Seunghyun took a shuddering breath. “You probably don’t want to know,” he muttered. “You’d never think of me the same way again.”

Mino’s heavy brows knit together as a frown curled his lips. “Seunghyun, nothing could change how I feel about you. You’re my brother.”

“Feeling and thinking are not the same thing,” the brunette pointed out sardonically. But, he heaved a sigh. “If you are certain…”

“Only if it would help me help you. I’m just worried about you,” Mino admitted. “I’ve never seen you like this, and it’s terrifying.”

Seunghyun barked out a laugh – the sound falling strangely into the air between them. There was nothing funny about the situation; it was like trying to laugh at a nightmare come to life. “Zico.” His hand curled into a fist on top of his thigh. “His name is Zico.”

From where he sat watching the brothers, Daesung nearly sank to the floor in shock. He had sensed Seunghyun’s distress and come as quickly as he had been able to; but, he had not been fast enough. The cold prick of fear pierced the angel’s heart as Seunghyun began to unravel the story surrounding the man from the bar. Jiyong frowned at the way his baby angel had begun to tremble.

“Dae and I had been dating – really dating – for a couple of months when I got cold feet. It terrified me to think that I was so crazy about one person that I had started to think in terms of ‘us’ and ‘we’ instead of ‘me’ and ‘him.’” Seunghyun brought the paper in his hand to rest over his heart. “I panicked. So, I started making some choices that I regretted even as I made them.” He pinched his eyes shut. “It was so easy to go out drinking and blame everything on being too drunk to realize what I was doing. But then I met Zico.

“He was like fire and ice – burning and cold, a killer with a kind smile. I was fascinated by him because he was everything that Daesung wasn’t. He was brutal, selfish, and didn't even to pretend to care about me.” He could feel more than hear Mino’s breath catching. “We started screwing like there was no tomorrow. And, in a sick way, I grew to care for him. He became an obsession: I’d be with Daesung, but my mind would be on Zico. It was destroying me – tearing my soul apart – because I knew I loved Dae, even if I wasn’t willing to admit it.”

Mino frowned down at the floor. “If you loved Daesung, why did you keep things up with Zico?” The younger Choi, who was loyal to a fault, was struggling to understand how his brother could do such an awful thing. And to Daesung of all people in the world.

“It was an addiction. I couldn't stop seeing him, no matter how much I wanted to.” Seunghyun rubbed a hand over his face. “When Daesung caught us together, I wanted to die. I’d hurt the most perfect man in the world; I deserved to burn in Hell for what I put him through.”

Jiyong reached over to put a hand on Daesung’s shoulder. “Why didn’t you tell me that had happened?” he murmured.

Daesung was trying to stare a hole into the floor in order to fight back the tears that threatened to spill down his cheeks. “Because I never thought Zico would come back into our lives,” he admitted breathlessly. “I never would have imagined…” He shook his head.

“Daesung broke up with me on the spot. Third worst day of my life,” Seunghyun sighed. “But it was what it took to get me away from Zico. I became fixated on making things right, even if I was never able to earn Daesung’s love again.”

Mino leaned back into the couch, trying to absorb the revelation and all of its implications. “If I were him, I never would have forgiven you,” he admitted.

Seunghyun gave a broken laugh. “I honestly don’t know why he did. Or why he took me back – that was the even bigger mystery.” His throat became tight with tears as he remembered the expression on Daesung’s face when they had broken up. Everything from the way Daesung’s bottom lip had quivered to the veins popping out along his neck as he forced back the tears that made his dark eyes bright was burned into the folds of his brain. It had been that mental image that had kept Seunghyun from calling Zico when the loneliness threatened to overwhelm him, and it had been that mental image that had given Seunghyun the strength to change. He had never wanted to see an expression like that on Daesung's face ever again. “But he did. When I asked him why he was giving me another chance, he said…he said it was because he loved me.”

As Seunghyun dissolved into tears, Mino pulled him onto his shoulder and held him close. The elder buried his face in the crook of his brother’s neck and sobbed without any semblance of control. Even just seeing Zico had stirred up so many painful memories; it was like reliving the break up in all its terrible agony. And, in a sick way, it felt as though he had lost Daesung all over again.

“After I took him back,” Daesung murmured, “I told him I loved him every day for months. It was the hardest thing I think I’ve ever done, because at first…all I could see was them tangled together. But that did not make my feelings any less true.” He looked up at Jiyong, swallowing back tears as he did so. “It took him six months to say he loved me back. Six months for him to begin to forgive himself and feel safe in our relationship.”

In a rare moment of tenderness, Jiyong took Daesung’s hand between both of his – squeezing it gently. “He still loves you, Daesung. Seeing Zico isn’t going to change that.”

“Isn’t it?” A sudden, unfamiliar voice purred from the doorway. The pair of angels looked up only to be confronted by the sight of Seungri smirking at them. Sauntering into the room, he stopped – posing for their benefit. He thought it was a particularly gracious public service to allow the poor angels to see what a real man looked like; no, a god among men. Yes, that sounded right. “Because, I am pretty sure that poor Seunghyun has a blond-haired kryptonite that is going to make this game so, so easy to win.”

Daesung surged to his feet and was across the room in an instant; Seungri’s shirt was caught firmly in the angel’s fist. Seungri chuckled even as Jiyong became pale. “Taeyang was right, you are a feisty little thing.” He bit his bottom lip and winked teasingly at the angel. Confused, Daesung reeled back. “I got to say, though, that you are even uglier up close. I have no idea how Seunghyun put up with waking up to that face every morning. It would literally make me nauseous having to look at you.”

The angel’s fingers fell from the demon’s shirt; numb. Rising, Jiyong moved to pull Daesung behind him. “Seungri, what are you doing here?”

“Oh, you remember me!” Seungri laughed happily. “I’m flattered, Jiyong. It’s nice to know my handiwork is so unforgettable.”

Jiyong squared his shoulders; Daesung needed him to be strong. “That doesn’t answer my question. Why are you here?”

“Ah, you see, I noticed that Taeyang needed a little bit of help. So I thought I would shake things up a little. Make it more exciting, I guess you could say.” He paused, looking closely at Daesung. “You know, you might be ugly, but I like the hair color. I think it would be way better on me, though.” A flick of his wrist turned his hair a pale, golden blond that was nearly white. “See. Way better on me.”

“Seungri, you keep your nose out of this,” Jiyong hissed. “Your trainee is supposed to be the one doing the soul stealing, not you.”

“Mm, funny thing about rules? We demons are super bad at following them.” Seungi licked his bottom lip and laughed at the looks on their faces. “If you want any chance of beating me, baby angel, you’re going to need to step up your game. Or, better yet, you could just give up. Be like every other angel Jiyong’s trained and fail miserably. It’s practically tradition now.”

It happened in a flash: One moment Daesung was trembling from a poisonous cocktail of feelings, and then he was suddenly springing into action. His fist connected with the demon’s jaw, sending him flying to the floor – clutching his jaw. “I order you to leave,” Daesung snapped. “Get out before I do worse to you.”

Picking himself up, Seungri carefully dusted off his black pants. He then shot the younger angel a glare that was curled around the sneer on his lips. “I’ll go, but this is only the start,” he spat out. “Just for that, I’m going to tear Seunghyun’s soul apart brick by brick. There won’t be enough of him to mourn when I’m through.” The room darkened – the lights flickering in and out – and the demon was gone.


	11. Can't We Love Again?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If only it were so easily solved.

Seunghyun was utterly baffled when Ji-Hyo called and asked if she could come visit him. They had not spoken since the day of Daesung’s funeral – not really, anyway. In the weeks after Daesung's death, she had stopped past the apartment, called through the door, and gotten sworn at. That was not the same as speaking to one another. So, the sound of her voice over the phone had truly surprised Seunghyun; he would have thought he would be the last person she called for help. The man had hesitated only a moment before acquiescing to her request. Sitting across from her was strangely awkward; it unnerved Seunghyun. She had become like a sister to him over the years, but he had never seen her like this before. Her normally shiny brown hair hung limply about her too pale face, and her amber eyes were bloodshot from too many tear-filled nights. He cleared his throat. “What happened?”

Ji-Hyo dew in a shuddering breath. “Junsu cheated on me.” Her voice was strangely flat with the admission – as though someone had taken away her ability to feel. It reminded him of how she had sounded at the morgue. His mind tickled with a memory: Daesung telling him that Ji-Hyo would shut down emotionally when distressed.  _This must have been what he meant,_ Seunghyun thought with a frown.

“Did you catch them together?” He personally could not imagine Junsu – who seemed to worship the ground Ji-Hyo walked on – ever cheating on her. But, then again, he knew from personal experience that cheaters came in all shapes and sizes. His heart stung a little at the thought.

She gave a particularly emphatic sniffle, even though her expression did not so much as flinch. “No.”

Seunghyun blinked. “Then…how do you know he was cheating on you?” This situation seemed to be getting stranger and stranger by the moment.

The woman began to wring her slim hands – twisting them nervously in her lap. “I found messages on his phone. From a number I didn’t recognize.” Seunghyun felt his breath catch; that was not a good sign. “They said things like ‘how are you’ and ‘thank you for yesterday.’”

He tilted his head. “There was nothing, I dunno, about meeting up or anything –“ he flushed, “suggestive?”

She blinked at him owlishly, her eyes wide. “N-no. But there didn’t have to be.”

He sat back in his chair and crossed his legs. “Has Junsu been staying late at work or going on business trips or come home with any weird bruises or-“ Seunghyun ran a hand over his eyes; he could not believe he was about to ask this, “has he been more sexually demanding?”

That really made Ji-Hyo gape at him. Her mouth flopped open and closed like she was a fish that had just been dropped on the deck of a ship, and her eyes managed to get even wider. “N-no!” It appeared to be quite the struggle for Ji-Hyo to get that one little word out, but it made Seunghyun feel better.

“Honestly, Ji-Hyo, it doesn’t sound like he’s cheating on you,” he admitted. “If he were, he would be acting different in some way. Staying late at work or being more aggressive in the bedroom. Anything. It could be that you’ve mistaken the situation.” Seunghyun tried to speak gently, but it was very difficult to be both blunt and kind – for him at least. Her hands began to tremble in her lap, so Seunghyun reached over to take them in his. “I think maybe you should talk to Junsu and hear his side of the story. Communication is important in any relationship, and listening is just as important as talking.”

A frown furrowed her brow as she looked at him. There was a long stretch of silence – her sleep deprived brain was not particularly sharp – before she murmured, “How did you get so smart about relationships?”

He chuckled softly. “Daesung taught me.” Their eyes met, and the man shared a sad smile with the woman he practically considered his sister-in-law.

“…He was the best at listening.”

“I know.”

“Maybe…”

“Hm?”

“I guess I can listen to what he has to say,” she hazarded, frowning to herself. She was still not certain she believed Seunghyun, but the woman just knew that Daesung would want her to at least try to listen to her fiancé. He had always said that love deserved a second chance - it was too rare and special to give up on right away. Ji-Hyo thought she could practically hear Daesung saying that love took a lot of work, a sprinkling of kindness, and the ability to put someone else's needs first. He had always managed to balance being a romantic and a realist; Ji-Hyo never understood how he did it.

“I think that’d be a good choice, Ji. If nothing else, it would mean you were completely certain about your actions.” Seunghyun gave her hands another squeeze. “But you should meet on neutral ground – not his place or yours. Daesung taught me that too.”

She nodded – dazed. “Yeah. I – that makes sense.” Her gaze yet again fell to rest on their hands, and she teased at her bottom lip with her teeth. “Could you call him for me? I…I don’t want to screw it up before I hear him out.”

Seunghyun’s lips twitched. In moments like this one, he could really see how Daesung and Ji-Hyo were related. He could remember Daesung asking him to place calls for him, because he hated the lack of body language and expression phones created. And he gave Ji-Hyo the same reply he used to give Daesung: “Let’s call together.”

It did not surprise Seunghyun in the least that Junsu had immediately agreed to meet with Ji-Hyo – he had actually sounded quite desperate when he heard her voice again. Soon the brunette was walking the woman to the designated restaurant: a little place he had recommended. It seemed best to send the lovers to a place that held no memories for them, just to keep the balance as fair as possible.  _Dae would be so proud that I remembered all of his rules from our fights. He really did train me well,_ he thought with a tiny smile. Stopping in front of the pizzeria, he turned to look down at Ji-Hyo. “Remember to listen,” he advised her one last time. “And…be willing to forgive.” Seunghyun gave Ji-Hyo a last hug before sending her into the restaurant; it was now between the lovers to sort things out for good or ill.

When Ji-Hyo approached the table, Junsu surged to his feet and let his gaze take in all of the changes a week had wrought on her. The faint hollowing of her cheek and the bags around her eyes told him that the woman was not getting enough to eat or sleep. His gaze then flickered down to rest on her twitching fingers; she was nervous. Even the way her feet dragged a little as she walked made it seem like she was approaching her execution rather than a meeting with her fiancé. Junsu silently pulled out a chair for her, helping slide in it as she sat. He then settled in the chair opposite of hers and waited with bated breath, hoping she was not going to break up with him in the first ten seconds of their meeting.

“Junsu?”

His gaze slowly rose to meet hers. “Yes, Ji-Hyo?” The taste of her name was as sweet as ever, but he rued the bitter aftertaste of fear it left in his mouth.

“Who were those text messages from?”

Junsu stared uncomprehendingly at her, his head tipping slightly to one side. “What text messages?”

“The ones about thanking you and hoping you have a great day and you’re so wonderful,” she said in a rush, the words nearly tripping over each other in their hurry to fall from her mouth.

He stared at her – not quite comprehending her words. And then, suddenly, understanding made his eyes bright. Reaching into his jacket pocket, he pulled out his phone and brought up the series of messages he figured she was talking about. Silently, he slid it across the table for her to read. Her eyes poured over the familiar messages – the ones that made her lips draw into a tight line – before she hit the more recent texts. Her heart stopped at the last one: “The song turned out great. We’ll record it tomorrow. Thanks for the last minute rewrite.” A sudden, shamed blush heated her skin even as her head sunk down in embarrassment. The phone was gingerly sat down on the table and slid back towards Junsu. “…Oh.”

Junsu hesitated before running his finger around the edge of his phone. “Are those messages why you thought I was –“

“Yes.” She cleared her throat. “I – oh…” Ji-Hyo swayed about in her seat, absolutely miserable. “I’m so sorry, Junsu. I don’t even know what put that thought into my head.” Tears began to gather in her eyes; she felt like a complete moron. Junsu had been so constant and loyal over the years, but she had doubted him over literally the smallest thing ever. It was as though she no longer recognized herself. 

Carefully, Junsu reached across the table and took her small, delicate hand in his. “I wouldn’t cheat on you, love,” he murmured. “If – and this is a pretty big if – I thought our relationship wasn’t working, I would talk to you first. Even if I was developing feelings for someone else, I would want to be honest with you about that, because you deserve it. And I hope you can trust me on that.”

His fingers were quickly caught in a vice-like grip as Ji-Hyo tugged him across the table for a deep kiss. “I love you, Junsu,” she said, sounding utterly miserable. “Can you forgive me for doubting you?”

Junsu quickly moved around the table and crouched beside her chair, wrapping his arms around her. “Of course I can. After everything that's been going on this year, I think the stress just...made things difficult for us. Especially for you.” He pressed a kiss to her cheek. “Can you forgive me for giving you any room to doubt me?” She eagerly nodded. A small, almost shy smile drew itself on his lips. “Does this mean that the wedding’s back on?” Another nod met his question even as Ji-Hyo began to choke on the strange combination of tears and laughter that meant she was incandescently happy. Junsu just beamed at the love of his life, grateful that he had been given the chance to win her back.

From where he stood watching through the window, Seunghyun smiled to himself as the couple shared a soft kiss. It seemed love could triumph, at least in the small things. He turned to walk down the street, a distinctly lighter bounce in his step as he headed towards the subway. But Seunghyun’s happiness was not to last.

Seungri was very displeased to see that yet another of Taeyang’s supposedly brilliant ideas had unraveled so quickly. Either the younger demon was utterly incompetent (super likely) or sabotaging the operation (laughable). “Time to take matters into my own hands,” he sighed, shaking his head. “I guess there’s a reason I’m the fabulous demon lord and Taeyang’s not even managed to get out of training.” Not that he cared about Taeyang or the punishment he was likely to face if he failed. If anything, Seungri would enjoy watching the cocky little upstart suffer. Turning, he disappeared into the shadows.

It was time to get to work.

Ever since helping Ji-Hyo, Seunghyun found his mind frequently occupied with thoughts of blond hair and eye smiles. But, for once, it was not Daesung's blond hair and eye smiles he found his mind lingering on. No, his mind was filled with a wilder, more rambunctious blond who played life loose and fast. Zico. In a way, it bemused Seunghyun to find his thoughts so thoroughly enraptured; but, it seemed that even a brief meeting had been enough to leave an impact. It felt almost like he was an alcoholic who had been clean for six years only to have taken a sip of vodka by accident. His throat practically burned with needs he had thought were buried and forgotten. And maybe, the man reasoned, alcohol was a good solution.

Rising, Seunghyun snagged his phone, keys, and wallet. A drink at the bar was not pursuing Zico, he thought. It was going out – being social – at a location where he had happened to run into the blond just once. The likelihood of running into Zico again was so low, it was not a concern – definitely not. Why, he did not even check around the bar for that familiar head of platinum hair as he pushed through the crowd of bodies. He was perfectly well behaved as he placed an order for a beer, and there was nothing unnatural about the way he turned to watch the dancers pressing together.

And then his heart began to race as his fingers curled tightly around the neck of the beer bottle.

There, dancing as though the world itself was ending, was Zico. His arms flailed loosely about as he tipped his head back in utter abandonment, a look of pure ecstasy on his broad features. The lights of the club caught on his pale skin and hair, making him seem far more ethereal than Seunghyun had ever seen him. Every move was punctuated with Zico’s usual boundless energy; it reminded the brunette so much of the countless parties they had attended together. Zico had a way of lighting up a room and setting the mood on fire. Some of their friends had joked that a party did not begin until the blond all but kicked down the door and stepped onto the dancefloor. Apparently Zico was as he always had been while Seunghyun felt as though he had lived a hundred lifetimes.

Finishing his beer, Seunghyun was about to rise – he was satisfied at having at least seen the object of his obsession – when their gazes happened to catch. He gulped. Zico’s face managed to split into an even wider smile, one that seemed to halve his face, before he was suddenly swimming through the crowd towards the brunette. Seunghyun froze even as his grip on the empty bottle tightened, making his knuckles go ghostly white. 

Standing face to face with the blond was like stepping back into the past. It was like he was back in undergraduate – working on his business degree and scant months into his relationship with an angelic guy – except that this time things were different. Seunghyun was older and carried the weight of incredible loss in his heart, but this time there were no strings on him, either. He had an alien realization that there was no Daesung waiting for him to message him when he got home, no Daesung worrying about him drinking too much, no Daesung to cheat on … No Daesung. Seunghyun’s heart lurched in his chest.

“Hey, handsome,” Zico said with a laugh. “How’s it going?” His gaze fell to the bottle in Seunghyun’s hand. “You need a refill?”

Seunghyun instinctively leaned away from Zico – coming to rest on the bar. “I’m fine, thanks.”

Zico tipped his head slightly to the side, his eyes sparkling impishly. “Well, I already knew that,” he teased. “But, seriously, let me buy you a drink. Or else I’ll make you dance with me.”

The brunette was not certain which fate sounded worse, honestly. Another drink could wear down what defenses he had while dancing was just as dangerous with someone like Zico. It was like being asked to pick the lesser of two evils only to realize that both options were a bad idea. He cleared his throat – sweat beginning to gather at his temple. “I should go,” he mumbled. Yes, that was a good choice, he thought. Leaving meant getting away – being able to breathe.

A pout turned Zico’s lips. “Hyunnie, how can I catch up with you if you run away? I just want to know what you’ve been up to.”

Seunghyun looked away. “…Just one drink.” He could last for a single drink. It was not like he was unable to control himself, when the need arose.

Zico grinned as though Seunghyun had offered to buy him an entire store worth of Hello Kitty paraphernalia. “Another beer or do you trust me to order for you?”

The brunette sighed. “Whatever.”

Far too soon for comfort, Seunghyun found himself being guided over to a table with a mojito in his hand. Zico’s choice was surprisingly adult – six years ago it would have been jaeger bombs or tequila – and it made the brunette relax a little. Perhaps he really did just want to talk. Sitting down at the selected table, he took a small sip of the drink and avoided really looking at the man across from him. “So.”

“So,” Zico repeated, clearly teasing him.

“Six years.” Seunghyun nodded a little and began to fiddle with the lime on the rim of his glass.

“Yep. Six years.” Zico laughed. “What has the great Choi Seunghyun been doing all these years? Causing a lot of trouble?”

Seunghyun barked a laugh. “No. Not really. I own an antiques store.” He could feel Zico’s disbelieving stare burning into his forehead. “Gave me the chance to channel my love of antiques into something productive. I do pretty well.”

“Well, I mean, that’s cool. You did always have a weird thing for furniture.” The blond laughed. “I mean, I remember the time you proposed to that chair when you were completely wasted. You even tried to take it home with you.”

Seunghyun laughed – just a little. “Yeah. I did.”

“Is that all you’ve been doing? Just…owning a store?”

The brunette knew what Zico meant; he was asking if Seunghyun had been doing any _one_. A frown creased Seunghyun’s brow, and he took a particularly deep draught of the mojito – silently cursing its lower alcohol content. “Do you remember Daesung?” He glanced up at Zico, catching the look of surprise that flashed across the man’s face.

“How could I forget him?” Zico laughed a little, though the sound was a bit strange - hollow. “He ranks in the top five scariest people I’ve ever met. And the kid didn’t even have to yell.”

Seunghyun pulled the lime from his glass and began to twist it between his fingers. “He and I were together until this past April.”

Zico’s mouth hung open. “What happened?” Last he had known, Daesung had made it very clear that he and Seunghyun were over. The fact they had gotten back together was surprising enough, but that they had lasted so long… Seunghyun must have really screwed up to lose him twice.

The man took a slow breath. “He died.”

Reaching across the table, Zico gave Seunghyun’s hand a squeeze. “I’m so sorry. That must’ve been awful.”

“Awful?” Seunghyun gave a tired laugh. “Yeah, that’s one word for it.” He tipped back the rest of his drink. “Skies, I think I could use something stronger.”

“Let me go get you something better,” Zico murmured, pushing his drink across the table to Seunghyun before rising to his feet. He returned from the bar with sake – lots of sake.

Watching the pair drink, Daesung frowned as Seunghyun began to get more and more wobbly; he had nearly fallen out of his chair twice now. Zico seemed to be behaving himself, though, which surprised the angel. He remembered the sorts of things Zico had liked to add to drinks when he thought no one was looking – little mood enhancers, he called them. But this time Zico was just letting Seunghyun drink and talk his problems away, like a normal human. Maybe the man had changed for the better over the years.

And then he caught sight of Seungri and Youngbae standing in the shadows near the duo’s table.

Daesung’s breath caught as he noticed the way the demons were smirking. A chill of dread ran down his spine. From his side, Jiyong murmured, “Maybe we should get Seunghyun home. He’s getting completely wasted.”

The blond nodded and moved forward to place a hand on Seunghyun’s shoulder. “You should get a cab and go home.” But, Seunghyun continued tipping back his sake as though he had not heard a word Daesung had said. The blond frowned. “Seunghyun. You need to go home. Stop drinking.”

Nothing.

Daesung’s gaze snapped up to rest on the demons, who had broken out into rather raucous laughter – well, Seungri had. “He can’t hear you,” Seungri called with a grin. “Funny thing when you’re drunk: You can’t hear angels anymore. It’s why people get into so much trouble once they get drinking.”

Unwilling to give up, Daesung decided to try a different tactic. Zico had been drinking less, and so it was worth a shot to talk to him, he thought. Going to the man’s side, Daesung lightly placed a hand on his shoulder. “Zico, you should send Seunghyun home. He’s way too drunk and needs to sleep it off.”

He thought he could feel Zico still beneath his hand – a sign that he had heard him – but the man just poured Seunghyun another helping of sake. Daesung stumbled back at the sight of the smirk that twisted Zico’s lips as Seunghyun tossed the shot back. He then watched in horror as Zico reached across the table and caught Seunghyun’s hand in his. Rubbing his thumb along the inside of Seunghyun’s wrist, the blond leaned across the table and licked his bottom lip. “You need a ride home, handsome?”

Daesung’s heart lurched.

Seunghyun’s skin began to heat at the gentle contact of Zico’s thumb. His eyes lidded as he leaned onto the table. “That’d be good,” he slurred. “So good.”

Using his grip on Seunghyun’s hand, Zico pulled him up and started for the door. “Then let’s go, gorgeous.” He hailed a cab and tugged the man in with him. Seunghyun managed to give the driver his address; he lived in a much nicer neighborhood than Zico had expected. As they rode towards their destination, Zico traced his fingertips along the strong shape of Seunghyun’s thigh. He could remember the last time they had been together like this. The brunette had come storming into the café where Zico worked – he clothing had been plastered to his body by the outpouring of rain – and insisted the blond come with him. Seunghyun had pulled him into his car and raced back to his apartment; the tension between them enough to set the blood crackling beneath Zico’s porcelain skin. And when Seunghyun had gotten him home – oh! That man could kiss like the devil himself. It had been heat and impetuous demand and burning dominance. Zico knew he brought out something special in Seunghyun: the wildness in him. But then Daesung had come in. A frown touched Zico’s lips at the memory. After that, Seunghyun vanished from his life without a trace, and oh how Zico hated Daesung for it.

Seunghyun would regret leaving him for that pitiful little weakling.

They stumbled into the elevator together, and Zico pulled Seunghyun in close with an arm about the man’s waist. Seunghyun leaned eagerly into the warmth of Zico’s body, and his head fell to rest on the curve of the blond’s shoulder. He kept having the feeling he should peel himself away from Zico – that he should run – but it felt so good. Why would he try to escape something that made his blood race pleasantly through his veins? What a ridiculous thought. He did not even have the will to protest when Zico left his arm around his waist as they walked down the hall to the dark mahogany door of his apartment. Surely, Zico was just making certain he did not fall on his face as they walked. He was thoughtful like that. The blond was even kind enough to help Seunghyun unlock the door and step inside.

The brunette flashed him a crooked smile in the semi-darkness of the apartment. “Thanks for making sure I made it home.”

Zico used his grip on Seunghyun to pull the man closer – their chests brushing lightly. “My pleasure, Seunghyun.” He tipped his head a little. “Be shame if you’d gotten lost on the way.”

Seunghyun chuckled, the sound strangely low and rough. “Yeah… Shame.” His long fingers lifted to curl around Zico’s jaw. The blond parted his lips slightly, his tongue peeking out to sweep across his bottom lip. Seunghyun’s blazing dark eyes were caught on the motion. Zico sunk his teeth lightly into his own bottom lip even as he pressed their bodies closer together. His gaze caught briefly with Seunghyun’s, and it was as though something had snapped in the older man.

Their mouths met in a clash of teeth and tongue as Zico’s hands began to wander over the strong shape of Seunghyun’s chest. They stumbled over each other through the darkness as wandering fingers found buttons and hems, tugging ruthlessly until fabric began to gave way to skin. As they spilled into the bedroom, Seunghyun caught sight of the bed from the corner of his eye as Zico set about pressing hot, open-mouthed kisses along his neck. The man went cold at the sight of sky blue sheets peeping out from beneath the coverlet. His throat went dry, and he planted his hands firmly on Zico’s chest. “Stop it.”

Zico scoffed a little. “Come on, Seunghyun.” He caught his mouth for a deep kiss that almost got Seunghyun to melt. But only almost.

Cursing, the brunette firmly shoved Zico away, making the man nearly stumble back into the wall. “Get out,” he gasped.

“Seunghyun, what are you –“

Whirling, Seunghyun grabbed the glass he kept on the nightstand and threw it against the wall. “I said get out,” he barked. Zico’s lips drew into a tight line before he grabbed his shirt off the floor and stalked out. He was far from finished with Seunghyun; this was just a temporary setback.

The moment the front door clicked shut, Seunghyun collapsed on the bed and began to sob. He grabbed Daesung’s pillow from the empty side of the bed and curled tightly around it – some part of his alcohol-soaked brain reasoning it was his lover he was holding onto. “I’m so sorry, Dae,” he choked. “So sorry. I love you. Please don’t leave me.”

Crawling onto the bed with him, Daesung wrapped his arms tightly around the brunette and pressed soft kisses to his heated skin. “I love you, Seunghyun. I promise, I’m here. Always.” He held the brunette until his tears had dissolved into snores and the frown had melted into an uneasy sleep. But, the angel’s heart was ill at ease. He was…afraid. The demons were more dangerous than he had realized, and he could not let Seunghyun pay the price for his mistake. 

But the fight had only just begun.


	12. It All Seems Like A Fantasy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If only he could just let it all go...

A cold November evening rain spilled on the streets of Seoul – biting through clothing and piercing the vulnerable flesh beneath. It was the sort of day where it was best to stay inside, curled up with that special someone, and spend the day lazing about. And while many of the citizens of Seoul were engaged in such languorous activities, a lone figure trotted down the nearly barren sidewalk with his hood pulled down over his face in a meager attempt to protect it from the rain. He winced as his sneaker connected with a puddle; he could feel the wet seeping through his sock. It was just his luck. With a roll of his eyes, the man slipped into the warmth of the bakery: the heat and delectable scents reaching out to wrap around his frozen body. Reaching up, he pulled his hood down and pushed his scarf off his nose.

But the usual sassy greeting did not come.

Instead, Mino was treated to the forlorn sounds of “Yesterday” by The Beatles playing on a seemingly endless repeat. A deep frown etched itself onto the man’s normally smiling lips, and he peered around the shop in hopes of spotting the illusive diva baker.

Taehyun was seated by the window – at Seunghyun’ table – with a green tea latte hanging loosely between his long fingers. His hair hung messily about his face, as though he had run his hands through it countless time, and a frown turned his delicately bowed lips downwards. Judging by the half-eaten macaroons on the plate in front of him, Taehyun was distracted and unsettled; Mino knew of very little that could stop him from eating. “Taehyun.” No response. “NamTae.” Not even a twitch. “Hey gorgeous.”

That got Taehyun to turn towards him, blinking like a cat newly woken from a nap. His droopy brows lifted as he took in the dripping brunette and the small puddle he had created on the linoleum. “Did you just call me gorgeous?”

Mino laughed easily and slid his coat off. “Yeah. You weren’t responding to anything else, so I thought it might work.”

A tiny flash of a smile darted across the baker’s lip before disappearing like a sliver of lightning. “Well, you know how much I adore being worshipped,” he drawled.

The brunette hung his coat on one of the hooks that rested near the door before moving to sit at Taehyun’s table. “So, what has you so distracted?” Reaching over, he picked up the pistachio macaroon and began to nibble on it.

The baker’s thin chest rose and feel in a heavy, dramatic sigh. “I get ridiculously pouty when I get dumped,” he murmured.

Mino’s thick brows attempted to crawl up into his hairline, he lifted them so high. “What? You got dumped?” He really tried to sound like he was concerned, but his voice could not help but warm a little with excitement. A single Taehyun was a Taehyun he could flirt with and even ask out.

Taehyun sighed. “Seunghoon did not think it was working out. So he ended it.” The lithe brunette tipped his head in a quickly dismissive gesture. “I wasn’t even particularly invested in dating him, we were very casual, but it still hurts to have been dumped. It’s like my ego can’t handle the thought of someone not wanting to spend all of their time with me. I get ridiculously moody and end up buying far too many books. And shoes.”

Reaching over, Mino gave Taehyun’s hand a squeeze. “I understand. But, hey, at least you have the opportunity to date new people – people who’d be willing to go shopping with you. And eat your delicious macaroons.”

Taehyun turned his dark gaze on Mino, and the artist suddenly realized he understood how a mouse must feel when cornered by a cat. The delicate, almond eyes curved slightly upwards at the ends as something of a smile turned Taehyun’s lips; he was giving Mino the most thoughtful examination the brunette had ever undergone. It was like he was being weighed and measured – for what he did not know. And then, just as suddenly as it had begun, the moment was gone. Taehyun gave his fingers a little squeeze before dropping his gaze down to the table. “Thanks, Mino. You really are wonderful.”

Mino rubbed at the back of his head even as a shy smile tugged his lips. “I don’t know about that,” he protested gently. But he could not help the blush that managed to heat his tanned skin at the thought of Taehyun liking something about him. “But, you really should believe in yourself, Taehyun. I am sure there are lots of people who want to be with you.”

The baker hesitated for a moment before leaning his elbows onto the table. “Even someone like you?”

The brunette’s eyes went wide as he gaped at Taehyun. “Well, yes,” he admitted in a rush. “But I also want to give you time to get over Seunghoon before asking you out. I’d hate to move too fast.”

A crooked little smile turned Taehyun’s lips. “For someone who looks so intimidating, you really are just a teddy bear, aren’t you?” His long, slim fingers ran lightly through his hair, disturbing his middle part. “Would you at least be willing to share a dance with me? As I recall, I wasn’t able to give you one because I was attached at the time.”

Mino’s mouth hung slightly open. “Right now?”

“Yes,” Taehyun nodded. “Right now. I don’t think anyone will be coming in this evening. Not with this weather. And it’s nearly closing time anyway.”

Mino thought about that for a long, hard moment. “How about I help you close things up…and then we can have that dance?”

“Deal!” Taehyun grinned at him and rose to his feet. “As a reward for your help, I might have to send you home with some snacks. I sold out of most everything that I needed to, but I have the feeling you’d be willing to help me with what I didn’t.”

Wrinkling his nose, Mino laughed and trailed after Taehyun. “You know me too well. Depending on what it is, I might even drop some off to Seunghyun. We Chois are naturally sweet-tooths.”

The baker smirked at him over his shoulder. “Good thing you’re not the baker, then. You’d gorge yourself on your own creations.”

An acute sadness flickered across Mino’s features. “I’ve been down that kind of road before. It’s not one even being a baker-“  _or a baker’s boyfriend,_ “could get me down again. I have self-control when I need it.”

A frown settled on Taehyun’s lips. “What do you mean?” What he had meant as a joke had apparently missed its mark by miles, judging by the way Mino had begun to fidget.

“Seunghyun and I were both really chubby growing up. It wasn’t until our parents died and food became harder to come by that either of us slimmed down,” he admitted. “And…I don’t want to be that guy again. I don't want to be the fat kid, Hugeboy Mino.”

“Skies, I’m sorry.” Taehyun ducked his head in shame. “I just meant to be funny. I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.”

Walking over to the baker, Mino clapped a hand on his shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “I know you didn’t, NamTae. There’s no way you could’ve known.” He gave him a little shake. “Come on. Let’s clean up so I can get that dance you owe me.”

Seunghyun felt like he was spiraling out of control. He felt as though he were running backwards – rushing towards the very that made him miserable. And, worst of all, he invited the poison back into his life. It was as though he had signed over all of his self-control to the smirking blond whose face haunted him at every turn. Seunghyun could barely think without some hint of Zico taking over his thoughts and overwhelming him with the need to see the man again. Each day, each hour, made it harder to resist the pull to find his way back to the bar – back to Zico. Hanging his head, Seunghyun choked on the stale sensation of air entering his lungs. He could barely breathe the need to be near Zico was so strong. Even the comfort of Daesung’s cologne sprayed on the pillowcase was only enough to dispel thoughts of the other man for a few minutes. It scared Seunghyun just how quickly Zico overwhelmed him. Owned him. Controlled him. He barely felt like himself anymore.

A frown curled Youngbae’s lips as he watched Seunghyun begin to drown in the tempest of his emotions. The man had managed to drop a good bit of weight in the scant weeks since Zico had been chased out of his apartment; he looked like a man hunted, even as he drug himself through the business of each day. Youngbae could see so much of himself in the way Seunghyun trembled at the thought of temptation, except that they were haunted by different vices. While the demon had been driven by wrath, Seunghyun was the victim of an obsessive lust. In a way, it was astounding just how good Seungri was at finding a person’s weakness and turning it against them. He wondered if his own transformation from Youngbae to Taeyang had been so unsettling for those watching from the outside. Some corner of his heart reminded him of Daesung’s words: that Youngbae had been the one to give up on himself. If that were the case – not that it were – then the brunette seemed to be going through something similar. It was as though, slowly, he were giving up the will to fight the relentless tug of Seungri’s influence. Youngbae was fascinated. 

Was this what it took to be a demon lord? A ruthless disregard for the worth of a human soul and a willingness to destroy anyone in order to save yourself a little pain. The cynical voice in the back of Youngbae’s thoughts noted that Jiyong would have made a truly spectacular demon; he was an ace when it came to tearing people apart for his own gain. But Youngbae could feel the first fingers of doubt working their way into the crystalline core of his heart. Was destroying Seunghyun honestly worth it? Those thoughts were quickly pushed aside at the remembered sensation of barbed wire and blazing fire against his skin, but it was becoming harder to ignore that distinct tug inside of his ribcage. His conscience. 

Hands trembling, Taeyang placed them on Seunghyun’s shoulder. “Go to the bar,” he murmured. “Go find Zico. You won’t be able to rest until you’ve seen him.”

Seunghyun groaned beneath his fingertips and buried his face in his hands. There it was again: thoughts of Zico. He wanted to sluff off the chains of his addiction, even if it meant death, but the pull was too strong for the man to resist. His legs quaked beneath the fullness of his weight as he fell out of his chair, and he barely remembered to grab his affects before stumbling into the night. Seunghyun hated himself.

As Taehyun and Mino continued their work, the lights in the bakery began to flicker. Taehyun frowned. “What on –“ The power went out, plunging them into shadowed darkness. Pulling out his phone, Taehyun went to check the breaker and frowned to find nothing amiss. “The grid must be down,” he called. “There is a lighter in my coat pocket. Could you light some of the candles in the shop?” When he stayed late to work on creations, he loved having the warmth of candlelight because he claimed it inspired his creativity. Artificial light was just not the same. Thanks to Taehyun’s love of candlelight, he at least had hordes of them scattered throughout the bakery – handy at a time like that.

“Got it,” Mino replied. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out his phone and lighter before beginning to go about the bakery, lighting each candle he found. By the time Taehyun walked out, the room was awash in a gentle golden glow; it felt a bit like a movie set. Somehow the blush worked its way back onto Mino's cheeks.

Taehyun paused at the sight of Mino in the candlelight; it made his beautiful bronze skin seem to shimmer in the flickering glow. It was breathtaking. He could not help but admire how singular Mino was: Where Seunghyun had an intense beauty, Mino was a brooding – almost melancholy – handsome. The pair were similar and yet so different in the feelings they inspired, yet Taehyun could not help but be entranced by the younger brother’s charms. Seunghyun was eye candy; Mino was bewitching. “You do good work,” he managed to quip. “I guess I’ll keep you around.”

After the intense way Taehyun had stared him down, Mino could not help but feel self-conscious in his soggy sneakers, mud-hemmed jeans, and slouchy shirt. He wondered how someone as fashionable as Taehyun put up with someone who was the opposite of everything Gucchi and Chanel. Some corner of his mind imagined it was like Paris and Los Angeles attempting to see eye-to-eye, which was a given failure. And yet, Taehyun’s eyes did not reflect disdain. If anything, there was a gentleness in them that Mino was discomfited by. “Thanks,” the brunette breathed at least. “Though…I realized we’ve got a problem.”

One of those endearingly droopy brows arched. “Oh?”

Mino pointed up towards the speakers. “No power means no music.”

Taehyun laughed. “I’ve got that covered.” Going to his phone, he pulled up his music collection and began to scroll through it. While he did that, Mino pulled down the blinds and moved the tables so there was a clear space in the middle of the shop. Suddenly nervous, Mino rubbed the sweaty palms of his hands against his jeans in the hopes they would not be too clammy. Taehyun made a pleased sound in the back of his throat and turned up the volume on his phone. “Found it.” He pushed play and sat the phone on the table closest to their impromptu dance floor.

The easy melody of an [unfamiliar song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dqwSde_eEv4) swept through the phone’s speakers before giving way to a rich, honeyed female voice. As the English words poured past Mino’s ears, he took a deep breath and stepped closer to Taehyun. “Can I have this dance?” he asked, flashing the other man a particularly cheesy smile.

“I’d give it to no one else,” Taehyun pretended to huff. And then, his hand slid into the warmth of Mino’s grip. They both let out a slow breath. Mino pulled Taehyun into his arms and began to move to the languid beat of the jazz song. His skin crackled with an awareness of the beauty whose head had come to rest on his shoulder, and a dopey smile snuck onto the man’s lips as he adjusted his arm around Taehyun’s waist. He let his cheek rest lightly on the silken strands of the baker’s hair, allowing Mino an up-close encounter with the distinct combination of sandalwood, green tea, and musk that were all a part of Taehyun’s favorite cologne. The movements of their bodies across the linoleum were simple – just swaying steps – but Mino felt like he was dancing right up to heaven’s doors; holding Taehyun was even better than he had ever imagined. Taehyun, meanwhile, was completely lost in the crisp, heady scent of Mino. After spending his day surrounded by the miasma of sweet smells inherent to a bakery, Taehyun found himself becoming easily lost in the strong, masculine scent of the man whose arms felt so right around him. Seunghoon had been nice to snuggle with, sure, but there was something about Mino that seemed more grounded and solid – as though he were a man you could count on. He smiled a little at the thought. Mino was everything he wished for, right down to the way he’d bounce around like a child at the sight of a new treat. In a word, the artist made life fun. He breathed life into everything around him - coloring the world in beautiful highlights of laughter. Now it was just a matter of convincing Mino that he was not a rebound and that they should go on countless dates, just like Taehyun had imagined the first time their eyes had met all those weeks ago.

The moment Seunghyun set foot in the bar, he could practical sense where Zico was. Yet again, the man was at the epicenter of the dance floor – writhing wildly to the music. Seunghyun’s eyes darkened in hue as he knifed his way through the press of bodies until he stood behind the slightly taller man. He took a breath, overwhelmed by the buzzing heat in his veins. One of his arms slid around Zico’s waist, drawing him flush against his chest, as he moved to match the pace the man set. Tilting his head, the blond looked over his shoulder, and his entire face seemed to light up at the sight of Seunghyun. Without a word, Seunghyun turned Zico around in his arms and crashed their lips together in a nearly brutal meeting of teeth and tongue.  _I deserve to go to Hell,_ Seunghyun thought.


	13. The Last Image of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He had never seen anything so beautiful in his entire life.

November melted away in a haze of self-loathing for Seunghyun. He could barely remember the days as they passed: too much alcohol and Zico burned away his ability to feel at home in the moment. It was as though he were a ship cut from the docks and left to drift in unfamiliar waters – darkness closing in about him. The few flashes of coherency came in the moments he spent with Ji-Hyo, Junsu, and Mino. It almost seemed as though they were the fair winds trying to blow him back to safety; he felt nearly normal in their company. He had even taken to helping Ji-Hyo plan the wedding, since Daesung was unable to finish the task he had begun a year prior when his sister had become engaged. Seunghyun actually felt as though he were a part of the Kang family, though he by no means deserved that sensation. Not with what he did with Zico.

In so many ways, Seunghyun hated himself. He wanted to be the perfect memorial to Daesung’s love and the supportive, giving elder brother to Mino. If he were honest with himself, he even wanted to be close friends with Junsu, who he enjoyed talking to about music and soccer. But the shadows were drawing in too close around his heart. He knew that he was caught in a spiral that merited nothing but contempt and scorn from those he wanted to love. If they knew what he had gotten caught in, he was certain they would abandon him forever. It was what he deserved: to lose them all.

One evening – one of the rare nights spent at home – Seunghyun’s phone began to buzz with an incoming call. He answered, “Hello, Ji-Hyo. Has there been another table linen crisis?” The last time she had called him it had been because she could not decide what color the table linens should be, and they had spent an hour discussing the merits of the different combinations.

Ji-Hyo laughed. “No. The table cloths and napkins and everything else are just fine. They’re all ready for March. I am definitely not changing my mind again.”

“You have no idea how happy I am to hear that,” Seunghyun drawled. “So if not table linens, what inspired you to call?”

“I wanted to invite you to something special,” she said nearly breathlessly. “Next week, on December 18th, we’re having the opening party for the new exhibit at the gallery. Can you come?”

He hesitated. “I wasn’t aware you were putting up a new exhibit. I can certainly try my best to be there. What time is the party?”

“It’s starting at seven. And please come, Seunghyun.” He could practically hear her begin to fidget on the other end of the phone line. “It’s important.”

His brow furrowed. Why was a gallery exhibit so important? And then it dawned on him: Ji-Hyo was probably debuting an original work in the show. She always got nervous releasing a new piece, and Daesung had always been by her side at the opening party to help comfort her. Seunghyun had taken up the role of comforter and pseudo-brother in the past couple of months. He was touched that Ji-Hyo would have come to rely on him similarly. “I will clear my schedule,” he promised. Even though it meant ditching Zico and his friends, Seunghyun was certain the blond could spare him for one evening. “I wouldn’t miss something important – especially this close to Christmas.”

Ji-Hyo chuckled and murmured, “Thank you, Seunghyun. Make sure you bring Mino with you. He’s been in the studio less often lately.”

A sly little smirk turned Seunghyun’s lips. “That’s because he’s being wooed by a certain baker.”

“What? He didn’t tell me he was dating anyone!” Ji-Hyo huffed. “I’ll need to smack him the next time I see him. I thought I meant more to him than this.”

“Well, they’re not dating… Yet. Mino has this weird rule that he won’t date someone until they’ve been out of a relationship for at least a month, and Taehyun has been trying to convince him for a month to bend the rule. So, to be a stubborn pain, Mino keeps putting him off even though it’s past the month mark. I think they’re either going to strangle each other or suddenly start making out like mad, at this rate.”

He could perfectly imagine the blank expression he just knew was on Ji-Hyo’s face. “He likes this guy but won’t date him because the guy wants to date him?” She scoffed. “You Chois make zero sense. I should just kick him the next time I see him. Clearly, he deserves it.”

“Mino is young,” Seunghyun murmured. “And I think he’s a bit afraid of getting serious about someone. But I hope he doesn’t hold back to the point that Taehyun decides to date someone else. It’d probably break Mino’s heart if he did.”

“You should talk to him,” Ji-Hyo all but ordered. “Of anyone, you can talk sense into him.”

Seunghyun snorted. “As if. I am horrible at relationships.”

“No, you were horrible at relationships,” the woman corrected. “Until our Daesungie taught you how to be better at them. Now you’re the guru-in-residence, whether you like it or not.”

The man’s heart clenched painfully at the reminder of Daesung. His beloved would not endorse Seunghyun’s relationship prowess – not with the way he was botching trying to move on. But, he could not tell Ji-Hyo about the abortive mess of a relationship he found himself engaged in. “I will try,” he sighed at last.

“Good. So two important things: the party next week on the 18th at seven and talking to Mino about his stupid life choices. If you accomplish those things, I will buy you that fancy ice cream you like. A whole gallon of it.”

“Deal,” he said immediately. “I will do whatever it takes to get the delicious ice cream.”

“I know, I know. That’s why I offered it, you idiot. I’ll talk to you later; Junsu sounds like he might be burning the chicken. Love you, Seunghyun!” With a beep, she was gone.

Seunghyun slowly lowered the phone from his ear and gazed down at it. “I love you too, Ji-Hyo.” He shook his head a little. “Even if you are insane.”

When Seunghyun crawled into bed that night, he took a long moment to breathe in the familiar scent of Daesung’s cologne. He had bought a new bottle the week before because he had used nearly all of what had remained in the nearly eight months since Daesung’s death. It was strange to think it had been so long since he had last seen the blond’s soft smile or heard the bright sound of his giggle. Seunghyun buried his face in Daesung’s pillow, letting himself imagine for a moment that the man was just in the shower – singing in that beautifully husky way of his – before coming to bed. For the past week, Seunghyun had imagined that scenario, trying to remember every last detail he could from their old ritual, before falling asleep. He could even almost call to mind the cedarwood scent of his beloved’s skin and the orange from his shampoo. Somehow, the recollections helped him sleep better than he ever had, and it lead to the most wonderful dreams.

As Seunghyun’s lids fell heavily shut, the angel curled up at his side smiled and brushed his fingertips across the man’s cheek. He had spent seven nights curled up around Seunghyun – hoping he would be more receptive to a positive influence in his sleep – and was grateful to find it was working at least a little. Seunghyun no longer had the deep bags under his eyes from tossing and turning each night, and he no longer cried his throat raw at the slightest provocation. There was a peace in being together like this, even if Seunghyun could not see or feel him.

And every night they lay together, Youngbae watched silently from the shadows.  His heart twitched ever-so-slightly at the look on the angel’s face: The amount of love and concern on his broad features reminded the demon of someone he used to know. It was perhaps too easy to imagine it was not the angel and his lover curled up in such a tender embrace, but someone who had sported unruly pink hair at the time wrapped tightly around a man with a black fauxhawk.  _Jiyong._ There was something about the way Daesung held Seunghyun that was inherently different, though. Perhaps it was his angelic abilities or the love he held for the man in his arms, but as Daesung would lay beside Seunghyun the room would begin to softly glow from the light that seemed to come from the pores of the blond’s skin. The light would slowly weave around Seunghyun – wrapping him in a cocoon of warmth – as he would begin to dream, protecting him from any of the influences Seungri or Taeyang might try to exert over him. And it made Youngbae wonder if there was not more in Seunghyun’s dreams than just happy feelings caused by the angel’s nearness. After Seungri’s nagging, the brunette had done his research on angels, and he had found that it was possible for an angel to actually appear in someone’s dreams – thought it was extremely rare and difficult for them to do so. If Daesung were capable of that, he wondered, what else could the baby angel do?

The day before the gallery opening, Mino and Seunghyun were seated in the familiar warmth of the NamCat bakery with twin chocolate cupcakes sitting on the plate in front of them – extra curls. Seunghyun’s brows lifted at the familiar sight. “This is your special this week?” He looked up at Taehyun, who seemed just a little nervous judging by the way his brows kept twitching.

“Yes. It’s a new cupcake I’m introducing.” He cleared his throat. “I hope you don’t mind.” Turning, he pointed to the menu board, where each order and its description was carefully written out on the chalk-paint wall. Seunghyun’s gaze flickered across the board, searching for what the man was pointing at, before he felt his heart trip in his chest. Under signature cupcakes there was a new entry:  _The Daesung – Our best chocolate cupcake with extra chocolate curls and a special chocolate ganache filling._ Without a word, Seunghyun rose and caught Taehyun in a bone-crushing hug.

After a long moment, Seunghyun murmured, “Daesung would love it. He always wanted something named after him.” The brunette released the young man and gave him a small smile. “And he always did consider your cupcake to be a masterpiece. I swear he would’ve eaten them every day if I’d let him.”

Taehyun chuckled, ducking his head to hide the pleased smile that turned his lips. “I’m glad you approve. I just…realized the other day that it really was his cupcake, so I should just name it for him. That way he’s still in my bakery every day.” The bell above the door rang as a mother came in, dragging her two children with her. “I’ll be back in a minute to check on you,” Taehyun promised before bustling away.

Seunghyun’s throat tightened, but he managed to maintain his smile. It was becoming easier to live with the pain, he thought. That, or he was just becoming numb to it. He carefully resumed his seat and began to peel the wrapper back from the cupcake. Across from him, Mino watched him like a hawk, brows furrowed and gaze intense. “Seunghyun, are you alright?”

The brunette looked up and laughed, even though his heart felt heavy. “I’d be better if you would just ask Taehyun on a date.” Picking off a chocolate curl, he stuck it on his tongue and let it begin to melt there.

Mino ran his thumbnail along the edge of the table. “I’m scared, Seunghyun,” he admitted softly. “Of – of getting too attached to him.”

Seunghyun snorted. “There’s no such thing.” He carefully picked up his fork and twisted it in his fingers. “It’s better to care about someone with all of your heart and lose them than to never experience love at all.”

“But what if we date for a month and then break up?” Moments like this reminded Seunghyun that his brother was still so young and inexperienced. It made some of the pain in his own heart ease a little. “I don’t know that I could stand it.”

“Mino, it’s okay to be scared. But…a month with him would be better than nothing, I think. Plus, you never know what will happen unless you actually give it a shot,” Seunghyun said, pointing at his brother with his fork for added emphasis. “He could be someone you could really love, if you let yourself.”

Mino groaned and took a huge bite of his cupcake to buy himself time to think of a witty comeback. As he chewed on the chocolatey goodness, his gaze slowly drifted over to follow Taehyun as he moved behind the counter. He smiled a little at the graceful way Taehyun held the bag of frosting between his long fingers and the lovely little furrow of concentration that had lodged itself between the man’s brows. Taehyun always made Mino want to draw – to capture his everyday beauty. “Skies, I’m so stupid,” he said at last. “What..what do you think I could ask him to?”

Seunghyun gave his brother a flat look. “For a Choi, you are rather slow,” he teased. “Don’t you have a piece in the exhibit opening tomorrow?”

The younger man nodded slowly, and then his eyes lit up with understanding. “The opening party! That would be pretty perfect, wouldn’t it?” Seunghyun just raised an eyebrow, causing a sheepish grin to turn Mino’s lips. “Okay, okay. I get it. Thank you, Guru Choi, for your wisdom.” He rolled his eyes playfully before sneaking over to rest his elbows on the counter. Mino could do this; he could ask Taehyun out. He just hoped the saucy brunette was still willing to go out with him!

While Mino spoke to Taehyun, the elder Choi took the chance to look at his phone. He frowned at the sight of a message from Zico. “You should come see me,” the message read. That was how Zico worked: He would inform Seunghyun when he was willing to see him, and he expected the man to materialize as soon as possible. It was rather exhausting, since Zico’s idea of a good time involved dancing, drinking, his rowdy friends, and the occasional mood enhancing drug slipped into a shot. Seunghyun sometimes wondered if the man had ever gotten past the freshman party mentality or if he still believed he was back in those days. He certainly lived like he was still twenty.

“Can’t,” Seunghyun messaged back. “I’m out with my brother.”

Zico’s reply was a pouty selca. Seunghyun frowned at the image; he remembered the last time he had received a message like that. His heart plunged with feelings of guilt as he closed the message from Zico and instead pulled up a thread he had not looked at since April. Tapping on the first image dated April 26th, he stared at the pout turning those wide, soft lips. Even the way Daesung’s eyebrows were furrowed was gentle – as though everything about the man was incapable of being hard or cruel. Then came the picture of Daesung pretending to be buried under a stack of papers. Seunghyun choked on a laugh. Daesung must have spent at least ten minutes setting that picture up; he knew how clumsy the blond had been. Picking up another chocolate curl, he popped it into his mouth as he read the next message: “I love you too, Seunghyunnie. Always and always and forever. I should be home in an hour.” If only Daesung had come home when he had said he would, he would still be alive, Seunghyun thought. And if he were still alive, everything would be as perfect as it had been before that awful day. Maybe then Seunghyun would deserve the man who had an angelic smile and a deep love of Doraemon. Maybe then he wouldn’t be a complete waste. Unable to help himself, Seunghyun clicked on the last message he had received from the love of his life: “Yeah. Hit a snag. Sorry to be so lame.” What awful last words, Seunghyun thought. An apology for something Daesung would never be. And then he gaze caught on the time stamp. His hand began to shake. 11:53 AM. That was within moments of when Daesung had been hit. The man must have been on his way out the door when Seunghyun’s question had arrived, and Daesung had been struck just after sending his apology. That meant Daesung had never read Seunghyun’s last declaration of love. That meant Daesung might have been able to dodge the car as it had careened towards him, if only he had not been looking down.

_It means his death is all your fault,_ a voice in the back of his mind whispered.  _If not for you, he would still be here._

Seunghyun left the bakery without another word – not even hearing as Mino called out his name.

The next evening, Ji-Hyo watched the clock as it ticked closer and closer to seven. Mino had arrived a few minutes before with a rather handsome brunette on his arm – a man he had introduced as Taehyun. Junsu was even there, working on setting up the last items needed for the exhibit introduction. Her parents and future-in-laws were happily waiting in the lobby with the other guests, and all of her artists had been accounted for. But Seunghyun was nowhere to be seen.

She had begun to pace, a feeling of deep anxiety settling into her bones, when a sudden figure came through the gallery doors. Seunghyun looked a bit worse for wear – his tie was crooked and his suit pants were slightly wrinkled – but he was at least there. Rushing to his side, Ji-Hyo caught him in a hug. “I’m so glad you could make it!” She smiled up at him. “And just in time, too.”

Seunghyun gave her a wan smile. “A promise is a promise,” he murmured, his voice strangely hoarse.

“Promise me, then, that you’ll go around the gallery with me. I would love to hear what you think of it.” Seunghyun gave a tired nod. “Thank you.” A quick kiss was pressed to his cheek before she moved to stand at the front of the room. “Thank you, everyone, for joining us this evening.” The crowd fell silent and turned towards her. “Tonight marks the opening of our newest exhibit, which I have entitled  _In Heaven._ I hope you all enjoy. After we move to the center of the exhibit, there will be a special performance and refreshments.” She bowed and moved to open the doors. “Welcome.”

Silently, Seunghyun drifted up to her side and offered her his arm. She smiled softly and took it, guiding him into the first portion of the exhibit. Rather than its normal white, the first room was painted black – even dark cloth covering the normally bright pine floors. On the first wall hung a large white canvas that was barren but for bright red splatters across it, which made it seem as though blood had been spilt on the otherwise pure surface. Seunghyun felt his blood begin to run cold. The other images did little to alleviate the feeling of dread building up in his chest: a skeletal statue made of twisted metal; paintings full of shadows and sorrow; even a picture of jars of embalming fluid. As they moved to the next room, Seunghyun relaxed slightly. The black gave way to the familiar white, and the deathly subjects faded. He noticed on one wall hung a bold piece of graffiti art that had the clear mark of Mino’s work in every bold line. His brother was standing in front of it with a broad smile even as Taehyun considered the piece with a thoughtful frown. The large piece of metal was painted to look like stylized gates that were a complex weave of gold and black – Mino’s signature colors. The gates seemed moments from opening, a hint of movement in every curled line of the piece. Walking over to Mino’s side, Seunghyun gave his shoulder a squeeze with his free hand. “It’s beautiful.”

Mino grinned. “Thank you, Seunghyun. I’m –“ he hesitated, “Thank you for coming.” He gave his brother a quick side-hug before stepping back. “You’ll have to tell me what your favorite piece is. When you’ve made it all the way through.”

Seunghyun managed to nod. “We can talk about it after,” he assured his brother. “If Taehyun and I can convince you to leave the refreshments, that is.”

That comment made Taehyun laugh easily. “Oh, I am sure we’ll manage. Mino has a lot of self-control, when he wants to.” The pair shared a look that made Seunghyun laugh. His brother was whipped already, he thought. It was precious.

“Then I will find you as soon as I have a glass of wine. By the way, Taehyun, have you met Ji-Hyo?” He motioned to the woman at his side.

“We met briefly before you came,” Ji-Hyo said easily. “Mino introduced him as his date.” Her dark eyes sparkled with impish humor at the blush that colored Mino’s cheeks.

“Our little Mino-ya is growing up,” Seunghyun sighed. “Whatever will we do with him?”

“Give him a terrible time,” Ji-Hyo said with a grin.

“So how did you two meet,” Taehyun asked Ji-Hyo and Seunghyun, trying to save Mino from their teasing.

The man smiled faintly down at Ji-Hyo. “She’s practically family to me and Mino. But she was the first person to buy one of Mino’s paintings. When he became a regular studio artist here, we met at a dinner party she held in honor of the occasion.”

“Though, I was always surprised we didn’t meet sooner,” Ji-Hyo added. “Considering he was mooning after my brother and all.”

Taehyun’s droopy brows lifted in surprise. “You’re Daesung’s sister?” She nodded with a shy smile. “Mino, you need to bring her past the bakery!” He pinched the man at his side.

“I will,” the brunette promised, laughing. “As soon as I can convince her to. Maybe you should just bake her wedding cake for her. She and Junsu are getting married in March.”

Ji-Hyo’s eyes became wide. “You’re a baker? Wait, are you  _the_ baker Daesung and Seunghyun always raved about?” This time, it was Taehyun’s turn to give a shy nod. “Daesung told me I should have you bake my cake almost the moment he knew I was engaged! I will have to stop past soon to taste your food!”

“Come by Monday and I’ll let you do a cake tasting,” Taehyun promised. “Bring Junsu with you. If you like it, I’m sure we can work something out.”

The sound of bright, happy laughter filled the gallery as Ji-Hyo continued to talk to Taehyun about her upcoming nuptials. While she was distracted, Seunghyun continued to wander the gallery. He noticed that the exhibit was slowly spiraling inwards rather than being as open as it normally was. It was strange, but the change of pace was nice. When he turned the very last corner, though, he was struck by the silence. Many of the artists and other patrons had found seats in the chairs set up in front of the featured piece at the heart of the gallery. Off to one side of the behemoth canvas was a piano, a guitar, and two stools. Seunghyun frowned; those were unusual additions to the gallery. And then his gaze came rest on the ten foot by fourteen foot canvas.

His knees felt weak as Seunghyun slowly approached the piece – his eyes trying to take in all of the details at once. Ji-Hyo’s ability to capture lifelike detail was almost unmatched, but this time she had bent her formidable skill into creating a work that was hauntingly ethereal. The background was a warm black – like the perfect summer night – scattered with golden globes of light. It was as though someone had caught the stars and placed them in lanterns strung across the sky. The number of globes increased the closer the eye came to the figure in the center of the painting, almost as though they were creating a golden halo around him. Seunghyun’s gaze trailed up at last to take in the glorious figure at the heart of the canvas. Every detail from the familiar curve of the jaw to the breadth of the nose to the sweep of blond hair across the brow was achingly realistic; Seunghyun wondered if he could reach out and touch the beautiful tan skin only to find it warm with life. The only thing that broke the image of reality were the giant, white wings that stretched from the man’s back – dominating the painting with their powerful beauty. Daesung was an angel.

Tears poured their way down Seunghyun’s cheeks at the sight of his lover in such an achingly perfect state. Of course Daesung would be an angel. He had been nothing but good and kind and forgiving his entire life. It was as though Ji-Hyo had captured perfectly the essence of her brother, even in death. Seunghyun felt a soft hand on his arm, and he glanced down to find Ji-Hyo beside him. “One night,” she murmured, “I was in my office. I felt hopeless – like my heart would never heal. And, suddenly, the room seemed to brighten. I looked up, and I could swear I saw him…looking just like this.” She took her bottom lip between her teeth, chewing on it as she fought back her tears. “He asked me to do this exhibit. And as soon as the moment was over, I started on this painting. I couldn’t get the image out of my head - though I added the wings for extra drama.”

Seunghyun sucked in a deep breath. “Do you think…he’s still out there, somewhere?”

She leaned her cheek against Seunghyun’s arm. “I know he is, Seunghyun. Can’t you feel him with us still?”

The brunette hesitated. Could he? He could sometimes feel the warmth of another body next to him and had been dreaming of Daesung. But, did that mean that the man was still with them? Seunghyun wanted to believe, but he just did not know if he could. And even if Daesung were an angel, Seunghyun would never be worthy of being with him again. He was too far gone to be saved, he thought. “The painting is beautiful, Ji-Hyo. It’s perfect.”

Ji-Hyo gave his hand a squeeze. “Why don’t you sit down? I have to go do the introduction.” She pointed to a chair off to the side that had an uninterrupted view of the painting. Seunghyun inclined his head before moving to settle in the indicated seat. He sighed as his gaze continued to rove over the hauntingly beautiful portrait of his dead lover. Daesung had always been too good for him, but this just made the differences between them too painfully clear. He half wondered if Ji-Hyo could do a companion piece with Seunghyun painted as a demon – it’d be both fitting and striking.

“Thank you all for coming this evening,” Ji-Hyo said, her voice breaking through Seunghyun’s thoughts. “I appreciate your help and support tonight, especially since I know you are each busy preparing for Christmas and the other holidays coming up so soon. But this exhibit is a particularly tender one – one that is very close to my heart. Many of you know I lost my baby brother, Daesung, in April. Losing him was like losing a piece of my soul; he and I were practically the same person we were so close.” She hesitated as her gaze caught on her parents. Seunghyun could remember how the Kangs had responded to Daesung coming out to them: His father had declared that his son was dead to him, and his mother had not spoken to him since. It had nearly destroyed Daesung. But, now both of his parents were openly weeping. Seunghyun realized he had not once considered how they must have taken the loss of their only son. Even if they had disowned him, the beautiful blond had still been part of their family. Daesung had even wanted to try reconciling with them – he had told Seunghyun he thought his parents were ready. But now they would never know for certain if peace would have been forged between them. Daesung was gone.

“When I thought of how to best commemorate his life and celebrate his goodness, this exhibit came to mind. It begins at the point of death – a place of darkness and sorrow – before moving to the gates of heaven itself. After that, the viewer is able to experience the joys of heaven and hopefully have their hurts eased, as though given an angelic touch to the heart.” Ji-Hyo took a steadying breath. “To conclude, I have asked my beloved fiancé Junsu to perform a song that shares the same name as the exhibit:  _In Heaven._ ”

She bowed and gestured to Junsu, who had taken a seat on one of the stools. Seated beside him, holding the guitar, was Seungyoon – Mino had recommended him when Junsu had asked after guitarists. And at the piano behind them sat one of the musicians Junsu wrote music for, a young man named Minjun. Junsu licked his bottom lip before nodding for the pair to begin playing. As the man [sang ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yAeSxeBcCeY)about love and loss, Seunghyun felt his heart ache with that familiar longing to be with Daesung. Even if he was not worthy, he thought, he still wanted to see him - even if it was just one last time. His life was incomplete without Daesung; nothing could fill the void in his heart. 

And all he could hear echoing in his ears as he went to bed that night were the repeated lyrics from Junsu's song:

> Don’t leave, don’t leave- can’t you stay?  
> Lies, lies, I don’t hear anything  
> I love you, I love you- can’t you show me?  
> Can’t you love me, love me, love me?  
> Don’t leave, don’t leave- can’t you stay?  
> Lies, lies, I don’t hear anything  
> I love you, I love you- can’t you show me?  
> Please come back

From where he stood beside the younger angel, Jiyong frowned. "Six days. We've only got six days." He ran his spindly fingers through his hair. "How are we going to save him in just six days?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I think this chapter was the hardest to write so far. I know so much about how the next chapters play out that this one wrestled with me quite a bit. I hope I did not move too quickly and that it all made sense. (And hopefully it's not too hard to read.) You'll notice that the song in this chapter - JYJ's In Heaven (watch the video, for reals) - was the major inspiration for this fic. Originally I was going to follow the plot of the video more closely, having the dead lover come back and whatnot. But, as I thought about it, I changed my mind. I kept a lot of references to the video, though, like Junsu and Ji-Hyo being together because I love the song and the mv so stinking much. And, really, my muse deserves its tribute.
> 
> Now, real talk. The next chapter deals with a lot of trigger warning stuff - like suicide. However, because I know some of you can't/don't read things that deal with that sort of subject matter, I will also post a version of the chapter that has the triggers removed (basically it will include little recaps so you get the gist of what was going on in certain scenes). That way you can get the important plot points without having to deal with the triggery stuff as much. So when I post the next chapter, feel free to pick whichever version of the chapter you can best handle. -thumbs up- 
> 
> As always, I'd love to hear from you in the comments. What do you think the next chapter is going to bring? Do you think Seunghyun can be saved?


	14. (TW) Please End This, End Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seunghyun can't do it anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remember, this is the version of the chapter that includes the full details and some potentially triggering stuff involving suicide and self-harm. If you can't handle that, the next chapter is a stripped down version that does not have the more triggery bits.

It had been the painting that had made him realize how little his life meant without Daesung. He thought if he could just see Daesung one more time – tell him how much he loved him – that’d be enough. The man knew, though, that his wish was impossible…except that he remembered the stories. Those who came back from near-death experiences reported seeing their deceased loved ones and being able to speak with them. A wild sort of hope had grown root in Seunghyun’s heart: If he died, he might at least be able to say a proper goodbye to Daesung before he was taken off to whatever punishment his sins warranted. And the only way to accomplish that was if he took his own life.

When the thought had first occurred to him in the weeks directly following Daesung’s death, he had pushed it aside because Mino needed him. He knew that his brother would be left alone in the world without him, and that thought had been enough to keep Seunghyun going. But as things had become more difficult, Seunghyun struggled to maintain the will to keep fighting – to live on without Daesung. The feelings of guilt and self-hatred had only magnified the intensity of his thoughts, and by the time the gallery opening came about it was too, too much. Besides, Seunghyun rationalized, Mino had someone else now: Taehyun. The baker would take good care of Mino, as would Ji-Hyo and Junsu. He would be missed, sure, but he had to do what was best for himself. Surely they would understand his actions.

At first, he thought the easiest way would be by slitting his wrists. He had heard that was efficient, and he even had really sharp knives in the kitchen thanks to Daesung’s love of cooking. But then he had considered the mess that much blood would make. Even if he did it in the tub, there would still be a lot still left to clean up after his death – and he just knew Mino would be the one who would have to do the cleaning. Seunghyun wanted to die, certainly, but not in a way that would make his brother’s life any harder. As he continued to think over the methods, Seunghyun began to pack his things. Sentimental items were tucked carefully into a box together – so Mino could go through them to see if he wanted to keep any tokens of his brother – while valuable items were packed in separate boxes that denoted their worth and where to sell them. Daesung’s affects were carefully packed in separate boxes and labeled, in case Ji-Hyo or their family wanted to keep them. He thought it would be best if their families had to do as little packing and sorting as possible; this way was more efficient and neater.

Hanging sounded like a good idea at first thought, but then Seunghyun had started actually looking around his apartment. Nowhere in the flat had a suitable hook or bar that was high enough off the ground to do the job quickly, and he dreaded a slow asphyxiation. It sounded painful, based on the descriptions he had read. And then there was the issue of how his face would look in death: bloated and purple. He couldn’t subject Mino to that, because it would undoubtedly be his brother who found his body. The perfect idea came to him as he lay in bed, the scent of Daesung wafting comfortingly around him. If he took enough pills – he could research what was best – he could die in bed, as though he were just going to sleep. It would be the gentlest way to go, and to Mino it would just look like he had passed during the night, at least until the toxicology reports came back. He smiled to himself just before drifting off; it was the perfect solution.

He finished packing the last box on the day before Christmas Eve – Daesung’s favorite holiday. The man found it somewhat ironic that he was going to be able to end his life on a day that had normally meant so much good. It had almost always begun with Daesung waking him, a tray of buttery pancakes in hand, before they would spend the afternoon with Mino. He and Daesung would then decorate their little Christmas tree before making a scrumptious dinner together. At night they would then give each other the first gift of Christmas (usually ridiculous pajamas) before cuddling up with Daesung’s favorite Christmas movie ( _The Bishop’s Wife_ ) and a big bowl of caramel popcorn. They’d then don their new pajamas before collapsing into bed, kissing and whispering their secret wishes to each other until they fell asleep.

But that Christmas Eve would be different.

In order to make certain he was gone before Mino would drop past that afternoon, Seunghyun had woken up early and raided the medicine cabinet. He lined up his options on the counter and gave something of a mental shrug; he’d try them all. Carefully, he ground up all of Daesung’s anti-depressants, his sleeping aids, all of their pain pills, and all of the other random medicine that looked like it might do the job. Once he had his little cocktail ready, he opened a bottle of whiskey and poured the mix inside. He then shook it, allowing the pills to dissolve. At eight in the morning, he sat down on the edge of the bed and poured himself a glass with a trembling hand.

It was at that moment that war officially broke out in Seunghyun’s room. Jiyong and Daesung stood on either side of Seunghyun – waiting for the demons to arrive. The curious thing about suicides were that they could only be completed if the forces of evil managed to make it past the angels; a human could not kill themselves on their own. As long as Seunghyun survived until eight-thirty, the window scheduled for his suicide would close, and the demons would fail to claim his soul. Instead, he would die later in the day and proceed to heaven, where he would be able to be with Daesung. And the young angel was prepared to do anything he had to in order to defend his beloved from the demons. He would save Seunghyun's soul.

When Seungri came sauntering into the room, it visibly darkened in the face of his malevolence. Shadows stretched deeper into the room even as the air itself became oppressive, as though they stood in a mausoleum instead of a bedroom. Behind him came an oddly pale Youngbae, he lacked all of his usual swagger and pomp. If anything, it looked as though the demon trainee was a man being forced to go on a shopping expedition instead of staying at home to watch his favorite team play. Jiyong stood a little straighter at the sight of him; he was ready to help Daesung in any way he could.

“If it ain’t the ugly baby angel,” Seungri laughed. “You might as well just step aside and make this easy. There is no way your stupid lover is going to make it. He’s completely given up on himself, which means he’s ours.”

Daesung met Seungri’s gaze before turning his attention to Youngbae. “You don’t have to do this,” he said, his voice ringing with power. “You have the ability to stop this here and now, Youngbae.”

The demon’s gaze lifted to meet Daesung’s for a brief moment. Youngbae knew that it was technically his job to reap Seunghyun’s soul – he was the trainee – and the thought of endless torment would certainly be a good enough motivation to finish the task. Seungri had made it excruciatingly clear what would happen if he failed in this task, and it had made him tremble in fear just thinking of the punishments that would await him if Seunghyun went to heaven. He shook his head, trying to throw off the mesmerizing influence of the angel’s voice.

“Bae,” Jiyong murmured, his voice surprisingly gentle. “Please spare Seunghyun. I know…I know I made a lot of mistakes. You have every right to be upset at me – to hate me – but please don’t take it out on Seunghyun. He’s completely innocent in this. If you want to hurt someone, hurt me. I deserve it. When I should have fought my hardest for you, I was not strong enough to do anything. The day you died, I should’ve just kicked that in the balls,” he jerked his chin towards Seungri, “and never let you go.”

Youngbae began to tremble. “You didn’t love me, Jiyong. Stop trying to pretend you did,” he bit out.

“You’re the only person I’ve ever loved, Dong Youngbae,” Jiyong protested, his voice dropping to a low whisper. “I wanted to make enough money to get us both out of there, so we could go somewhere safe. Selling myself seemed like a small price to pay if it meant saving someone as precious and pure as you. But I made a lot of mistakes – mistakes that got us both killed. I –“ he choked a little on his tears, “I am so sorry I was not the man you needed me to be. I am sorry I did not tell you every day how much I loved and needed you. And I am sorry I left you alone. Please forgive me.”

Youngbae and Jiyong gazed deeply into each other’s eyes. As the moments stretched on, there were the slightest changes in their body language. Jiyong stood a little taller, Youngbae’s shoulders relaxed, a tiny smile teased onto the angel’s lips, and the demon ducked his head slightly – almost shyly. Daesung’s heart began to pound rapidly in the remembered motion of excitement as Youngbae took a slow step towards Jiyong. “I forgive you, Ji.”

Hearing those words, Jiyong laughed happily and moved to take Youngbae into his arms. Before the pair could reach one another, though, Seungri’s expression turned murderous and he snapped his fingers. Thick black chains appeared around Youngbae’s body and crushed his limbs together, causing the demon to topple to the floor. “I think not,” Seungri hissed. “I will deal with you when I get home, fool.” Another wave of his hand made Youngbae vanish, chains and all.

Jiyong gaped at the barren patch of floor. “What have you done with him? Return him this instance!” the angel snapped.

“Yeah, no.” Seungri gave the angel a flat look. “See, a demon has to meet a certain quota of stolen souls or else they get punished. Your stupid little Youngbae was too soft and couldn’t do it. So, now he gets to rot in the really unpleasant part of Hell where they torture people from now until the end of time. I think his torture is going to involve barbed wire and fire, since those are his two favorite things. Because of you, dear Jiyong, he is literally going to spend eternity experiencing the sort of excruciating agony that would kill a mortal. I think it is fitting that you’ve damned him twice.”

“Silence,” Daesung said, his voice cutting Seungri’s words off like a sword. Moving confidently, the angel grabbed Jiyong and pulled him to his side. “Seungri, you have interfered enough. Leave, or else I will be forced to deal with you.” With each word he spoke, Daesung began to glow – this time a nearly white light beginning to gather about him. Slowly, the shadows were pushed back. Behind him, Seunghyun sat the still full glass of whiskey on the bedside table.

Acting on an impulse, Jiyong rushed to Seunghyun’s side and wrapped his arms tightly around the man. He tried to pour every positive feeling into the contact possible. If anything would keep Seunghyun from killing himself, it was an angelic touch. And Daesung was a bit too busy to offer that comfort himself.

A tense silence filled the room as shadow and light met – fighting to dominant the space. Seungri’s malicious beauty was stark against the deepening black that surrounded him while Daesung’s radiance made it seem as though a small sun had risen in the room. As the battle of wills intensified, Seungri took a slow step forward and lifted a hand towards the ceiling. The shadows writhed, curling and twisting, until they resolved themselves into the shape of a horrible black sword in his hand. It was a dreadful thing that seemed to suck the light into it, creating such perfect darkness that it was black against even the horrible shadows the demon cast. Seungri tested it in in the air – cutting sharply in the direction of the angels. “I think I will rend you to pieces,” he said, his tone cheerful. “And then I’ll take your lover. Sounds like the perfect day to me, getting rid of such a thorn in my side and getting a new pet.”

Daesung did not so much as flinch. His features were schooled into an expression of absolute calm as he watched the demon approach. “Not today, demon. Not today; not ever.” The light around his hand began to concentrate until it formed a long, curved shape in his hand – resolving at last into a sword made of bright blue flames. Glancing downwards, the angel was surprised to find himself suddenly armed; this situation had not been outlined in the manual Jiyong had made him read. But the steady weight of the weapon and flickering heat of the flames felt right in his grip. His gaze lifted to clash with Seungri’s once more.

In a swift motion, Seungri lunged forward – his sword raised high above his head and brought down towards Daesung with frightening speed. The angel lifted his blade in a smooth motion, deflecting the attack to the side. He stepped in quickly and used the hilt of his sword to punch Seungri in the jaw. Stumbling back, the demon growled unearthly curses that made the angel’s ears burn with their profanity. Daesung held his weapon at the ready, waiting patiently, while Seungri collected himself; the stumble had been a ruse meant to draw Daesung close, and the angel had not fallen for it. Seungri spat out his black blood before turning a cruel smile on Daesung. The baby angel deserved to die slowly, but in the given circumstances Seungri was willing to end it quickly. He did not have time to waste on games. Moving in once more, he swiped at the angel, only to find the move parried. The pair began a furious dance of exchanged blows as they moved about the room – flame and darkness biting one another.

It was as Seungri nicked Daesung’s arm with the tip of his blade that Jiyong registered a very important detail: Seunghyun could see the fight. When Daesung was injured, Seunghyun’s breath had caught. Jiyong looked down to find the human’s gaze locked on the battle, and a sweat had begun to gather across his brow. He paled when Daesung stumbled – Seungri having knocked his feet out from beneath him – and let out a breath when the angel had successfully disengaged an attack meant to pierce his heart. Jiyong held Seunghyun a little closer. “Don’t worry, Seunghyun. The baby angel’s got this. If anyone can win, it’s Daesung.” And, for just a moment, it seemed as though Seunghyun had looked up at him.

Seungri chuckled breathlessly. “Look at you, baby angel. You’ve got such fight! I’m almost sad I am going to tear you apart.” When Daesung did not respond, the demon hissed at him and lunged forward once more, his blade snaking out to find flesh.

With a quick twist of his blade, Daesung had wrapped his weapon around Seungri’s in a tight bind. The demon attempted to yank it back only to find it firmly trapped. Daesung met his gaze – his dark eyes seeming to burn with an internal flame – before he snapped his wrist in a quick movement. Seungri’s fingers were suddenly empty as the blade flew through the air in a delicate arch before landing in Daesung’s waiting hand. At first, the darkness seemed to bite into Daesung’s flesh, making him wince at the agony it caused. But then, slowly, the blade seemed to tremble and shudder in his grip. Jiyong’s gaze affixed to the sword as it continued to writhe in Daesung’s hand, and he gasped when he noticed tendrils of silver moving up from the hilt. It looked as though rivulets of moonlight were pouring down the blade, and everywhere they touched the darkness vanished. In a few moments, the entire weapon was a pure silver that reflected the brightness of the angel who held it, and the sword fell still in his grip at last. Daesung let out a slow breath and eased his grip on the hilt.

The demon took a stumbling step backwards. “W-what have you done to my sword?”

Mimicking the slicing motions Seungri had made earlier, Daesung let the sword taste the air as he swung it smoothly about. “It has been purified.” His gaze snapped up to meet Seungri’s eyes. “The time for your destruction has come, Lee Seunghyun. You have lead astray many of the children of the Most High, and for that unforgivable crime you will face the ultimate undoing. The material of your soul will be returned to the fount from whence it came, and you will cease to be. Such is the punishment for squandering the great gift of life you were given; such is the mercy you will be shown.” As Daesung stepped towards the quaking demon lord, the light about him concentrated yet again: this time on his back. Feathers made of pure silver light spilled down Daesung’s back to form into two great wings that trailed lightly along the ground behind him, crackling with the divine energy that raced along each feather’s spine. The angel’s brilliant wings stretched wide as he brought the two swords together, crossing them near the hilt, as he loomed over the fallen shape of Seungri’s body. “Sin no more.” And with that, Daesung brought the swords out to the side – slicing cleaning through the demon’s neck – before plunging both blades into his body. An unearthly shriek pierced the air as the body turned into curling black mist that dissipated as the bright light radiating from Daesung’s body touched it.

Daesung let out a trembling breath and turned to look at Jiyong and Seunghuyn.

“…Daesung?”

The angel’s fingers went limp at the sound of Seunghyun’s voice, and the swords fell to the hardwood with a clatter. “Seunghyun?” Jiyong only just managed to stumble out of the way before Daesung had wrapped Seunghyun tightly in his grip – his wings stretched out behind him. A soft sigh slid past Daesung’s lips as he felt the familiar warmth of Seunghyun’s fingertips lightly exploring the curve of his jaw. “Seunghyun, you’re safe. Thank God.”

“I don’t understand,” Seunghyun stuttered. “W-what is going on?”

“It must be the moment of grace,” Jiyong murmured.

Daesung nodded. It seemed like the only reasonable answer. “When people are going to die, they’re allowed to see the angel that comes for them.” He pulled back enough to look into Seunghyun’s eyes. “I’ve been with you all along, love. Fighting to keep you safe - to save your soul.”

A troubled look crossed Seunghyun’s features. “You saw everything I did?”

The angel sank onto the bed beside Seunghyun and held him close. “I did." His hand curled hand about the brunette's strong jaw. "And I love you even more now than the day I died.”

Surprise colored Seunghyun’s features as his mouth dropped open and his eyes became wide. “Y-you do? But how? After everything I’ve done, you should hate me.”

Leaning close, Daesung smiled. “You took care of Mino, helped Ji-Hyo and Junsu get back together, showed how much you loved me, and even helped with planning the wedding. The other things you did are nothing compared to that, Seunghyun…as long as you promise me two things.”

Seunghyun took a steadying breath, trying to comprehend what he was seeing and experience. “What?” he finally mumbled.

“Promise me you will never give up on yourself, Seunghyun. As long as you believe we can be together again – as long as you believe you can be redeemed – we can be together when you die.” He brushed Seunghyun’s bangs out of his eyes. “Can you promise me you’ll do that?”

“I promise,” Seunghyun murmured. “And…the second one?"

Daesung laughed a little. "Ditch Zico. He's terrible, and you deserve better."

Seunghyun hung his head. "I promise I won't go near him again." He hesitated. "And in return, you’ll wait for me?”

“Whether it’s an hour or a hundred years, I’ll be at your side. I love you, Seunghyun.” And Daesung would never admit it, but tears traced down his cheeks as a perfect smile turned Seunghyun’s lips.

“I love you, Daesung. Always and always and –“

“Forever,” Daesung ended. He then brought their lips together for a soft, perfect caress. Brilliant light flooded the entire room, banishing all of the darkness, as the angel poured his heart into the innocent contact. When he pulled back, he sighed softly. “When the time is right, we’ll be together again. Trust in that. Trust in me. Alright?”

Seunghyun clung tighter to Daesung. “Do you have to go?”

The angel nodded. “I do. Someone else needs me.” He looked over at Jiyong for a brief moment before returning his attention to his beloved. “And your moment of grace is just about up. But… every time you go to sleep, I will be there with you, Seunghyun. And when you eat at the NamCat. And when you go to the wedding. I will always be with you.” He pressed a last kiss to Seunghyun’s forehead before standing – slowly fading from Seunghyun’s mortal sight.

Before Daesung could so much as utter another word, another angel appeared. This angel was different: Where Jiyong and Jaejoong were slim and beautiful, this angel was muscular and seemed to radiate a sort of exuberant energy. He all but beamed at Daesung, who was carefully picking both swords off the floor. “Kang Daesung?” The blond nodded. “Captain Ok Taecyeon, at your service. I have been sent by the High Seraphim, Commander of the Armies of Heaven, Lee Chaerin, to collect you.”

Daesung stared at the stranger. “Ji, who is he talking about.”

“The seraphim, Daesung. The highest order of angels – the ones who guard the boss and make sure that the rest of the heavenly hosts are doing their job,” Jiyong said, shooting a look at the unfamiliar angel.

Daesung nodded slightly. “I see. Well, the seraphim are just going to have to wait.” Taecyeon gaped at the blond even as he sheathed the two swords in the scabbards he had summoned. “Jiyong and I have some unfinished business, and we are running on a very tight schedule.”

“What could you have to do that is more important than answer the summons?” Taecyeon stuttered.

A wide smile tugged the blond’s lips. “If Seunghyun were to commit suicide and go to Hell, he would have died by now. But, there is a second time slot later in the day – one where he dies nobly and goes to Heaven. Between now and then, Jiyong and I need to run a quick errand down in Hell.”

This time, it was Jiyong’s turn to gape at Daesung. “In Hell? What are you talking about, Daesung?”

Going to Jiyong’s side, the younger angel gave his shoulder a squeeze. “We’re going to get Youngbae.”


	15. Please End This, End Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Seunghyun can't do this anymore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a reminder, this is the version of the story that has the most triggery bits stripped down as much as possible. What remains is a bit violent, but it is a battle between a demon and an angel...Violence is a thing that happens in those instances.

[Basically, Seunghyun contemplates how he should commit suicide. He wants to see Daesung again and thinks killing himself is the only way. He eventually decides on using a cocktail of pills, which he prepares and mixes with whiskey. At the moment he sits down to drink….]

It was at that moment that war officially broke out in Seunghyun’s room. Jiyong and Daesung stood on either side of Seunghyun – waiting for the demons to arrive. The curious thing about suicides were that they could only be completed if the forces of evil managed to make it past the angels; a human could not kill themselves on their own. As long as Seunghyun survived until eight-thirty, the window scheduled for his suicide would close, and the demons would fail to claim his soul. Instead, he would die later in the day and proceed to heaven, where he would be able to be with Daesung. And the young angel was prepared to do anything he had to in order to defend his beloved from the demons. He would save Seunghyun's soul.

When Seungri came sauntering into the room, it visibly darkened in the face of his malevolence. Shadows stretched deeper into the room even as the air itself became oppressive, as though they stood in a mausoleum instead of a bedroom. Behind him came an oddly pale Youngbae, he lacked all of his usual swagger and pomp. If anything, it looked as though the demon trainee was a man being forced to go on a shopping expedition instead of staying at home to watch his favorite team play. Jiyong stood a little straighter at the sight of him; he was ready to help Daesung in any way he could.

“If it ain’t the ugly baby angel,” Seungri laughed. “You might as well just step aside and make this easy. There is no way your stupid lover is going to make it. He’s completely given up on himself, which means he’s ours.”

Daesung met Seungri’s gaze before turning his attention to Youngbae. “You don’t have to do this,” he said, his voice ringing with power. “You have the ability to stop this here and now, Youngbae.”

The demon’s gaze lifted to meet Daesung’s for a brief moment. Youngbae knew that it was technically his job to reap Seunghyun’s soul – he was the trainee – and the thought of endless torment would certainly be a good enough motivation to finish the task. Seungri had made it excruciatingly clear what would happen if he failed in this task, and it had made him tremble in fear just thinking of the punishments that would await him if Seunghyun went to heaven. He shook his head, trying to throw off the mesmerizing influence of the angel’s voice.

“Bae,” Jiyong murmured, his voice surprisingly gentle. “Please spare Seunghyun. I know…I know I made a lot of mistakes. You have every right to be upset at me – to hate me – but please don’t take it out on Seunghyun. He’s completely innocent in this. If you want to hurt someone, hurt me. I deserve it. When I should have fought my hardest for you, I was not strong enough to do anything. The day you died, I should’ve just kicked that in the balls,” he jerked his chin towards Seungri, “and never let you go.”

Youngbae began to tremble. “You didn’t love me, Jiyong. Stop trying to pretend you did,” he bit out.

“You’re the only person I’ve ever loved, Dong Youngbae,” Jiyong protested, his voice dropping to a low whisper. “I wanted to make enough money to get us both out of there, so we could go somewhere safe. Selling myself seemed like a small price to pay if it meant saving someone as precious and pure as you. But I made a lot of mistakes – mistakes that got us both killed. I –“ he choked a little on his tears, “I am so sorry I was not the man you needed me to be. I am sorry I did not tell you every day how much I loved and needed you. And I am sorry I left you alone. Please forgive me.”

Youngbae and Jiyong gazed deeply into each other’s eyes. As the moments stretched on, there were the slightest changes in their body language. Jiyong stood a little taller, Youngbae’s shoulders relaxed, a tiny smile teased onto the angel’s lips, and the demon ducked his head slightly – almost shyly. Daesung’s heart began to pound rapidly in the remembered motion of excitement as Youngbae took a slow step towards Jiyong. “I forgive you, Ji.”

Hearing those words, Jiyong laughed happily and moved to take Youngbae into his arms. Before the pair could reach one another, though, Seungri’s expression turned murderous and he snapped his fingers. Thick black chains appeared around Youngbae’s body and crushed his limbs together, causing the demon to topple to the floor. “I think not,” Seungri hissed. “I will deal with you when I get home, fool.” Another wave of his hand made Youngbae vanish, chains and all.

Jiyong gaped at the barren patch of floor. “What have you done with him? Return him this instance!” the angel snapped.

“Yeah, no.” Seungri gave the angel a flat look. “See, a demon has to meet a certain quota of stolen souls or else they get punished. Your stupid little Youngbae was too soft and couldn’t do it. So, now he gets to rot in the really unpleasant part of Hell where they torture people from now until the end of time. I think his torture is going to involve barbed wire and fire, since those are his two favorite things. Because of you, dear Jiyong, he is literally going to spend eternity experiencing the sort of excruciating agony that would kill a mortal. I think it is fitting that you’ve damned him twice.”

“Silence,” Daesung said, his voice cutting Seungri’s words off like a sword. Moving confidently, the angel grabbed Jiyong and pulled him to his side. “Seungri, you have interfered enough. Leave, or else I will be forced to deal with you.” With each word he spoke, Daesung began to glow – this time a nearly white light beginning to gather about him. Slowly, the shadows were pushed back. Behind him, Seunghyun sat the still full glass of whiskey on the bedside table.

Acting on an impulse, Jiyong rushed to Seunghyun’s side and wrapped his arms tightly around the man. He tried to pour every positive feeling into the contact possible. If anything would keep Seunghyun from killing himself, it was an angelic touch. And Daesung was a bit too busy to offer that comfort himself.

A tense silence filled the room as shadow and light met – fighting to dominant the space. Seungri’s malicious beauty was stark against the deepening black that surrounded him while Daesung’s radiance made it seem as though a small sun had risen in the room. As the battle of wills intensified, Seungri took a slow step forward and lifted a hand towards the ceiling. The shadows writhed, curling and twisting, until they resolved themselves into the shape of a horrible black sword in his hand. It was a dreadful thing that seemed to suck the light into it, creating such perfect darkness that it was black against even the horrible shadows the demon cast. Seungri tested it in in the air – cutting sharply in the direction of the angels. “I think I will rend you to pieces,” he said, his tone cheerful. “And then I’ll take your lover. Sounds like the perfect day to me, getting rid of such a thorn in my side and getting a new pet.”

Daesung did not so much as flinch. His features were schooled into an expression of absolute calm as he watched the demon approach. “Not today, demon. Not today; not ever.” The light around his hand began to concentrate until it formed a long, curved shape in his hand – resolving at last into a sword made of bright blue flames. Glancing downwards, the angel was surprised to find himself suddenly armed; this situation had not been outlined in the manual Jiyong had made him read. But the steady weight of the weapon and flickering heat of the flames felt right in his grip. His gaze lifted to clash with Seungri’s once more.

In a swift motion, Seungri lunged forward – his sword raised high above his head and brought down towards Daesung with frightening speed. The angel lifted his blade in a smooth motion, deflecting the attack to the side. He stepped in quickly and used the hilt of his sword to punch Seungri in the jaw. Stumbling back, the demon growled unearthly curses that made the angel’s ears burn with their profanity. Daesung held his weapon at the ready, waiting patiently, while Seungri collected himself; the stumble had been a ruse meant to draw Daesung close, and the angel had not fallen for it. Seungri spat out his black blood before turning a cruel smile on Daesung. The baby angel deserved to die slowly, but in the given circumstances Seungri was willing to end it quickly. He did not have time to waste on games. Moving in once more, he swiped at the angel, only to find the move parried. The pair began a furious dance of exchanged blows as they moved about the room – flame and darkness biting one another.

It was as Seungri nicked Daesung’s arm with the tip of his blade that Jiyong registered a very important detail: Seunghyun could see the fight. When Daesung was injured, Seunghyun’s breath had caught. Jiyong looked down to find the human’s gaze locked on the battle, and a sweat had begun to gather across his brow. He paled when Daesung stumbled – Seungri having knocked his feet out from beneath him – and let out a breath when the angel had successfully disengaged an attack meant to pierce his heart. Jiyong held Seunghyun a little closer. “Don’t worry, Seunghyun. The baby angel’s got this. If anyone can win, it’s Daesung.” And, for just a moment, it seemed as though Seunghyun had looked up at him.

Seungri chuckled breathlessly. “Look at you, baby angel. You’ve got such fight! I’m almost sad I am going to tear you apart.” When Daesung did not respond, the demon hissed at him and lunged forward once more, his blade snaking out to find flesh.

With a quick twist of his blade, Daesung had wrapped his weapon around Seungri’s in a tight bind. The demon attempted to yank it back only to find it firmly trapped. Daesung met his gaze – his dark eyes seeming to burn with an internal flame – before he snapped his wrist in a quick movement. Seungri’s fingers were suddenly empty as the blade flew through the air in a delicate arch before landing in Daesung’s waiting hand. At first, the darkness seemed to bite into Daesung’s flesh, making him wince at the agony it caused. But then, slowly, the blade seemed to tremble and shudder in his grip. Jiyong’s gaze affixed to the sword as it continued to writhe in Daesung’s hand, and he gasped when he noticed tendrils of silver moving up from the hilt. It looked as though rivulets of moonlight were pouring down the blade, and everywhere they touched the darkness vanished. In a few moments, the entire weapon was a pure silver that reflected the brightness of the angel who held it, and the sword fell still in his grip at last. Daesung let out a slow breath and eased his grip on the hilt.

The demon took a stumbling step backwards. “W-what have you done to my sword?”

Mimicking the slicing motions Seungri had made earlier, Daesung let the sword taste the air as he swung it smoothly about. “It has been purified.” His gaze snapped up to meet Seungri’s eyes. “The time for your destruction has come, Lee Seunghyun. You have lead astray many of the children of the Most High, and for that unforgivable crime you will face the ultimate undoing. The material of your soul will be returned to the fount from whence it came, and you will cease to be. Such is the punishment for squandering the great gift of life you were given; such is the mercy you will be shown.” As Daesung stepped towards the quaking demon lord, the light about him concentrated yet again: this time on his back. Feathers made of pure silver light spilled down Daesung’s back to form into two great wings that trailed lightly along the ground behind him, crackling with the divine energy that raced along each feather’s spine. The angel’s brilliant wings stretched wide as he brought the two swords together, crossing them near the hilt, as he loomed over the fallen shape of Seungri’s body. “Sin no more.” And with that, Daesung brought the swords out to the side – slicing cleaning through the demon’s neck – before plunging both blades into his body. An unearthly shriek pierced the air as the body turned into curling black mist that dissipated as the bright light radiating from Daesung’s body touched it.

Daesung let out a trembling breath and turned to look at Jiyong and Seunghuyn.

“…Daesung?”

The angel’s fingers went limp at the sound of Seunghyun’s voice, and the swords fell to the hardwood with a clatter. “Seunghyun?” Jiyong only just managed to stumble out of the way before Daesung had wrapped Seunghyun tightly in his grip – his wings stretched out behind him. A soft sigh slid past Daesung’s lips as he felt the familiar warmth of Seunghyun’s fingertips lightly exploring the curve of his jaw. “Seunghyun, you’re safe. Thank God.”

“I don’t understand,” Seunghyun stuttered. “W-what is going on?”

“It must be the moment of grace,” Jiyong murmured.

Daesung nodded. It seemed like the only reasonable answer. “When people are going to die, they’re allowed to see the angel that comes for them.” He pulled back enough to look into Seunghyun’s eyes. “I’ve been with you all along, love. Fighting to keep you safe - to save your soul.”

A troubled look crossed Seunghyun’s features. “You saw everything I did?”

The angel sank onto the bed beside Seunghyun and held him close. “I did." His hand curled hand about the brunette's strong jaw. "And I love you even more now than the day I died.”

Surprise colored Seunghyun’s features as his mouth dropped open and his eyes became wide. “Y-you do? But how? After everything I’ve done, you should hate me.”

Leaning close, Daesung smiled. “You took care of Mino, helped Ji-Hyo and Junsu get back together, showed how much you loved me, and even helped with planning the wedding. The other things you did are nothing compared to that, Seunghyun…as long as you promise me two things.”

Seunghyun took a steadying breath, trying to comprehend what he was seeing and experience. “What?” he finally mumbled.

“Promise me you will never give up on yourself, Seunghyun. As long as you believe we can be together again – as long as you believe you can be redeemed – we can be together when you die.” He brushed Seunghyun’s bangs out of his eyes. “Can you promise me you’ll do that?”

“I promise,” Seunghyun murmured. “And…the second one?"

Daesung laughed a little. "Ditch Zico. He's terrible, and you deserve better."

Seunghyun hung his head. "I promise I won't go near him again." He hesitated. "And in return, you’ll wait for me?”

“Whether it’s an hour or a hundred years, I’ll be at your side. I love you, Seunghyun.” And Daesung would never admit it, but tears traced down his cheeks as a perfect smile turned Seunghyun’s lips.

“I love you, Daesung. Always and always and –“

“Forever,” Daesung ended. He then brought their lips together for a soft, perfect caress. Brilliant light flooded the entire room, banishing all of the darkness, as the angel poured his heart into the innocent contact. When he pulled back, he sighed softly. “When the time is right, we’ll be together again. Trust in that. Trust in me. Alright?”

Seunghyun clung tighter to Daesung. “Do you have to go?”

The angel nodded. “I do. Someone else needs me.” He looked over at Jiyong for a brief moment before returning his attention to his beloved. “And your moment of grace is just about up. But… every time you go to sleep, I will be there with you, Seunghyun. And when you eat at the NamCat. And when you go to the wedding. I will always be with you.” He pressed a last kiss to Seunghyun’s forehead before standing – slowly fading from Seunghyun’s mortal sight.

Before Daesung could so much as utter another word, another angel appeared. This angel was different: Where Jiyong and Jaejoong were slim and beautiful, this angel was muscular and seemed to radiate a sort of exuberant energy. He all but beamed at Daesung, who was carefully picking both swords off the floor. “Kang Daesung?” The blond nodded. “Captain Ok Taecyeon, at your service. I have been sent by the High Seraphim, Commander of the Armies of Heaven, Lee Chaerin, to collect you.”

Daesung stared at the stranger. “Ji, who is he talking about.”

“The seraphim, Daesung. The highest order of angels – the ones who guard the boss and make sure that the rest of the heavenly hosts are doing their job,” Jiyong said, shooting a look at the unfamiliar angel.

Daesung nodded slightly. “I see. Well, the seraphim are just going to have to wait.” Taecyeon gaped at the blond even as he sheathed the two swords in the scabbards he had summoned. “Jiyong and I have some unfinished business, and we are running on a very tight schedule.”

“What could you have to do that is more important than answer the summons?” Taecyeon stuttered.

A wide smile tugged the blond’s lips. “If Seunghyun were to commit suicide and go to Hell, he would have died by now. But, there is a second time slot later in the day – one where he dies nobly and goes to Heaven. Between now and then, Jiyong and I need to run a quick errand down in Hell.”

This time, it was Jiyong’s turn to gape at Daesung. “In Hell? What are you talking about, Daesung?”

Going to Jiyong’s side, the younger angel gave his shoulder a squeeze. “We’re going to get Youngbae.”


	16. Come Back

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> To Hell.

As soon as the last traces of angelic grace had faded from the room, Seunghyun let out a shuddering breath and stumbled to his feet. He could not believe what he had seen – Daesung battling a demon! – but nor could he deny it. No matter how impossible the scenario seemed, Seunghyun had been witness to the war between Heaven and Hell. It felt as though his entire world had been turned on its head. Somewhere out there, Daesung was watching over him and doing his best to protect him. Seunghyun had been so certain he would never see Daesung again, and yet he had proof to the contrary. Not only would he see Daesung again, but they could be together for eternity.

And he had nearly ruined it.

Stumbling over to the bedside table, he picked up the bottle of poisonous whiskey and the full glass. He stared down at the instruments of his near death, and he shuddered at the heavy weight of them in his hands. Going to the bathroom, he poured the contents of both the glass and bottle down the tub before washing them away with a strong stream of water. As the water slowly spun down the drain, Seunghyun felt his thoughts clear for the first time in months. The gravity of his choice and what he had nearly done to his family pierced his heart. Cradling his face in his hands, the man sunk to the bathroom floor and curled up into a tight ball – crying for the harm he had nearly caused. In particular, he could not imagine facing Mino. How could he have thought – like a fool – that Taehyun could ever replace a brother. Mino and Taehyun had only been dating for a week, for Heaven’s sake! And if that were not enough, he could imagine how Ji-Hyo would fall apart if he had died. The woman had told him time and again that his nearness helped her not feel completely lost without Daesung, as though Seunghyun helped keep her brother alive with his presence. If Seunghyun had died, both Ji-Hyo and Mino would have lost their siblings and felt their families completely shatter for a second time.

But Daesung had saved him. The quiet, broken shards of Seunghyun’s heart seemed to quiver back into place at the thought of Daesung defending him. His dear Dae still loved him and wanted to spend eternity together, even after everything Seunghyun had done. It was a miracle. Seunghyun felt as though pure gold had sealed the pieces of his heart back together, as though he were a kintsugi masterpiece. He felt more beautiful for having been broken and remade in the light of his angel’s love and devotion. Now he simply had to prove worthy of all of the blessings he had received and live the sort of life that would permit him to be with the beautiful blond for always.

Rising to his feet, Seunghyun moved over to the sink and washed his face. He glanced at himself in the mirror. His eyes seemed haunted, perhaps because he had seen too much, but for the first time since Daesung’s death there was light found there. In fact, his eyes were bright, as though lit from within. A tiny smile tugged his lips. The romantic side of him wanted to say it was Daesung’s love shining in his eyes, but the more pragmatic side noted that it was probably due to the fact he felt a now alien sensation: hope.

Taking a deep breath, he decided to escape the oppressive quiet of his apartment. It would be better, he thought, to go immerse himself in the Christmas spirit and bustling crowds. Seeing the snow and the decorations in the shop windows seemed like a healthy way to spend some time before Mino and Taehyun came over. Maybe he could even convince the pair to watch a certain Christmas movie with him – to keep Daesung's Christmas Eve tradition alive.

Smiling, he grabbed his coat and other affects before heading out the door towards his looming death.

As Seunghyun sought to rejoin the living, the trio of angels had relocated to a nearby park. Taecyeon was in the midst of frowning at Daesung, who was attempting to explain why going to Hell to rescue a demon was more important than reporting to the seraphim. The blond angel finally sighed. “Taecyeon, is it or is it not considered the most selfless, noble thing a person can do if they lay down their life for another person?”

The muscular brunette nodded. “It is. In fact, it is one of the high laws. If a man loses his life for a friend, he gains it in the life to come.” He glanced over at Jiyong. “It’s considered one of the seven great saving graces.”

“Exactly,” Daesung said firmly. “And the only great sin, according to those same laws, is that of despair, right? Only if a person no longer believes themselves capable of redemption are they lost to the heavens, right?”

Taecyeon nodded – albeit it slowly. He was desperately trying to figure out what the mewling demon had to do with the great laws. “Yes,” he hazarded.

“Youngbae gave his life to save Seunghyun’s soul,” Daesung said, widening his eyes in an attempt to emphasize how important the concept was. “He literally laid down his own soul – taking up an eternity of suffering – to save another. If that doesn’t mean he falls under the high laws, I don’t know what would!”

Understanding lit up Taecyeon’s face, making it shine like the noonday sun. “He helped save Seunghyun?” He stood a little straighter. “Then, you’re right. He must be redeemable. Which means…you need back up.” He nodded firmly. “There is no way I can let you two go down there alone. Even though you would be protected by your innate grace, a rescue mission of this caliber needs back up.”

Jiyong, who looked rather like a stunned fish because of the way his mouth kept opening and closing, stuttered, “You mean you’ll help us?”

The brunette clapped a large hand on Jiyong’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze. “Of course, Jiyong. We protect our own.” Taecyeon turned over his arm to reveal a silver sun imprinted onto the skin of his forearm. He tapped it with a strong finger, causing the mark to glow. “The Second Hour Legion should be gathered together shortly. We’ll meet them at our headquarters and leave for Hell directly from there.”

Daesung beamed up at Taecyeon. “Thank you for your help. But…why do we have to go to headquarters? Can’t we go right to Hell?”

Taecyeon shook his head. “The best way to get to Hell is to follow the spiraling path that leads to the blackened bone gates of Purgatory. And if we stop by headquarters, I can make certain you are both appropriately outfitted for the journey.” He took both of their hands in his. “Can’t have you disappearing on me now!” And with that, the angels vanished.

Awareness of the world around Youngbae crept in like a winter wind through the cracks of a window. First came the shuddering sensation that something – everything – hurt. It felt as though his arms were being torn from his chest, like they were being slowly ripped molecule by molecule from one another. A gasp shuddered through his lungs, making the pain intensify, as he attempted to move his fingers. The fresh wave of agony stuttered through his body, and he slowly turned his head to one side. Opening his eyes to examine the situation was a mistake. His throat clenched shut and a sweat broke out across the surface of his tan skin, mingling with the rivulets of blood along his arms. It was his worst nightmare come to life: thick, rusted barbed wire had been wrapped around his arms and chest – suspending him between two great poles. Were he still alive, the air would slowly be pressed from his lungs as he slowly asphyxiated – suffocated by the weight of his own body – but the immortality found in death meant he was only left with the echoing suffering, the feeling that he should be dying. Endlessly dying.

His muscles screamed in anguish at the continued draw of his weight, and it made him wonder how far the drop was before he met the ground. There was a small corner of his mind that thought trying to rip out an arm would be worth it, if it meant he could fall to the ground and stop hurting. One glance downwards, though, assured him that falling would not be an escape from his anguish. Scant breaths from his bare toes was a wide lake of bubbling lava, just waiting to melt away his flesh until only charred bone remained. If he fell into that pit, he would be as surely destroyed as Seungri had been. Panic made his muscles clench, and the barbed wires dug more firmly into his ragged flesh.

_At least,_ Youngbae thought,  _Jiyong won’t see me like this._

Before Daesung knew quite what was happening, he found himself standing in the heavenly armory. Taecyeon and his assistant, a rather bubbly angel named Eunhyuk, were in the process of helping Jiyong find his armor – leaving Daesung to stare at the rows and rows of glittering equipment. “Just find the one that calls out to you,” Taecyeon was repeating. “There’s a suit in here for every angel!” Daesung’s lips twitched at the extremely annoyed look his trainer gave the brunette; Jiyong hated being ordered about.

As the blond waited, fidgeting nervously, he began to notice the faint feeling of being tugged down the aisle. It felt as though a string had been wound around his rib and someone on the other end was giving it a pull. He glanced over his shoulder, frowning slightly, as he considered whether or not to follow it. One of the other angels – a rather boyish young woman – laughed at the expression on his face. “Feeling it, huh? You should follow it! It’s probably your suit calling for you.”

Daesung licked his bottom lip. “I should wait for Taecyeon,” he protested shyly. Going off on his own sounded like a terrible idea; in a place this size he’d easily be lost – even with his giant wings.

The other angel laughed. “Come on. I’ll go with you. Taec won’t mind; it’ll save us time!” She bounded over and looked down the aisle in the direction he had been staring. “That way?” He gave a hesitant nod. “Sweet! I love that section. Come on!” This time, she grabbed his hand and began to drag him down the aisle. They made it some distance before the tugging sensation suddenly changed. Daesung stopped short, reorienting himself, and turned to the left. His hand slipped out of the angel’s grip as he began to move faster through the aisles, barely hesitating before turning as he seemed to be drawn further and further into the glittering maze. And then, all at once, the feeling stopped. Drawing to a halt, Daesung looked up to find himself face to face with one of the least ornate suits of armor he had seen since stepping foot in the armory. He let out a slow breath as he considered the supple white leather of the jerkin, which rested lightly over a mail shirt made of glittering silver. As he looked closer, he noticed that the only real decoration on the armor was a touch of silver embroidery at the neckline of the jerkin – giving the impression of feathers. It was perfect in its simplicity.

“You found it,” the female angel said with a grin. “Well go on, touch it!”

He glanced over his shoulder at her. “Are you sure?”

“With the way you ran, that has to be it. Each piece of armor is made for one specific angel, and when they come to find it the armor calls to them.” She shrugged. “It’s so we never have to worry about fit issues, I guess. If you touch it, it’ll put itself on.”

The idea of the armor putting itself on him was unnerving; armor was supposed to be insentient and sedentary. But, what did he have to lose? If it was made for him, it’d work out. If he was wrong, then it wouldn’t move. Right? Giving a mental shrug, Daesung reached out to place his hand on the leather. He was surprised by the strange sensation of what felt like water rushing over his skin – coating it in a slightly cool embrace. When he looked down, he was stunned to find that he was wearing the armor, which was far lighter than he had expected. It almost felt as though he were bare. Somehow he was even wearing grey breeches, a linen shirt, and tall white leather boots to round out the outfit. His swords had even been transferred to new sheaths and hung from twin belts around his hips.

“Man, you look killer!” Daesung turned to give the female angel a crooked smile. “Even got stuff for your wings! That’s so boss.”

Blinking, he looked up and noticed silver plates placed strategically along the feathered bridge of each wing. The placement of each plate seemed to be intended to keep the wings from being broken or ripped from his back; the thought of either happening made him shudder. “Yeah, I guess so.” He gave his wings an experimental stretch – noticing that they were rather, well, large. “Are they always going to be like this?”

“What? Huge?” The angel laughed and folded her arms across her chest. “Nah. You can make them disappear if you need to. But going into Hell, they know they need to be out. Very few demons can fly, so being able to stay in the air is one of the best ways to make sure they don’t dropkick you into a pit of lava.”

He blinked. “Is that likely to happen? Being dropkicked, I mean.”

She shook her head as a wide grin turned her lips. “Nah. You’ll have too many people looking out for you. That’s why so many of us are going – to keep you safe.” So many was certainly one way to put it: The Second Hour Legion was three thousand angels strong! “Eunhyuk and I will probably be assigned to you and Jiyong while Taec makes sure our exit stays clear. Eunhyuk will be able to carry Ji while you and I do the actual snagging.”

“Doesn’t Jiyong have wings?” Daesung tucked his wings back into his sides and turned to more fully face the woman.

She shook her head. “Nah. He’s not the right rank to have wings. Different angels have different abilities. I mean, he was able to make the human see you. That’s the gift of grace! It means his abilities must have finally manifested when he redeemed Youngbae.”

“What? I thought – couldn’t Seunghyun see me because he was dying?”

The woman chuckled. “He could see you because Jiyong imparted his grace to him. Seunghyun hadn’t drunk the whiskey, so he wasn’t dying. It must mean Jiyong is an angel of inspiration. They’re a pretty special class. Normally they keep artists on track or help people find reasons to keep living. They can give someone inspiration or even let them see angels, if they need to. We don’t get many of those!”

“Oh.” Daesung smiled a little. “That’s actually pretty awesome. What – what kind of angel am I?” His wings ruffled as his nerves got the better of him.

But, the woman just grinned. “You’ll see. I’m sure the council will tell you all about it, after our little trip.”

“Amber!” The distinct sound of Taecyeon’s bellow cut through any questions Daesung might have asked her.

“What?” she barked back, turning towards where the other angel was striding  – dressed in armor that looked like it had escaped from  _Gladiator_.

“Oh, you got Daesung into his armor. Good.” Taecyeon paused, testing the fit of Daesung’s jerkin. “Awesome. Right, you ready to lead the charge?” He grinned so broadly at Daesung that the younger angel couldn’t help but feel a little overwhelmed. It seemed Taecyeon not only wanted him to lead the mission but also believed him to be entirely capable of doing so. Daesung gulped.

“Uh, are you sure that’s a good idea? I’ve never even been there..” He ran a hand through his soft blond hair. “I’d just get us lost. You should probably take the lead, Taecyeon.”

The brunette made something of a face. “Alight. How about we lead together? That way we still know where to go, but you still get the credit you deserve. I mean, it was your idea!” Taecyeon gave Daesung’s shoulder a quick squeeze. “Come on, you two. Let’s go get this show on the road. Everyone’s ready.”

When they arrived at where the rows of angels waited, Daesung felt his breath catch. They were nothing short of radiant in their glimmering armor – with their wings all tucked close to their bodies. He noticed that each angel had unique wings, with different colors and sizes. Some angels even appeared to have leathery bat wings, which surprised him. He had thought that only devils had those kinds of wings; but, then again, Amber had said most demons couldn’t fly. And he supposed the wings did not determine the character of their possessor. He looked over at Jiyong, who it seemed had managed to find the glitteriest set of armor possible. It seemed to shimmer from within, like it had been made from golden diamonds and polished rubies. The set even had a rather lovely belt around the waist that seemed to be dripping with jewels. Shaking his head, the blond laughed a little. He had a flair for swag, it seemed.

Jiyong was in the midst of trying to convince Eunhyuk that he really did not want to be carried when Daesung came to a stop at his side. “Daesung, tell him I refuse to be carried.” Jiyong turned to his trainee with a rather sharp frown on his lips. “It’s ridiculous.”

Daesung chuckled a little. “Ji. You have to be carried. You can’t fly.”

Jiyong’s mouth dropped open at the perceived betrayal. “What?” He folded his arms over his chest. “No. I won’t be carried like a child.”

Sighing, Daesung shook his head. “Ji, you need to be carried in order to keep up. But I am sure that being there to see Youngbae and help him will be worth being carried. I’m also sure Eunhyuk won’t treat you like a kid. You’re just…very important. Too important to be left behind, too important to walk.”

Something about Daesung’s words seemed to placate Jiyong at least a little. He at least did not look as though he was moments from punching Eunhyuk for stepping closer to him. “Be respectful,” Ji growled, “or I’ll break off all of your limbs, starting with the shortest.”

Eunhyuk smothered a smile. “Yes, sir.” He gave a playful salute. “I think it’d be best if you rode on my back. It might be a bit hard to hold on because of my wings, but it also means my sword hand will be free.”

Jiyong rolled his eyes. “Whatever. Let’s just get this over with. Youngbae needs us.”

“That’s the spirit!” Taecyeon grinned. Jiyong shot the beaming angel a glare before letting Eunhyun help him onto his back. Once he was situated, Taecyeon nodded. “Right. Let’s go! Remember, everyone, our mission is the extraction of Dong Youngbae. We’ll keep the hoards of Hell busy while Eunhyuk, Amber, Daesung, and Jiyong do the actual snagging. If you notice they need help, feel free to step in. Got it?” He was met with a resounding cheer. “Alright! Let’s fly!”

Seunghyun had been wandering the streets for at least two hours. The morning sun had slowly dissolved the dawn mist as it rose in the sky, and with each passing hour the streets became more crowded. He could hear the pleasant cacophony of families rushing about – mothers calling for their children, a son asking for a particular present, a father trying to convince his wife to buy something less expensive – and smiled slightly to himself. Even the distant sound of Christmas music, sick as he was of it, seemed pleasant. It was amazing what knowing Daesung still existed did for his mood. The stoic brunette had even broke out into a spontaneous dance number while standing in a book store. A little girl in the aisle had gaped at him, which had only made him dance with even more abandon. By the time her mother came to collect her, the little girl had been giggling madly at her weird “Choom Oppa.” For a brief moment, it made Seunghyun wonder what having a daughter of his own would be like – if she would find him funny or annoying.

Daesung had always spoken of wanting a family, perhaps because his relationship with his parents had been so bad. He thought he could at least do better than them, even if he had to raise a child by himself. Of course, in their country the stigma against single parents was so strong that single parent adoptions were simply not allowed. But, Daesung had imagined moving to some other country – maybe China or even America – to adopt. Seunghyun’s heart ached a little at the thought of Daesung’s unfulfilled dream; the man had so much love he could have given a child.  _Maybe I will adopt one,_ Seunghyun thought suddenly.  _Daesung did say there were so many parentless children in the world that one parent was better than no parents at all. I may not be Daesung, but I don’t think I’d be too bad._ He smiled to himself. It was something to consider, if nothing else. The nice thing about antiques were they were anywhere in the world. He could easily relocate his business, and the thought of moving to someplace like England did have an appeal to it. The art and furniture there were absolutely amazing – some of his favorites. Or perhaps France. Or Italy! Ji-Hyo and Mino would be certain to visit if he were to live in an art mecca such as those countries.

He was lost in thoughts of happy days spent walking the Italian beaches or exploring the museums of France when he came to a familiar street corner. Seunghyun felt a chill race down his spine, which had nothing to do with the gentle snowfall. It was  _the_ crosswalk. The one where Daesung…

Seunghyun drew in a shuddering breath and looked out across the street. It had been so long. So many months of suffering. So many months of not understanding why his Daesung had to be taken. But, perhaps now he understood a little better. From the other side, Daesung had been able to fight for Seunghyun’s soul. That was something, wasn’t it? Though, a stubborn corner of Seunghyun’s mind pointed out, he would not have gotten so lost in the first place if Daesung were still alive. But, he had learned that the past was passed; he could do nothing to bring his lover back to life.

Sighing, he reached over to push the signal button for the crosswalk. There was a good café on the other side of the street where he and Daesung often went to lunch; eating there sounded like a good plan. It was then that his gaze caught on a familiar form across the way. He squinted against the sun, trying to be certain of the identity of the man across the way. His lips twitched. Nam Taehyun, with his earphones in, stood bobbing his head along to whatever music had caught his fancy. Seunghyun would have to bump into him, as they crossed paths, if only to say a quick hello. He imagined the brunette was on his way to Mino’s apartment, which was not too far away. The two had intended to have lunch together before coming to collect Seunghyun, as he understood it. They were a little ridiculous in how many dates they were managing to fit in their first week of dating, but the brunette couldn’t help but find it adorable. His brother was obviously head-over-heels for the sassy baker. 

The signal changed over – letting the pedestrians know it was their turn to cross. Seunghyun smirked and ducked his head a little, preparing to bump Taehyun when their paths met. He was perhaps a third of the way across the street when he heard the sudden sound of tires squealing, protesting the slamming of brakes, but not managing to catch on the slick road. Lifting his head, Seunghyun saw it: The car swerving out of control and heading directly for the crosswalk. An inexperienced driver had been driving too fast, and right in the path of the car was… Seunghyun’s eyes went wide.

“TAEHYUN!”

But the baker could not hear him over the music blaring in his ears. Seunghyun hesitated only half a breath before darting forward, slamming into Taehyun – knocking him out of the path of the car.

Hell was not what Daesung had expected. He had imagined lots of fire and screaming, but they were instead met with a barren wasteland. The blackened bone gates stood ajar, as though they loomed simply for mood rather than any actual purpose. And the pathway into the dusty darkness was empty. Taecyeon seemed to expect it, though, and continued to fly forward with an easy grace. Daesung was having a bit of trouble keeping up – flying took practice he did not have – but the other angels kept giving him pointers on how to do better. When the angels all suddenly soared upwards, their wings spread wide, Daesung looked over to Amber in confusion; none of them were flapping their wings in order to rise. “Heat current,” she called. “We’re riding the hot air up. Means we’re close to the lake of fire.”

And that was when Hell began to live up to Daesung’s expectations.

Before them, stretching as far as the eye could see in three directions, was bubbling lava that hissed and sputtered its ire. Throughout the lava there were smatterings of islands with people trapped on them, wailing in their agony as the heat continuously seared their flesh. In other places rose small mountains, some of which had people chained to the surface while others were in an endless struggle to reach the top in order to escape the heat. The air was all but alive with endless screaming, cursing, and moaning - like a symphony of the damned. But there seemed to be no sign of Youngbae.

The blood curdling sound of a trumpet blaring out a brazen call drew Daesung’s thoughts to a sudden stop. He looked about nearly frantically in an attempt to find the source of the sound. In the distance, he saw an island that seemed to be approaching them quickly and was swarmed with bare, thin trees. “Demons down left,” Taecyeon suddenly called. “Chansung, take ‘em down.”

“Yes, sir!” Another brunette angel and his unit swept down to engage with the island. On closer inspection, Daesung felt his chest constrict. It was not an island, but instead a barge with multiple levels of demons and a vast array of anti-air weaponry on each bridge. Each of the supposed trees were deadly looking pikes and hooks – weapons meant to catch and drag down angelic opponents down to the waiting throngs of enemies. He looked over at Taecyeon and called, “Will they be alright?”

Taecyeon nodded. “They’re the best of the best, Daesung. They’ll be just fine!” He began to flap his wings once more and moved towards something in the distance. “Come on. I think I see him.”

Jiyong lifted his head from where it had been tucked against Eunhyuk’s back, and he stared hard at the small shape on the horizon. Each wingbeat brought the angelic host closer to their target, and two more units were dispatched to deal with approaching barges. Then, as Youngbae’s figure at last came fully into view, Jiyong swore with particular creativity. Amber looked over at Jiyong with upraised eyebrows; she clearly had never heard an angel swear – let alone so emphatically. 

And Daesung could not blame Jiyong for the words pouring from his mouth. Youngbae was covered in blood that ran so freely down his body that it dripped from his toes and sizzled before even hitting the lava. (Who knew they still had blood, Daesung thought in surprise.) The man’s feet were also heavily burned; were he mortal, they would have to be amputated for him to have any hope of survival. His torso and arms were no better. The wire had done its work destroying the man’s flesh and muscle; it was a wonder that Youngbae was still conscious. But, then again, that was Hell’s specialty: suffering without respite. Taecyeon took one look at the situation and winced. “Daesung, we’re going to need someone to hold Youngbae while two others cut him down. If he falls into that lava, it’s game over. His soul will be destroyed.”

Daesung licked his bottom lip before nodding. “Okay. I’ll go grab him.”

Taecyeon’s brow lifted. “You sure? It’ll be a strain on you, since you’re not used to flying.”

“Yeah, but he knows who I am. He might resist one of you, thinking it’s a demon’s trick or something.” Daesung dived a little lower. “Besides, I’ve got big wings. What’re they for if not supporting a lot of weight?” He flashed Taecyeon a somewhat nervous smile. “Just don’t take long!” And with that he was speeding down towards Youngbae.

As Eunhyuk and Amber sped off to cut the wires. Taecyeon and his unit spread out to keep back any of the barges that got too close to the operation. Daesung drew to a rather sloppy halt in front of Youngbae, causing the man to roll his head back in surprise. The blond angel gave the former demon a crooked smile. “Hey, Youngbae. Ji wants you home in time for dinner.” He carefully flew a little closer. At this range, the heat was nearly overwhelming in its intensity, but Daesung tried to ignore it.

“W-what are you doing?” Youngbae squinted at the angel – confused to see him dressed so splendidly and born by giant silver wings. Last he had seen the man, Daesung had been wingless and engaged in battle with Seungri.

“I’m here to take you to Heaven,” Daesung said firmly. “But I’m going to need you to cooperate. Amber and Eunhyuk are going to cut you free. They’re going to start with one side, further up. When your arm is free, I’ll need you to put it around my waist. Once the other one is free, put it around too.” He cleared his throat. “Then I’ll fly up, and they’ll trim the wire down to closer to your arm. Do you understand?”

Youngbae managed a little laugh. “Sure… I’ve been redeemed. I’ll do whatever you want, Seungri.” He rolled his eyes before letting his head fall forward. Daesung frowned. Clearly, the man did not believe he was being rescued, even with Daesung appearing before him. Well, he would just have to believe it when they got to their final destination. Moving in close, Daesung carefully wrapped his arms around Youngbae. He then nodded to Eunhyuk, who sliced through the first bonds with his sword. When his arm fell free, Youngbae gasped in pain as he lurched downwards - toes skimming the lava. But, he managed to wrap his arm around Daesung’s waist. The blond tightened his grip on Youngbae, keeping him level, even as his wings beat to help them stay aloft. In that moment he was grateful for his armor; the barbed wire would be doing a number on his torso if not for the protection of the blessed metal. As soon as Youngbae’s second arm was free, Daesung rocketed upwards.

High above the lake of fire, Amber, Eunhyuk, and Jiyong met up with the pair. Eunhyuk’s face fell into an expression of pure horror at the sight of the damage that had been wrought on Youngbae’s flesh. “Oh my…”

“Hurry and cut the wires as close as you can,” Daesung ordered, his voice firm. “We need to get him out of here. I – I need to get to Seunghyun.” The angels worked quickly, and soon the barbed wire was little more than tiny tails hanging free – except for the wires still wrapped tightly around the man’s body. Youngbae frowned when his gaze caught onto Jiyong’s, and he twitched a little in Daesung’s grip. “Hold on, Youngbae. Ji can hold onto you as much as he wants once we’re out of here. Let’s go.” Swinging Youngbae up into his arms, Daesung whirled and started back across the lake as though the Devil himself were on their trail. Which, come to think of it, was a very real possibility. There had been a gathering darkness on the horizon that had made a tremor of unadulterated fear rocket through Daesung’s body, and he honestly did not want to find out what it was that inspired such primal reactions.

Even as the legion closed back in around them, Daesung could not shake the growing feeling of dread burning through his chest. Something was wrong - very wrong - with Seunghyun. The moment they rocketed through the gates of Hell, Daesung drew to a halt and turned to Taecyeon. "I need you to take Youngbae," he called. “I need to go.”

Jiyong watched with baited breath as his beloved was carefully passed from one angel to another. “D-do you need me to go with you, Daesung?”

The baby angel smiled at his mentor. “Go with Youngbae. He needs you.” Daesung glanced down at his bloodied armor with an upraised eyebrow. It was perhaps not the best appearance for an angelic visitation, but it would have to do. “Take care of them, Taec. Or else.” With that, the blond whirled away and rushed towards his Seunghyun. He only hoped he was not too late.


	17. In Heaven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please don't go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Lilspydermunkey - the flames to my Demon Lord Seungri, the wings to my Dae, the kick to my pants. Without LSM's encouragement (and threats), this chapter would have taken at least another week to finish. So, thank you. <3

“Seunghyun?”

The man felt as though he were floating – drifting through the nothingness of feeling utterly undone. He could sense, at the periphery of his consciousness, the distant sound his name being shouted by voices he did not recognize. Only the repeated, nearly frantic, cadence of Taehyun’s voice calling his name seemed at all familiar. It was worrisome, Seunghyun thought, how distressed the baker sounded. He seemed to be mere breaths from a complete meltdown, though Seunghyun had no idea why he would feel that way. Christmas Eve was a time of peace and happiness; they were going to have a wonderful night celebrating with his brother.

His chest stung slightly, making him wince. He wanted to lift a hand to rub away the strange sensation, but his fingers seemed utterly unwilling to move.

“Come on, Seunghyun! You’ve got to breathe!”

How odd. The voices all sounded so concerned. He wondered if the mumbled sound of their voices was a result of their upset or if he had somehow managed to get water in his ear. But, he had been walking down the street to get lunch. Why would he have water in his ear? So, the fault had to lie with them. Yes, it was their fault for mumbling. He could not reply if they did speak clearly enough for him to hear.

“He’s losing a lot of blood. It’ll be a miracle if he makes it to the hospital.”

“No! He can’t die!”

“Sir, you need to sit still. You are injured as well, and we can’t risk you making it worse. The only reason you are here at all is because you promised to be still.”

Seunghyun sighed as he caught the sound of someone crying. He hated crying; it was so exhausting. Some part of his mind, a distant corner smothered by the same heavy weight that pinned his fingers, whispered of many months spent awash in tears. That was a ridiculous thought, though. Seunghyun had only cried – really cried – twice in his life. And the idea of spending months crying was utterly ridiculous. He did not have that weak of a spirit. There was no tragedy so grave that he would respond like an absolute child and waste away in his salted sorrows. But, something about that sounded wrong. His mind conjured up the distant, shadowed memory of slim black stone with a name etched on its surface… Daesung.

He gasped as his body suddenly seemed to drown in pain. Every limb felt as though it were on fire, and his mind was bombarded with the memories that had been so firmly packed away. The phone call. Identifying the body. Drinking. So much drinking. Zico. Meaningless, empty sex. The art gallery. Poisoned whiskey. ….Daesung.

Just as he felt like he were about to choke on the excruciating agony rippling through his body, a familiar warmth filled the ambulance and soothed away the clamor of the pain until only quiet awareness remained. Seunghyun managed to tip his head slightly towards the source of the warmth, and he wondered when it had gotten so bright. It felt like… like a small sun hung above his head. Narrowing his eyes, he blinked up at it and tried to make out the shape of it. He could see the hint of something in the brightness: a strong jaw, full lips, a hooked nose, crescent-shaped eyes. He let out a ragged, rattling breath. Daesung. He wanted to stretch his hand up to cup around that perfect cheek and stroke the soft, warm skin he had caressed just that morning. But, his fingers still refused to move. Seunghyun was so, so close, and he let out a frustrated gurgle to be denied the contact he wanted.

“Seunghyun.” Daesung’s warm voice washed over his ears – the sound drawing a smile onto his lips. “You were so brave back there, my love. Pushing him out of the way like that.” The angel gave his head a fond shake. “You remind me of Jiyong. So brave, so reckless.”

Seunghyun’s brows twitched. “Jiyong?” His voice sounded strange in his ears, as though it were not coming from his body but from somewhere else. He did not even think his mouth actually moved, come to think of it.

Daesung hummed a little. “The angel I trained with. You saw him. He’s sorry he couldn’t be here – he’s helping Youngbae. But I will introduce you to them both in time.”

Other angels. Right. That made sense. Jiyong and Youngbae were angels that Daesung worked with. Seunghyun managed to jerk his chin down in a nod. “Daesung?”

“Yes love?”

Seunghyun’s fingers twitched towards the beautiful blond. He wanted so badly to hold him. “I want to touch you. Can you kiss me?”

A soft sigh slid past Daesung’s lips. “Oh, Seunghyun, I love you. What would I do without you?” His expressive umber eyes reflected regret, as though he were being denied a present a few more days. “Soon, I promise…soon.” He leaned closer, and his warmth rippled pleasantly across Seunghyun’s skin. “But first, I need you to promise me something.”

~~~

Youngbae was pulled from the depths of sleep by the distinct sound of Jiyong’s singing. It had been rare for the man to actually indulge in singing – he claimed he did not enjoy it – but that distinctly nasal tone was perfect in Youngbae’s opinion. He sighed happily and snuggled down into the unfamiliar weight of what had to be the most amazing pillow to have ever been made. The gentle brush of warm fingertips across the surface of his brow encouraged Youngbae to slowly open his eyes, and oh was it worth the effort. Jiyong, whose hair was a rather beautiful shade of ruby red, was leaning over him. “Ji…” The man wondered if he had managed to pass out from the pain of being slowly roasted in Hell. It made sense that he would dream of Jiyong with the hair color he had loved best on the man when they had both been alive. There was something about the fiery color that suited his sassy, saucy lover oh-so-well.

“Bae, you have such a stupid look on your face,” Jiyong said, his lips twisting up into a feline smile. “It’s the most beautiful thing I think I’ve ever seen.”

Youngbae’s brow furrowed. In his dreams, Jiyong was never a tease – he was ridiculously romantic and uncharacteristically soft. It was what made dream Jiyong such an odd, exciting creature. This Jiyong was snarky and a bit rude, just like… “Are you really here?” The man began to struggle to sit up, and Jiyong carefully helped him upright.

“Better yet,” Jiyong breathed, “you’re really here.” Sitting on the edge of the strangely bright bed, the angel scooted closer to the speechless man. He seemed to drink in the familiar planes of Youngbae’s face with his intense gaze, and his lover’s skin began to burn under the intense scrutiny. Then, as though they were both caught in a music video, time itself seemed to slow as Jiyong leaned in close – his gaze flickering down only once to the soft, full line of his beloved’s bottom lip. His smile turned into a wicked little smirk even as he leaned closer, their eyes locked on one another. As their lips at last met in a soft ghost of a kiss, Jiyong’s gaze stayed tangled with Youngbae’s, as though he were afraid that the man would disappear if he let himself melt into the kiss. But then, then Youngbae dug his fingers into the mess of red hair at the nape of Jiyong’s neck – bringing their lips together for a jubilant kiss that was a clash of tongues and teeth and lips that was certain to bruise. It was the perfect kiss because it was  _real_. He was kissing his Jiyong.

A choked laugh managed to skitter past Youngbae’s lips as he pulled back to admire the flush that had brushed itself across the redhead’s cheekbones. “And where is here?”

Jiyong reached up with a fine, spindly finger to brush away first Youngbae’s tears and then his own. “Where you belong,” he said, his voice alive with warmth. “In Heaven.”

~~~

Mino charged recklessly into the hospital – his eyes scanning frantically for any sign of a familiar figure. The call saying his brother had been hit by a car had made it feel as though the entire world had been turned upside down, raw and unfathomable. And then he had gotten the text from Taehyun that had simply said: “At the hospital with Seunghyun. We need you.” He had left his apartment so quickly that he had been forced to go back for his coat and left shoe; Seunghyun would have ended him if he had shown up at the hospital without those. And then he had even sprung for a cab, because public transportation was simply not fast enough. Nothing was fast enough. If he could, he would appear at Seunghyun’s side in a heartbeat. That was why the sound of someone calling out his name down the hallway drew Mino’s attention like lightning to a metal rod.

Taehyun, his arm in a cast, was leaning against a wall nearby, as though he had been waiting for the tall artist. Mino felt his breath hook itself into the fibers of his lungs like the claws of some monstrous beast unwilling to be pushed back out into the too clean air. The look on Taehyun’s face was one the brunette recognized: He had seen it when the doctors told the young Choi brothers that their parents had passed; he had seen it at Daesung’s funeral; he had seen it during Seunghyun’s confession about his misdeeds. It was the expression of absolute devastation. His hand rose to cover his heart, as though he could protect the tender organ from being ripped out by whatever news his boyfriend had to deliver.

Slowly, sluggishly, Mino approached Taehyun. (Perhaps if he walked slower, the news would somehow change for the better.) But, the closer he came, the more apparent each syllable of sorrow became in Taehyun’s posture and the tear tracks down his smooth cheeks. Even the cast on the man’s arm seemed to bespeak of a grief – a hurt that could not be uttered through mere words. “Mino,” the baker croaked. He slid off the wall and into the waiting circle of his lover’s arms. “Oh, Mino, it was so awful.”

Carefully, the artist wrapped his hand around the back of Taehyun’s head as he cradled the crying man close. He drew in a ragged breath, trying to find the words he suddenly lacked, and winced as his mind fell utterly blank. Mino was spared from asking what had happened, though, by the soft sound of Taehyun’s voice: “I was walking to your apartment. You know that corner near the café where we had our first date? I was crossing, and…” Taehyun trembled in his arms. “I wasn’t paying attention. I was so busy listening to that mix you made and thinking about how excited I was for this afternoon. I didn’t see it coming. I didn’t see the car.”

Mino leaned back – peeling himself off of Taehyun. He gazed down at the brunette; his eyes were utterly empty and his expression was as unreadable as a freshly made sheet of paper. “Seunghyun?”

Taehyun pinched his eyes shut and cradled his broken arm against his thin chest. “He saw it – saw me. He pushed me out of the way, Mino, and he – he – he –“

With a shudder, Mino let his head drop to rest on Taehyun’s shoulder. Tears, the traitorous sigils of grief, pricked at the backs of his eyes. “Did he – is he?”

The soft weight of Taehyun’s fingers in his hair offered some small measure of peace. “I don’t know. He’s in surgery.”

It was a mercy, in its way, that Mino’s face was hidden in the other man’s shoulder. His face broke out into a strange shuffle between a smile and an expression of horror. The fact Seunghyun had not yet died was better than he had expected, but it was clear that the odds were not in his brother’s favor. It was evident by the way the baker was shaking that he was certain it was his fault Mino’s brother was dancing along the line between life and death. “Let’s go sit down,” Mino breathed. “If he’s in surgery… it could be a while.” If Seunghyun did not simply die on the operation table, it could be a long time until his brother was released from the confines of the surgical theatre.

Minutes melted into hours as the pair kept vigil in the hospital waiting room. Within the hour, Ji-Hyo, Junsu, Seungyoon, and Seunghyun's employee Han Bin were all gathered around - some sitting, others pacing. Junsu looked grave - his features set into a stoic expression of seeming indifference - as he cradled an openly sobbing Ji-Hyo in his arms. The poor woman had lost so much in the year that Seunghyun's accident had shattered the walls that normally repressed her emotions in such situations. Seunghoon sat at Taehyun's side; he had come rushing to the hospital when he had heard that the baker had been involved in an accident. They had been best friends since practically the dawn of time, and he had been so relieved to know that the worst of the damage was the man's broken arm and a bruised rib. But the look of agony on Taehyun's face had made the man stop short in his celebrations. He had only known Seunghyun in passing, but the brunette grew grave as he heard the circumstances of the accident. Without a word, he had sat beside Taehyun - determined to support his friend through the duration of the wait. Han Bin, a rather young kid, had been sent over by the other employees at Seunghyun's antique shop in order to send them updates about their boss' condition. The poor boy looked absolutely devastated; Seunghyun was his idol. 

Unable to take the silence, Mino surged out of his seat and began to pace back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. With every circuit, his gaze would drift down the hall towards the operation room where his brother fought tooth and nail to survive. Every minute that passed brought Seunghun either closer to death or survival; Mino prayed it was the latter. But, oh, he desperately wished the outcome - for good or bad - would at last be revealed. He did not know if he could survive another hour - another minute - of not knowing whether his brother would live to see Christmas morning. Clutching his head in his hands, Mino finally leaned against the wall and slid down it, tucking his head in against the tops of his knees. A sob shuddered through his body. "God," he began to pray - silently, "please ... please don't take Seunghyun from me. I know I'm not really someone that should talk to you. I've not done a lot of good in my life. But please... I can change. I can be better. I'll do anything - be anything - you need. Just please don't take my brother. Please."

The operation light went off, and a few minutes later the doctor stepped into the room. "Is someone here for Choi Seunghyun?"

Mino slowly pushed up from the floor and shuffled towards the doctor. "I am," he mumbled. His gaze lifted to meet the serious gaze of the doctor, and he could not help but notice the deep circles that ringed the man's intense hazel gaze. He looked as exhausted as Mino felt. The man felt his heart drop.

  
~~~

"Kang Daesung?"

The angel turned his attention away from scene playing out in the hospital waiting room in order to gaze at the woman behind him. "Yes?"

"The council will see you now. If you'll follow me?" He inclined his head and moved to follow her into the room.   
The council room was a glorious place that seemed to be made entirely of gold and marble; it was the iconic Heaven most mortals seemed to picture. Everything was grandiose with an attention to detail that extended to the way even the swirls of the marble seemed to form wings in the stone. And the golden details along the short wall that surrounded the platform he was lead to shone with a brilliance that exceeded anything Daesung had ever seen before - like Jiyong's armor it glittered with an internal light. It was extraordinary. Tipping his head back, Daesung took in the rising ranks of stadium styled seats - each of which had been claimed by an angel - before looking at last at the single seat set apart from the others. The woman resting there was fierce in her beauty, with the sort of eyes that seemed to strip you down to the bones of your very soul in a single glance. She spun a strand of honey hair about a long finger as she examined the young angel before her; a bit of a smile teased at the edge of her lips as he shifted nervously in place. "Kang Daesung," she drawled in her low, almost nasally, voice. "Did you willingly ignore an order from the Seraphim in order to make an unauthorized journey to Hell?"

Some corner of Daesung's mind noted that his palms were still able to sweat, even though he was an angel. That was a new piece of information he would have been happier not knowing. He licked his bottom lip before standing a bit taller, squaring his shoulders. "Yes, ma'am. I did." 

Crossing her legs, Chaerin leaned her elbow on her knee and cradled her chin in the palm of her hand. "You know, that is technically breaking the laws of Heaven," she murmured. "A summons from the Seraphim is a very serious matter. We do not issue them lightly."

Daesung was almost certain the angels in the first few rows could hear the way his knees had begun to knock together. One angel in particular, a brunette with rather large eyes seated in the front row, leaned forward with a concerned frown. Daesung sighed: He was so screwed. He could only imagine the amount of grief Seunghyun and Jiyong would give him if he managed to be kicked out of Heaven. All of that hard work - everything he had done in order to ensure an eternity with the love of his life - would have been for nothing. "I understand." He cleared his throat, trying to infuse his voice with greater strength. "But I stand by my decision. Rescuing Youngbae was of the utmost import, and time was of the essence in his rescue."

One of the head Seraphim's fine eyebrows arched delicately. "So you will accept the consequences of your actions?"

He tangled his fingers together - trying to stop his hands from trembling. "Yes, ma'am. I am prepared to accept them."

She snapped her fingers, and two angels appeared.  One of them was an extremely stocky man with sienna hair and an intense, crescented gaze. He had enough muscles on him that it looked as though he could break a tree in half, if the mood struck him. Daesung could easily imagine the man throwing angels out of Heaven; it would be impossible to escape his grip. The other was a dainty woman with soft, round features and silvery hair. She flashed Daesung a small smile, but there was still a decided sadness in her large eyes – as though she had seen too much throughout the eternities. It made Daesung’s heart ache to see the sorrow written so plainly on her in a place that was supposed to inspire happiness and peace. He wondered what could have brought her to such a state.

Before he could follow that train of thought to its completion, Chaerin spoke, “Kang Daesung, for your disobedience you are sentenced to train with Jong Kook and Boa until they declare you fit for duty. Upon your completion of your training, you will be made a general in the Army of Heaven and given command over your own unit. At that time you will be recognized as a fully-fledged seraphim and be able to lead as many charges into Hell as you’d like. Do you understand?”

He blinked up at her. “You mean I’m not being kicked out?”

Chaerin chuckled – hiding her laughter behind her hand. “No, Daesung. We wouldn’t kick you out for doing the right thing. We just want you to be safe, which is why we’re putting you in the hands of our two best trainers. They’ll see that you are fit for full duty in due time.”

Jong Kook strode forward and boldly took Daesung’s hand for a firm shake. “I will do my utmost to protect you and train you in combat. I look forward to working with you, Daesung.”

The younger angel bowed and flashed the man a somewhat nervous smile. “Thank you. I am certain you will take very good care of me.”

At that moment, the woman approached and bowed. “I am Boa. I’ll do my best to teach you about seraphim laws and angelic tactics.”

Daesung bowed to her as well. “I look forward to learning everything you can teach me. Thank you, Boa.”

Rising from her seat, Chaerin spread her large gold wings and flew down – landing beside Daesung. “We look forward to seeing what you make of yourself, Daesung. With wings like that, you certainly have a great deal of potential.” The blond folded into a ninety-degree bow as the woman spoke; he felt a bit like he was meeting the president.

“I will do my best,” he offered. Though, he was somewhat confused by her comment on his wings. Did they hold a meaning he did not understand?

“Excellent. Well, I look forward to hearing their reports on your progress. I will see you periodically as part of your assessments.” Chaerin inclined her head once before sauntering out the door, a gaggle of angels on her heels reporting on the various activities of the different legions.

Once she was out of the room, Daesung stood straight. He cleared his throat and brushed his sweaty palms against the thighs of his pants. “Can… I ask a stupid question?”

Jong Kook’s face split into a wide smile. “Best kind of question! Go ahead.”

“What did she mean about my wings? And being a general?”

Boa smiled slightly. “Wings are a sign of rank among the angels. Only tier three or above angels have them, and the larger the wings the higher status the angel.” There was a faint glow around her before a set of lilac wings appeared behind her. Unlike his wings, which drug the ground, hers stopped mid-thigh. “Most seraphim have wings my size. It’s big enough to get us where we need to go with ease, but not quite as impressive. Taecyeon, if you remember his wings, has a very large set because he is the general of the Second Hour Legion, which is the most elite force of angels we have. Chaerin, since she is the head of the seraphim, actually has four wings. Only the highest archangels – the ones that guard the high throne itself – have six wings.”

Daesung let out a slow breath and looked back at his wings. “So… I am equal in rank to someone like Taecyeon?” It sounded a bit ridiculous, honestly. He was just a nobody; even in life the most recognition he had received was occasionally selling a sculpture.

But, Jong Kook nodded happily. “Once you finish training you will be. At that point, you’ll be a general. You’ll form your own specialized unit, and eventually you’ll have enough angels to have a legion all your own! Isn’t that exciting!” He clapped Daesung on the shoulder, and it felt a bit like being hit by a brick wall.

Catching himself as he stumbled forward a little, Daesung smiled at the obviously enthused angel. “It sounds … interesting. I will do my best to live up to your expectations.”

Boa nodded. “Take tonight to rest. I’d imagine you’ve had enough adventures for one day. Tomorrow Jong Kook and I will pick you up. We can also talk about more permanent living arrangements. No point in having you in the trainee bunks now that you have technically graduated since your abilities have manifested.”

Daesung just nodded. He honestly had no idea what they were talking about – living arrangements, powers manifesting, training. But, he would learn. He had all of eternity to figure out what was going on in his new home. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Boa,” she corrected easily. “Technically you’re higher rank, even if you are younger. Plus, it’s Heaven. We’re not much for titles here.”

An easy grin at last broke out across Daesung’s features. “I will remember that. Thank you, Boa.” He bowed again before becoming distracted by someone lightly tugging on his sleeve. Turning, he laughed at the sight of Jiyong, who was smirking slightly. “Ji! Is Youngbae alright?”

The redhead grinned – his gums showing with the motion. “Yeah. They already healed him up and have him assigned to his first duties. I just…wanted to say thank you. For believing in me. And him. And, you know… Everything.”

Daesung swept Jiyong into a tight hug, his wings even coming to curl around the man. “It’s the least I could do for you, Ji. You’re my friend, whether you want me or not.”

The angel laughed softly and squeezed the blond’s waist. “I definitely want you as my friend, Daesung. You’ll have to come visit me and Youngbae often. He wants to get to know you better, and I want to hear all about your crazy adventures, oh mighty general.”

Pulling back, Daesung blushed. “You heard all that?”

Jiyong giggled. “Of course I did! And even if I hadn’t, I would’ve found out soon enough. It’s been two hundred years since the last seraphim general manifested! You’re a special little cookie, my friend.” He winked at Daesung. “Just what will Seunghyun think of you?”

A soft smile found its way onto Daesung’s lips as pure love made his eyes bright. “He’ll tease me for the rest of time.”

~~~

Walking into the hospital room, Mino felt his legs lose feeling at the sight of Seunghyun on the hospital bed. His brother looked so broken and small. So much of his body was either bandaged or in a cast; it looked as though he would not be moving anytime soon. But, the steady beep of the heart monitor was the most beautiful sound Mino had ever heard. His brother had survived. Going to Seunghyun’s side, he carefully took his hand and sank down into the cold plastic chair at the bedside. “You really gave me a scare, Seunghyun. What would I have done if you had actually left me, huh?” He sighed. “We’re supposed to grow old together, remember? You promised.” And Seunghyun was never one to break a promise.

When Seunghyun at last woke up, it was to the sight of Mino and Taehyun attempting to play checkers on the little table in the corner. The only problem with that plan, of course, was that it seemed Mino was ruthlessly trying to cheat because he was absolutely awful at checkers (and board games in general). Seunghyun managed a little laugh, which immediately caused both brunettes to abandon their game.

“Hyunnie!” Mino jumped to his feet, bumping the table in his enthusiasm, and charged to his brother’s side. “You’re alive!”

Seunghyun raised an eyebrow, causing the stitches on his forehead to stretch unpleasantly. “Is that what this is? Feels awful.”

“It’s how you know you’re with us,” Taehyun drawled. “If it didn’t hurt, it’d be a sign you had died.”

Seunghyun’s gaze unfocused as he stared at something on the ceiling. Or, perhaps more accurately, something beyond the ceiling. “But I did die,” he murmured. “I know I did.”

Mino and Taehyun exchanged a glance. Carefully, Mino took a seat on the edge of the bed. “How do you know that, Seunghyun?”

A little smile played around the edge of Seunghyun’s lips. “I saw Daesung.” He sighed softly. “He was always my angel, Mino, but now he’s a real one. And I got to see him.”

The artist carefully took Seunghyun’s hand in his. “And what happened when you saw him?”

“Mm, he told me he loved me. That he was would wait for me. That – “ Seunghyun’s voice choked, “he’s proud of me.”

Squeezing Seunghyun’s fingers, Mino fought back tears at the look on his brother’s face. Seunghyun looked at peace for the first time in … well, since their parents had died. He could not remember seeing his normally stoic brother look so happy; it was as though Seunghyun were ten years younger and all the cares had been lifted from his shoulders. “Well, you were pretty amazing,” Mino murmured. “I mean, you did save NamTae’s life.”

The antiques dealer’s gaze slid over to rest on Taehyun. “Are you alright?”

Taehyun gave a furious nod before wiping away a tear. “Yeah. Just a broken arm. I will be getting my cast off soon.”

“Cast… I was out for a while, wasn’t I?” Seunghyun sighed at Mino’s nod. “Has the shop fallen apart in my absence?”

Mino shook his head. “Nah. They’ve been taking good care of it for you. Yerin has been running a tight ship. But, they miss you. Especially Han Bin.”

Seunghyun laughed a little, though his ribs protested the motion by making him cough. “He would.” He shook his head. “Is … everyone else okay?”

“Ji-Hyo and Junsu come past every day,” Taehyun murmured. “In fact, they’ll be here probably closer to six. That’s when they usually drop past.”

Mino licked his bottom lip and nodded. "Yeah. And...there's a chance Daesung's mom might stop past. She's done that a few times."

Raising his eyebrows, Seunghyun looked up at his brother. "What? But... I've never even met her. The Kangs disowned Daesung when he came out."

The artist cleared his throat and rubbed at the back of his neck nervously. "Well, she heard from Ji-Hyo that you were in an accident and came to see you. Said she was worried about her Daesung's boyfriend."

Seunghyun's heart stuttered in his chest. He had never thought the woman that gave birth to his lover would acknowledge his existence, let alone recognize his relationship with Daesung. The man could remember countless nights of Daesung crying over his parents' refusal to see him after he had come out of the closet; it had broken the blond's heart to be rejected for something that was an integral part of his identity. The woman had not even come to the funeral; her husband had declared that Daesung had died years ago. But, it seemed time could heal any wound - even prejudice - if love was involved. "Is... she alright? Mrs. Kang." 

Mino nodded. "Yeah. She's worried about you. And I think she'll be really glad that you're alright." A tiny smile crept onto Mino's lips. "She's even been helping Ji-Hyo with the wedding, since you've been out. I think she's really trying to make things right."

Tears gathered at the corners of Seunghyun's eyes. Daesung was probably so excited that his mother had finally come around; Seunghyun just wished it had happened while the blond was still alive. But, at least it had happened at all. It meant there was even hope that Daesung's father would change his mind and welcome the Choi brothers into his family - that was what Daesung had always wanted. "Are the wedding preparations going okay?"

"Yeah. Yeah, they are," Taehyun laughed. "We're getting close enough to the big day that Ji-Hyo and I have been making official decisions on her cake design. It's going to be perfect, I think. But, of course, you'll have to approve it as well, since you're practically the best groomsmaid."

“How long have I been out?”

“About a month,” Mino murmured. “The car mostly hit your leg, because of how you were angled. But you hit your head badly enough that… Well, the doctors were honestly surprised you survived. They had to take out some of your skull to relieve the pressure, and then they had you in a coma so your brain could heal. Honestly, they didn’t expect you’d ever wake up, even when the swelling went down miraculously fast.”

Seunghyun smiled crookedly. “I’m sorry I worried you, Mino. But… I wasn’t going to die. I had too many promises to keep. Promised you we’d grow old together – raise our kids in the same neighborhood. Promised Mom and Dad I’d take care of you. Promised.. promised Daesung – “ Again, his tears smothered his voice.

“Promised him what?” Mino prompted, oddly fascinated and endlessly curious as to what fantasy his brother’s mind had invented.

_“Promise me, Seunghyun, that you will live a full life.”_

“That I’d live.”

_“Promise me you will fall in love again.”_

“Not just exist, but really live.”

_“And that, when you die, you’ll look for me. Because I will be waiting for you, love. I said I’d give you my heart for ever and ever and always, you know.”_

“And to not forget him – even if I move on.” The man sighed softly and turned to meet his brother’s gaze. “I think I’m ready, Mino, to rejoin humanity. I’ve been half-dead for too long.”

Mino’s features broke into his characteristic wide grin even as tears poured openly down his cheeks. “We’ll gladly take you, Seunghyun. The world just isn’t the same without you in it.”

“I know, Mino. I know. And you won’t have to imagine that world without me.” He squeezed his brother’s hand. “Not for a long, long time.”

At that moment, the nurse came in to check Seunghyun’s vitals. The woman was obviously young – perhaps even younger than Mino – and had large, brilliant eyes. Her pink lips pulled into a wide grin when she noticed her patient was looking at her. “Mr. Choi! It is so good to see you awake. The doctor was beginning to think you would sleep the whole winter away!” Stepping up beside the bed, she took out a little light and began to test his pupils. “My name is Ji-Eun. I’ve been one of your nurses for the past month.”

“She’s pretty much amazing,” Mino drawled. “She completely trashes Tae at checkers. It’s the best thing ever.”

Ji-Eun laughed – the sound filling the room with brightness like the tinkling of wind chimes. It was a nice laugh, Seunghyun thought. “You are too kind, Mino! But, I think I have you to thank for the times I’ve beaten Taehyun. You’re very good at distracting him when he starts beating me.”

Taehyun rolled his eyes even as the nurse and Seunghyun’s brother exchanged impish grins. “I stand no chance against them, Seunghyun. It’s ridiculous. I can only hope they’ll behave now that you’re awake.”

“Fat chance,” Seunghyun drawled. “If anything, Mino will only get worse. He loves to misbehave when I’m around.”

“It’s my job as your brother,” Mino protested. “It keeps you young.”

Unable to help himself, Seunghyun began to laugh, deeply and freely. Even with the weight of the plaster wrapped around his leg and the still healing injuries across his body, he had never felt better in his entire life. And, he supposed, it was all Daesung’s fault. After all, how could anything ever be that bad when an angel loved you?

~~~

Daesung sighed happily as the sun began to crawl towards daylight, bathing Seoul in the first blush of morning. He would never tire of the way the clouds furled about the city and melted away as day ate through the last hazes of the dusk. Seoul was as much a part of him as Seunghyun and Ji-Hyo: It was where he began and ended. Beside him, Jiyong shifted on the bench. “Is something the matter, Jiyong?”

A frown puckered the man’s brow as he looked over at the radiant angel. “Seunghyun is supposed to die Christmas Eve. It was his day,” he said warily.

“Mm. Funny thing about Death,” Daesung mused, “is that sometimes he changes his mind.” His umber eyes sparkled with hidden laughter as he glanced over at Jiyong. “Seunghyun has so much life still left to live – so much to give. I need someone here. Someone to be the uncle to my nephew and two nieces. Someone to let Junsu sleep on their couch when he upsets Ji-Hyo. Someone to help Mino purpose to Taehyun, when they get that far.”

Jiyong’s eyebrows folded up in surprise. “Mino and Taehyun are going to manage to get engaged? That’s a surprise.”

Daesung laughed easily, the sound ringing through the air. “Oh, they’re going to break up three or four times first – Taehyun is more of a diva than even you. And they’re going to make a lot of really painful mistakes along the way. But, eventually, they’ll realize where their hearts lie. When they do, their love will be as strong as any other seen in this world.”

The older angel nodded slowly; it sounded a bit like a corny romantic comedy to him. Youngbae would love to watch over those two, egging them along towards their happy ending, and Ji had a feeling that was exactly what was going to happen. His angel Bae had been assigned to the true love division, unsurprisingly. “Don’t you worry about Seunghyun? That he might be at risk to fall?”

Crossng his legs, Daesung leaned an elbow on his knee and cradled his chin in his hand. “Honestly? No. Because, for however long he stays here, I will protect him. And I trust him. He knows that I will wait for him, that I am waiting for him.” He smiled softly to himself. “Someday we’ll be together again. In Heaven.”


	18. Fifteen Years Later

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who doesn't love a small epilogue?

“Dad, Uncle Nam is waiting for you,” the voice of Seunghyun’s eldest daughter, Sung-Mi, rang down the hall.

“Alright, alright. Tell him I will be down in just a minute.” The brunette chuckled, finishing the sentence he was writing before setting his pen down. His fingers soothed fondly over the piece of paper even as a small smile remained on his bowed lips. In many ways, Seunghyun was the same man he had been that distant Christmas Eve so many years ago: His eyes were still piercing, his hair was still jet black, and his hands were still strong. But, time had also changed him. There were the traces of grey at his temples – just beginning to creep in – and crow’s-feet had begun to settle into the skin around his eyes. Those added details served to simply make him look more majestic and imposing; like a fine wine, he had simply gotten better with age.

Leaning back in his chair, he took a moment to look at the pictures that graced the surface of his mahogany Georgian Adam desk. A silver frame held a picture of him and Ji-Eun from their wedding day: She was radiant in white while he looked like a looming shadow at her side. He laughed a little. The sweet little nurse that had seen him through so many hours of physical therapy had helped heal more than his injured leg. Ji-Eun had been willing to accept Seunghyun so completely it had all but stolen his breath; she even referred to Daesung as the First Husband, even though Seunghyun had never actually married the man. When asked why she did that, Ji-Eun had simply smiled and said she knew Daesung would always be in her husband’s heart. And, she was right. Seunghyun’s love for the blond angel was as strong as ever, but he had learned that love was not something that came in a limited amount, to be carefully rationed. No, love was something that could be given endlessly, if you were willing. It had been hard to learn that; Seunghyun had not wanted to love again. But, he had promised Daesung he would do his best to live a full life and move on. Now he understood why the angel had asked him to make that promise: Seunghyun’s life had been so rich with Ji-Eun at his side, and he could not imagine a world without their children. If he had shut himself off from the chance of a second love, he would have been only a shadow of the man he could have become.

Next to the wedding photo was one of Seunghyun holding Sung-Mi on the day she had been come into the world; she had been born two weeks early and was so tiny. In the photograph, the little girl practically disappeared in her father’s large hands. He chuckled, remembering the way he had cried and cried while holding her in his arms for the first time. Looking down at her wrinkled little features and watching her blink up at him felt as though he were gazing into the face of a tiny angel. It reminded him of fire and golden hair and a wide smile.

When she had been little, Sung-Mi would come running to her parents’ room in the middle of the night with tears running down her face. At first, Ji-Eun and Seunghyun simply let the girl sleep between them, but soon the man had an idea of how to help his daughter sleep peacefully. One night, he had tucked her into bed and begun to tell her all about guardian angels. He told her that she had one particular angel, a beautiful man named Daesung, who was watching over her and protecting her every minute of the day. She had been skeptical: Who was this Daesung and why would he want to protect her? So, Seunghyun had taken her to his office and shown her the painting that hung on one wall. The little girl had gasped at the pure beauty of the figure on the canvas; he looked so strong and ethereal. “That is Daesung,” Seunghyun had told her. “And he loves you very much. Once upon a time, he and I were in love with each other. We were going to be together forever. But, one day, Daesung died.” Sung-Mi had looked up at her father in horror. Sitting in the old winged back chair, which was angled to catch the best sunlight, Seunghyun pulled his daughter into his lap. “I was so sad when he died, because I loved him. But Daesung – “ He took a slow breath. “Daesung isn’t gone.”

“He’s not?” Sung-Mi had a look of pure wonder on her face.

“No. He’s not. He’s an angel now, and he looks just like that. I know because I saw him.”

Her eyes went wide. “You did? How?”

“The year Daesung died, I got in a really bad accident. I almost died too. Daesung came to me then. He told me I was going to be okay and that he loved me.” Seunghyun let his chin rest on the top of Sung-Mi’s hair. “And he told me to love again, because he knew it’d mean I would get to have you and Mommy and your new baby brother. And do you know what, Mi?”

The little girl wiggled in her father’s grip. “What?”

“Daesung loves you too. He loves you as much as Mommy and I do, because you are part of his family too. And because he loves you, he will always make sure you are safe. There is no monster under the bed or nightmare that could ever hurt you, because Daesung is protecting you.” Seunghyun pressed a kiss her soft black hair. “Between him and me and Mommy, we’ll do everything we can to keep you safe.”

Sung-Mi had slid out of her father’s grip at that and walked over to the painting. Gently, she had laid a tiny hand on the canvas and stared up at Daesung for several long moments. Then, simply, she had said, “I love you too, Daddy Dae.”

Also among the cluster of photographs on the desk was a picture Ki Young and Ji-Yeon during their first dance recital. Ki Young was in the midst of doing a rather complicated windmill while Ji-Yeon was mid leap, her tiny hands stretched high above her head. His youngest daughter had eventually given up on dancing – preferring to take up martial arts instead – but Ki Young had become something of a dance machine. The boy had even begun to take home solo dance trophies and talk about one day auditioning for YG or JYP. Seunghyun snorted softly. Who knew his son would be such a brilliant dancer?

His gaze then came to rest on the two pictures – larger than the others – that sat behind the photos of his beautiful family. One was from Ji-Hyo and Junsu’s wedding; the entire party was crammed into the frame with wide smiles on their faces. Well, almost every face. Somehow Mino and Taehyun managed to get caught kissing in the upper corner of the picture. Seunghyun chuckled. The look on Junsu’s face when the photo had come back was priceless. He had turned to Mino and punched his shoulder before loudly declaring, “Couldn’t you keep your hands off of him for ten seconds!” Which had simply made Mino smirk. Even Mr. Kang had chuckled at the exchange and muttered, “Young love can’t be helped.” Seunghyun and Ji-Hyo had nearly fallen over in shock.

And there, on the inside edge of the picture formation, was a photograph of a young man with blond hair and the most beautiful smile in the entire world. Carefully, Seunghyun picked it up and gazed at the fine features he had last seen wreathed in fire. His angel. It had been one of the last pictures of Daesung: They had been admiring the cherry blossoms together when the blond had started to spin among the falling petals. In a flash, Seunghyun had captured the scene of the younger man laughing, his arms tossed wide and a brilliant smile on his full lips. It embodied the perfect joy with which the man had lived every single day of his life.

His thoughts about the blond were interrupted by the distinct sound of his daughter’s voice echoing down the hall: “Dad, are you coming?” Sung-Mi was nothing if not loud.

“Coming, coming.” He sat the picture down and smoothed his hand over the paper on his desk one last time. Rising, he sauntered out of his office and down the stairs. “You act like Uncle Nam is going to vanish or something.” Picking Sung-Mi up, he threw her over his shoulder and ignored her protests as he went to greet his brother-in-law.

And there on the man’s desk sat his list of tasks to complete that day:

  1. _Go shopping with Taehyun for Mino’s birthday present_
  2. _Take Ji-Yeon to Grandma and Grandpa Kang’s_
  3. _Stop past estate sale in Yonhi-dong_
  4. _Get groceries – mint ice cream!_
  5. _Help Ki Young with homework_
  6. _Love Daesung for the rest of time_



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can't believe it's actually over.
> 
> I feel kind of like I have just sent my first born child to college or something. It's gone off into the world and doesn't need me anymore.
> 
> Wow.
> 
> Well, hopefully you all found the ending to be satisfying. I know it is probably not the ending you expected, but it is the ending I felt best suited this story. As I mentioned before, there will be a sequel. It will deal with what Daesung is up to while Seunghyun is alive: Including gathering his own personal unit of angels and going against a demon lord even stronger than Seungri. So stay tuned for that: It'll be posted in the same series.
> 
> As always, if you enjoyed the story I would love to hear from you: comment, kudo, bookmark. I know those things can seem silly as a reader - I know it can seem like you have nothing to say - but every gesture of acknowledgement means the world to me. I honestly want to know what you thought of the ending, if there is anyone who should appear in the sequel, if you hate me for not getting ToDae together... All the things. But know that I love you all. Thank you for going on this journey with me. Without each of you, this story would just be a bunch of words without meaning.

**Author's Note:**

> If you enjoyed reading this chapter, please let me know! Comments give me life. :D


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